THE TRINING Book Three
Viewing comments for Chapter 31 "All For Love of Axtilla"JOURNEY INTO REDEMPTION
38 total reviews
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
A very good chapter as always, my friend. Bet you thought I missed this one--I wouldn't do that. I am off to read the next one~Debbie
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2016
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A very good chapter as always, my friend. Bet you thought I missed this one--I wouldn't do that. I am off to read the next one~Debbie
Comment Written 06-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2016
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Thank you, Debbie. You are too kind. Glad you enjoyed it.
Comment from Selina Stambi
Hello Jay,
I started reading last night (while this was still paying!) and then got too sleepy, I had to give up.
A fabulous chapter. What a cliffhanger. Can't wait to see how good old Doc weasles himself out of this situation!
"It would have been such a sweet life, my Doctrex," ... ah, be still my foolish heart! (Sigh) :)
I've been away for almost three months. Good to be back. Hope all's well with you, Jay.
Sonali
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2016
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Hello Jay,
I started reading last night (while this was still paying!) and then got too sleepy, I had to give up.
A fabulous chapter. What a cliffhanger. Can't wait to see how good old Doc weasles himself out of this situation!
"It would have been such a sweet life, my Doctrex," ... ah, be still my foolish heart! (Sigh) :)
I've been away for almost three months. Good to be back. Hope all's well with you, Jay.
Sonali
Comment Written 01-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2016
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All is indeed well with me, Sonali. You've made my evening with this high praise. While you've been gone I got a short story published in an on line literary journal. Kinda proud of that. It's in the current issue of Fabula Argentea and the story's called "The Uneven Zen of Time."
The next chapter's gonna be a game changer. You'll want to read it.
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Jay, congratulations on being published in the mag. How super-wonderful! Thrilled for you. :)
Comment from Walter L. Jones
cutting edge, a what comes now, foolish heart, mind lost, the plan, foreshadow, or just a smile away, let us keep pace with wonder, just me adjusting to the fork in the road, thank you Walt
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2016
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cutting edge, a what comes now, foolish heart, mind lost, the plan, foreshadow, or just a smile away, let us keep pace with wonder, just me adjusting to the fork in the road, thank you Walt
Comment Written 01-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 01-Jun-2016
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Hey, thank you so much, Walter. I love your reviews. They are stream of consciousness, like your poems. You have an amazing mind, friend. Glad you exercise it on my novel.
Comment from --Turtle.
Ah, doodles, I missed this one,
Great chapter though, Jay... loads of action, good strong suspense. The dialogue was brief and added a bit of humor to the mix. Doctrex/Pondria is on a race with his heart in one hand, little more in the other, and practically his pants around his ankles in a scramble to recover from Axtilla's curve ball.
the shirt, I shrugged it on[,] and sat on the bed, stockings in hand, still trying to
The formal dining room where we'd eaten several nights ago[,] was a room off "Okay, listen. I don't have time to explain [anything], but I need the directions
If Chiel was wrong[,] and even one guard was positioned on the other side of the
When I got through to the garden side, I looked both ways, let out a breath and {began to close}(slowly closed?) the door. Before it latched, I reached my hand in
mind. It would have been such a sweet life, my Doctrex.
My jaw seized with trembling. "It still will (be)?," I said, under my breath. "I
was looking for. I scrabbled toward a bush, much smaller than the one I'd just
My thighs--unused to any exercise[,]? and now [being]? in constant flex--were on
seeing my legs protruding from the back of the bush. I could wait no longer.
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2016
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Ah, doodles, I missed this one,
Great chapter though, Jay... loads of action, good strong suspense. The dialogue was brief and added a bit of humor to the mix. Doctrex/Pondria is on a race with his heart in one hand, little more in the other, and practically his pants around his ankles in a scramble to recover from Axtilla's curve ball.
the shirt, I shrugged it on[,] and sat on the bed, stockings in hand, still trying to
The formal dining room where we'd eaten several nights ago[,] was a room off "Okay, listen. I don't have time to explain [anything], but I need the directions
If Chiel was wrong[,] and even one guard was positioned on the other side of the
When I got through to the garden side, I looked both ways, let out a breath and {began to close}(slowly closed?) the door. Before it latched, I reached my hand in
mind. It would have been such a sweet life, my Doctrex.
My jaw seized with trembling. "It still will (be)?," I said, under my breath. "I
was looking for. I scrabbled toward a bush, much smaller than the one I'd just
My thighs--unused to any exercise[,]? and now [being]? in constant flex--were on
seeing my legs protruding from the back of the bush. I could wait no longer.
Comment Written 01-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2016
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Super! Thank you, Turtle. Oh, the comma! If I live to be 50 I'll never get it straight. I'm thrilled you enjoyed the pace of this chapter. The next chapter's a game changer, so make sure you read it. If'n you wanna! Again, thanks. You made my night with the six!
Comment from chasennov
The search begins. A chapter in the book THE TRINING Book Three. All For Love of Axtilla. This is as fine a chapter as I have ever read, Jay. This is probably the last post I will be reading and reviewing before I depart from FS. Stay well, my friend. I lied in my parting speech. I did learn an awful lot from you, thank you for that. I will be in touch. by mail. Kindest regards. Chas.
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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The search begins. A chapter in the book THE TRINING Book Three. All For Love of Axtilla. This is as fine a chapter as I have ever read, Jay. This is probably the last post I will be reading and reviewing before I depart from FS. Stay well, my friend. I lied in my parting speech. I did learn an awful lot from you, thank you for that. I will be in touch. by mail. Kindest regards. Chas.
Comment Written 31-May-2016
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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Many thanks, Chas, for your complimentary and kind review. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Sorry to see you go, my friend. Thanks for spending one of your last sixes on me!
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As always, you are most welcome, Jay. I will be in touch. Goodbye, my friend.
Comment from mfowler
It's quite an adventure, this story. You've adapted to the genre in great style (you may well be experienced, for all I know.LOL) This chapter is built on great action and a healthy dose of emotion. Doctrex has every reason to be pissed with Axtilla. His clandestine plan to reach her room is fully played out in this episode. I tracked your writing closely and found your detailed 'showing' transfers from the style I'd become used to, to the action elements of this genre. A great read, as always.
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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It's quite an adventure, this story. You've adapted to the genre in great style (you may well be experienced, for all I know.LOL) This chapter is built on great action and a healthy dose of emotion. Doctrex has every reason to be pissed with Axtilla. His clandestine plan to reach her room is fully played out in this episode. I tracked your writing closely and found your detailed 'showing' transfers from the style I'd become used to, to the action elements of this genre. A great read, as always.
Comment Written 31-May-2016
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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Nope. Fantasy is new to me (well it was new when I started the Trilogy about 3 years ago.) I'm just thrilled the chapter entertained you. Thanks for your kind generosity.
Comment from Spitfire
As I say, I'm not into fantasy fiction, so I read these more to note the perfection of your writing. Excellent work describing the setting and the reaction of Doctrex, his fear of being discovered as he moves forward without a plan! I mean, who does that?
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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As I say, I'm not into fantasy fiction, so I read these more to note the perfection of your writing. Excellent work describing the setting and the reaction of Doctrex, his fear of being discovered as he moves forward without a plan! I mean, who does that?
Comment Written 30-May-2016
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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Doctrex does that. Cause Doctrex is a hero. And he's in love. You gotta catch the next chapter, though. You gotta. You just gotta. LOL, I'm getting so tired ... but I love the word "gotta" -- and the fact that spell-check tells me it's spelled right. Shari, thank you so much for the six stars. How do you keep them past the week end?
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I like 'gotta' too. As for stars I limit myself to one a day. :-)
Comment from write hand blue
Hi Jay. The story advances with Axtilla unexpectedly slipping out of Doctrex's room.
The clear descriptions give a good visual and this helps generate the tension felt by the reader as Doctrex locates her Apartment.
Another good addition to your book... ~Mel~
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
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Hi Jay. The story advances with Axtilla unexpectedly slipping out of Doctrex's room.
The clear descriptions give a good visual and this helps generate the tension felt by the reader as Doctrex locates her Apartment.
Another good addition to your book... ~Mel~
Comment Written 30-May-2016
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
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Many thanks, Mel. Glad you enjoyed this. You gotta catch the next one. It will be a game changer.
Comment from lancellot
This is a good chapter. I felt like a small side mission of a video game, and serves as an interesting pause before the real storm.
I felt a vague unease that I was without plans.
-I'm glad you mentioned it. It makes it more understandable he going on pure emotion.
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
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This is a good chapter. I felt like a small side mission of a video game, and serves as an interesting pause before the real storm.
I felt a vague unease that I was without plans.
-I'm glad you mentioned it. It makes it more understandable he going on pure emotion.
Comment Written 30-May-2016
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
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Great, Lance. Geez, I'm so happy you enjoyed this chapter. The next one is a game changer. The six is super, thanks.
Comment from nehasri
The chapter is very clearly laid out and intrigues me to want to read the book when it is ready. The characters all seem real and the chapter does hint at the plot of the story. The plot is not yet revealed but having read just this chapter, it also lends in a mystical side which may have been explored in the previous chapters or will be done in later chapters. The chef Chiel is instantly adorable.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
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The chapter is very clearly laid out and intrigues me to want to read the book when it is ready. The characters all seem real and the chapter does hint at the plot of the story. The plot is not yet revealed but having read just this chapter, it also lends in a mystical side which may have been explored in the previous chapters or will be done in later chapters. The chef Chiel is instantly adorable.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-May-2016
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
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Thanks so much for reading this, nehasri. There are only about 5 or 6 chapters to go in the last book of the trilogy. A lot has happened in the nearly half-million words I've written here. I'll let you know when the book is published--self-published or conventionally. If conventionally, I'll let the whole world know. LOL, thanks again.
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Sure, will look forward to it.
