Judas Blue
Hopefully you can find whatever meaning appeals most to you.8 total reviews
Comment from Mystic Angel 7777
Nice CYA on the notes, but fear many will differ with your 'no rules' policy. Fortunately, you are not using any of the structured styles where rules can attack back LOL. You deliver a simple Rhymed Verse with clean, concrete end rhyme delivered in a discernible and consistent pattern (BTW - that's the rules for Rhymed Verse LOL). Your use of imagery evokes more in the way of emotional rather than visual response which I think works well given the tone and content of this piece. Well done and thank you very much for sharing it.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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Nice CYA on the notes, but fear many will differ with your 'no rules' policy. Fortunately, you are not using any of the structured styles where rules can attack back LOL. You deliver a simple Rhymed Verse with clean, concrete end rhyme delivered in a discernible and consistent pattern (BTW - that's the rules for Rhymed Verse LOL). Your use of imagery evokes more in the way of emotional rather than visual response which I think works well given the tone and content of this piece. Well done and thank you very much for sharing it.
Comment Written 01-Oct-2019
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
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Hi Mystic, my no rules ideal applies more to grammar etc rather than Structures. Obviously a set Type of poetry form should be in that form but too often I see a perfectly structured technical poem with as much evoked feeling as beige cardboard. Reviewers in my opinion spend more time nit picking instead of finding a meaning or emotions in a piece. Grammar can be improved, the ability to evoke real true feelings from a reader cannot.
If that makes sense?
Cheers for dropping in and leaving your thoughts!
I really appreciate it.
Comment from royowen
It's not entirely true there are no rules, some forms have very strict ones, trust me. And although I agree there is variety in scribing. You've chosen this ballad style, which really is meant to be a smooth flow, suited to music. I think you've scribed this well with that smooth flow, and 8686 quatrains with tetrameter/trimeter, I you've kept to a pretty strict regime. Well done, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2019
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It's not entirely true there are no rules, some forms have very strict ones, trust me. And although I agree there is variety in scribing. You've chosen this ballad style, which really is meant to be a smooth flow, suited to music. I think you've scribed this well with that smooth flow, and 8686 quatrains with tetrameter/trimeter, I you've kept to a pretty strict regime. Well done, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 27-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2019
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Hi Roy,
thanks for reading and the input.
Cheers
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Welcome
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A beautifully flowing write with no meter or grammar problems, but where is the punctuation? Just kidding, this is a delightful write, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2019
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A beautifully flowing write with no meter or grammar problems, but where is the punctuation? Just kidding, this is a delightful write, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
Comment Written 27-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2019
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Hi Dolly !
Nice to see you again :]
Thanks for dropping in for a read and leaving a review.
Cheers
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
This is a well written poem, my friend. I don't think the grammar nazis have any thing to object to in this well-penned poem, my friend~Debbie
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2019
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This is a well written poem, my friend. I don't think the grammar nazis have any thing to object to in this well-penned poem, my friend~Debbie
Comment Written 27-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2019
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Hi Debbie,
thanks for the review! I appreciate your time.
Cheers
Comment from Cindy Warren
I think she's not literally a zombie, she just feels dead inside because he lied and betrayed her. It's sad. I hope she can get over this guy and find someone worthy of her.
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2019
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I think she's not literally a zombie, she just feels dead inside because he lied and betrayed her. It's sad. I hope she can get over this guy and find someone worthy of her.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2019
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Hi there Cindy,
Thankyou for taking the time to read and review.
Cheers
Comment from Iza Deleanu
Interesting poem - You come to me with promises
of feelings that I seek
You comfort me and seal the deal
a kiss upon my cheek.
This will be an awesome entry for the rhyming poetry contest. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2019
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Interesting poem - You come to me with promises
of feelings that I seek
You comfort me and seal the deal
a kiss upon my cheek.
This will be an awesome entry for the rhyming poetry contest. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2019
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Hi there Iza,
I appreciate the review and thank you for taking time.
Cheers
Comment from themillerswife
I enjoyed the meter and format of the poem quite a bit. It flowed well and is easy to read as it is written. I was particularly touched by the first three stanzas. I think the message is very clear and straight forward, but for myself, it reminds me of a very one sided relationship with empty promises.
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2019
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I enjoyed the meter and format of the poem quite a bit. It flowed well and is easy to read as it is written. I was particularly touched by the first three stanzas. I think the message is very clear and straight forward, but for myself, it reminds me of a very one sided relationship with empty promises.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2019
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Hello there millerswife,
thankyou for spending a moment to read and review !
Cheers
Comment from giraffmang
Hi there,
this is good. It flows very well indeed and reads smoothly. very relatable.
The darkness like a siren's call
so easily choose you - was wondering here if choose should be chose.
It's always nice to regard someone who may offer a suggestion or two to be likened to a group of folk of killed off over six million people...
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2019
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Hi there,
this is good. It flows very well indeed and reads smoothly. very relatable.
The darkness like a siren's call
so easily choose you - was wondering here if choose should be chose.
It's always nice to regard someone who may offer a suggestion or two to be likened to a group of folk of killed off over six million people...
Comment Written 27-Sep-2019
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2019
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Thank you mang :)
I appreciate the time and thought spent in review.
Cheers
