Reviews from

Lonely Speed Road

A person drives fast in speed roads

27 total reviews 
Comment from Bill Schott
Excellent
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This dribble, Lonely Speed Road, has the required word count and finds the frustrated automobilist enjoying an unscrutinized period of accelerated driving which was, apparently just the ticket for stress relief.

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2019


reply by the author on 17-Jun-2019
    Thank you! I am so happy that you enjoyed my story!
Comment from moongirlwriter
Excellent
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I've enjoyed a few "pedal to the metal" rides but always consider myself lucky to have come out alive. When I see all the racing cars on the news and the drivers don't come out alive, I'm thankful. Be careful out there.
Enjoyed the writing and the graphic. :)

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2019


reply by the author on 17-Jun-2019
    Thank you! I am so happy that you enjoyed my story!
reply by moongirlwriter on 17-Jun-2019
    :)
Comment from samandlancelot
Excellent
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Raul1,

Too bad your story fiction. Sounds like you'd really like to drive fast and not get a ticket. Have you ever tried drag racing at the race track? It's a lot of fun, and you don't need to worry about tickets.

Patricia

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2019


reply by the author on 17-Jun-2019
    No, I haven't. Thank you! I am so happy that you enjoyed my story!
Comment from gudbjorg
Excellent
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This is a good beginning of a story, it is clear and understandable and I enjoyed reading it although I'm not so fond of fast driving unless there's an emergency.
When I was young I might perhaps like to drive fast but in those times there wasn't much of an opportunity to speet drive. Wish you all the best with your writing ahead.


 Comment Written 17-Jun-2019


reply by the author on 17-Jun-2019
    Thank you! I am so happy that you enjoyed my story!
Comment from Chelsea Caffey
Excellent
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This makes me feel like the wind is in my hair! Have you ever driven on the Autobahn in Germany? There's basically no speed limit. This story reminds me of being there!

 Comment Written 16-Jun-2019


reply by the author on 16-Jun-2019
    Thank you! I am so happy that you enjoyed my story!
Comment from Janilou
Excellent
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The place looked deserted. There was no one here but me. I was driving in my car for a fun ride. I was speeding all through the streets. No police were around to stop me. Driving super fast without receiving speeding tickets. I have had the time of my life.

As a dribble fiction contest entry, I would have liked to have seen some kind of suspense or surprise at the ending. I know this is difficult with the limited word count but you need something to hook the reader.

For example:

The place looks deserted. No one here but me. Speeding through the streets in my car. No police to stop me. Driving super fast without consequence. I'm having the time of my life until I see..

What did he see? You decide. His mother? Perhaps he's a kid in a toy car. Perhaps he's an adult and sees an alien? His girlfriend? His wife? The possibilities are endless, but you want to give the reader a jolt at the end.

(I changed it to present tense and trimmed out a few words to give you room to add the ending. :-)

All the best,
Jan

 Comment Written 15-Jun-2019


reply by the author on 15-Jun-2019
    Thank you! I am so happy that you enjoyed my story!
Comment from Hugh McDowell
Excellent
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You've captured the feeling that many a driver has felt. I did the same thing on a deserted road with my truck (years ago). Reality bit me when I hit a mud patch and hydro planed to within four feet of a telephone pole! One suggestion; don't know if you need the word "in" for this sentence- I was driving in my car for a fun ride. Excellent. Hugh

 Comment Written 15-Jun-2019


reply by the author on 15-Jun-2019
    Thank you! I am so happy that you enjoyed my story!
Comment from Darlene Franklin
Average
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Flash fiction is difficult to write, but there still must be a conflict. Perhaps changing it to present tense would increase the sense of worry about speeding tickets, etc.? This feel like the set up to a longer piece which could be delightful.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 15-Jun-2019


reply by the author on 15-Jun-2019
    Thank you!
reply by Darlene Franklin on 15-Jun-2019
    Thanks,
Comment from James W. Reynolds
Excellent
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This more than a fiction story that I would love to read, it is one that I would love to live. It seems like more of a dream. But (on a more serious note), nice job. Much like the drive, it is a fast-paced story that is well told.

 Comment Written 15-Jun-2019


reply by the author on 15-Jun-2019
    Thank you! I am glad you enjoyed it!
Comment from Patty Palmer
Excellent
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I enjoyed reading your story about having a chance to go speeding through the streets of town, going faster and faster!How nice of the police to stay away so you could enjoy this thrill whole heartedly. Kind of a dream come true for speedsters like you!

 Comment Written 13-Jun-2019


reply by the author on 13-Jun-2019
    Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it!