St Louis
Viewing comments for Chapter 78 "St. Louis Chapter 33 part 3"Can McKenzie solve Megan Nelson?s murder?
16 total reviews
Comment from estory
I thought it was a bit slow at the beginning with some small talk but it gathered momentum towards the end and the closing scene was strong. We had this great sense of Mackenzie pulling back from the men around her here, determined to stake out her own space and keep control of her life. It all seems to point to her and Trey becoming a couple but here we see her suspicious of the people around her orchestrating this together and she wants it to be her decision. Great sharpened dialogue there at the end brings all that out. estory
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2020
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I thought it was a bit slow at the beginning with some small talk but it gathered momentum towards the end and the closing scene was strong. We had this great sense of Mackenzie pulling back from the men around her here, determined to stake out her own space and keep control of her life. It all seems to point to her and Trey becoming a couple but here we see her suspicious of the people around her orchestrating this together and she wants it to be her decision. Great sharpened dialogue there at the end brings all that out. estory
Comment Written 10-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2020
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Sorry for the late response. I put in 10 -12 hours a day at school. I appreciate your kind review.
Comment from Sally Law
Great continuing chapter with a twist at the end. I'm glad Logan confessed his feelings and intentions towards McKenzie. Girls just need that. :)
A few small improvements for your consideration.
-(Detective) Gardner. Spell out abbreviations in conversations, says my copy editor.
-You're right, it didn't. Comma needed here.
Great chapter with emotional impact. Logan is a prince of a guy. ;)
Sending you my best today as always,
Sal XOs......
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2020
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Great continuing chapter with a twist at the end. I'm glad Logan confessed his feelings and intentions towards McKenzie. Girls just need that. :)
A few small improvements for your consideration.
-(Detective) Gardner. Spell out abbreviations in conversations, says my copy editor.
-You're right, it didn't. Comma needed here.
Great chapter with emotional impact. Logan is a prince of a guy. ;)
Sending you my best today as always,
Sal XOs......
Comment Written 10-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2020
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Sorry for the late response. I put in 10 -12 hours a day at school. I appreciate your kind review. Yes, Logan is special. I will check those areas.
Comment from RShipp
"I'm pretty sure donuts aren't on your approved list." Come on logan...when are donuts ever on an approved list of things to eat!
I am enjoying the story.
Best wishes on this 'werid' teaching arrangement.
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2020
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"I'm pretty sure donuts aren't on your approved list." Come on logan...when are donuts ever on an approved list of things to eat!
I am enjoying the story.
Best wishes on this 'werid' teaching arrangement.
Comment Written 10-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2020
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Sorry for the late response. I put in 10 -12 hours a day at school. I appreciate your kind review. I go on-line Monday and as of this minute no clue how it's going to work. The district says they sent out the log-in codes to parents, but my parents say they haven't.
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Ouch. I remember the feelings of first day!
Comment from thaities, Rebecca V.
This story grows and grows on me. I see exactly where McKenzie is coming from in her understanding of Logan's concern for her. Hopefully she will see it from his angle.
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2020
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This story grows and grows on me. I see exactly where McKenzie is coming from in her understanding of Logan's concern for her. Hopefully she will see it from his angle.
Comment Written 10-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2020
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Sorry for the late response. I put in 10 -12 hours a day at school. I appreciate your kind review.
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You're welcome. You sure are busy.
Comment from Iza Deleanu
Oh, thanks to God, he finally admitted, he loves Mac and yes it's hard to get back to military when she is still in the hospital and not safe. Thank you for sharing and good luck with the next chapter.
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2020
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Oh, thanks to God, he finally admitted, he loves Mac and yes it's hard to get back to military when she is still in the hospital and not safe. Thank you for sharing and good luck with the next chapter.
Comment Written 09-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2020
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Sorry for the late response. I put in 10 -12 hours a day at school. I appreciate your kind review.
Comment from BethShelby
I like the way this novel is coming to a climax. I'm surprised that Max thought Logan was passing her off to another man. They are definitely a couple who care about each other but I think she is so independent that Logan will have his hands full. I anxious to read the last chapters although I hate to see it end. I'm away from home until this Thursday and that is way I not posting anything and reviewing much.
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2020
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I like the way this novel is coming to a climax. I'm surprised that Max thought Logan was passing her off to another man. They are definitely a couple who care about each other but I think she is so independent that Logan will have his hands full. I anxious to read the last chapters although I hate to see it end. I'm away from home until this Thursday and that is way I not posting anything and reviewing much.
Comment Written 09-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2020
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Sorry for the late response. I put in 10 -12 hours a day at school. I appreciate your kind review.
Comment from Ben Colder
Excellent, just excellent. Now we getting into the nitty gritty. Edging more toward long life marriage. Remember the man and woman private eye team years ago on TV.
I can see this unfolding toward the same series.
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2020
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Excellent, just excellent. Now we getting into the nitty gritty. Edging more toward long life marriage. Remember the man and woman private eye team years ago on TV.
I can see this unfolding toward the same series.
Comment Written 09-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 15-Aug-2020
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Sorry for the late response. I put in 10 -12 hours a day at school. I appreciate your kind review.
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Wow. Brute for punishment.
Comment from Sankey
What a terrific, semi-concluding chapter. Good to hear everything is coming to a head and the investigation has been successful. Not a spag anywhere. Keep it coming, please.
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2020
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What a terrific, semi-concluding chapter. Good to hear everything is coming to a head and the investigation has been successful. Not a spag anywhere. Keep it coming, please.
Comment Written 09-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2020
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from royowen
So now it's out in the open, Logan has confessed his love for her, now he thinks they're an item. Where do we go from here? With Sidney Parks in custody, it will be interesting to see how Logan's sister fits into things, and the shady things going on. Well done Barbara, Great storytelling, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2020
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So now it's out in the open, Logan has confessed his love for her, now he thinks they're an item. Where do we go from here? With Sidney Parks in custody, it will be interesting to see how Logan's sister fits into things, and the shady things going on. Well done Barbara, Great storytelling, blessings Roy
Comment Written 09-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2020
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Thank you for the kind review and encouragement.
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Most welcome Barbara
Comment from Ric Myworld
Well, don't tell anyone, you'll ruin my image, but you sure do make me like the mushy parts. With school starting back and only four more chapters, I'll probably be having withdrawals for a while. LOL. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2020
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Well, don't tell anyone, you'll ruin my image, but you sure do make me like the mushy parts. With school starting back and only four more chapters, I'll probably be having withdrawals for a while. LOL. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 09-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 09-Aug-2020
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I'll still post on Sunday's. I already have my next novel almost finished. I doubt I get it finished until our next break, but I will still post it. I know how it's ending, unless my characters convince me differently, sometimes they do. Mac and Logan told me this wasn't going to end the way I had planned, so I changed the ending. LOL Thank you for the kind review.
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Yeah, I'm glad you'll still post. Of course, crazy as this sounds, I'm back in college myself. And depending how hard this semester is, I might not be around much. I'm glad to hear your stories change sometimes. They should change as they move along and the characters grow. :-)