Lingering Spirits
Echo through the halls20 total reviews
Comment from Mustang Patty
Hi there,
Thank you for sharing your wonderful entry for the Rhyming Poetry contest. The tale with you wove within the lines was great. I think this tale rivals Poe's 'The Tell-tale Heart.'
The fact that you were able to create the suspense within a rhyming scheme is nothing short of amazing,
~Mustang Patty~
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2019
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Hi there,
Thank you for sharing your wonderful entry for the Rhyming Poetry contest. The tale with you wove within the lines was great. I think this tale rivals Poe's 'The Tell-tale Heart.'
The fact that you were able to create the suspense within a rhyming scheme is nothing short of amazing,
~Mustang Patty~
Comment Written 04-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2019
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Thank you so much! What a nice compliment. Edgar Allan Poe is one of my favorite authors. I really appreciate the six star rating.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written horror rhyming poem. The souls of people who are murdered never come to rest until the one who murdered them are brought to justice. A great Halloween like topic as well.
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2018
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A very well-written horror rhyming poem. The souls of people who are murdered never come to rest until the one who murdered them are brought to justice. A great Halloween like topic as well.
Comment Written 21-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2018
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Thank you. Writing horror is new to me, but I'm having fun in the attempt. Thanks for reading and reviewing.
Comment from Spitfire
Fantastic! A great story told in rhyme so natural that it didn't interfere with the flow. Favorite line:
Around him rose up spirits, women discarded like rag dolls.
I felt great pleasure as they died, their names I can't recall.
Love the open ending.
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2018
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Fantastic! A great story told in rhyme so natural that it didn't interfere with the flow. Favorite line:
Around him rose up spirits, women discarded like rag dolls.
I felt great pleasure as they died, their names I can't recall.
Love the open ending.
Comment Written 20-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 20-Sep-2018
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Thank you for reading and for this wonderful six star review. I means a lot to me. :)
Comment from AprilViolet
Six stars! Exceptional poem! Gave me chills throughout. Definitely a contender in the rhyming contest! Best of luck in the contest!! My vote is yours!!!
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2018
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Six stars! Exceptional poem! Gave me chills throughout. Definitely a contender in the rhyming contest! Best of luck in the contest!! My vote is yours!!!
Comment Written 18-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 19-Sep-2018
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Thank you, I appreciate it.
Comment from damommy
A great and interesting story, Boogie, told me very good rhyme. I felt the meter was bumpy in places, needed a little straightening out. However the story was told well and was enjoyable to read.
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2018
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A great and interesting story, Boogie, told me very good rhyme. I felt the meter was bumpy in places, needed a little straightening out. However the story was told well and was enjoyable to read.
Comment Written 18-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2018
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Thank you for your helpful comments and for taking time to read my work. It's always appreciated.
Comment from Justin Chopin
This was a very creative story Nights. Enjoyed the contrast of characters that you have in this piece the arrogant serial killing neighbor who was responsible for slaughtering most of the people in the house he is looking at and the sly and intelligent old man who has some strange psychic powers that allow him to make the young neighbor feel the pain that he made his victims endure. Well written with a great rhythm. Keep up the great work.
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reply by the author on 18-Sep-2018
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This was a very creative story Nights. Enjoyed the contrast of characters that you have in this piece the arrogant serial killing neighbor who was responsible for slaughtering most of the people in the house he is looking at and the sly and intelligent old man who has some strange psychic powers that allow him to make the young neighbor feel the pain that he made his victims endure. Well written with a great rhythm. Keep up the great work.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 18-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2018
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Thank you for this great review. I appreciate you taking time to read my poem.
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You're welcome.
Comment from Nanny 6
What a great story from start to finish! This is my favorite genre, and for you to take the whole scenario and rhyme throughout along with consistant rhythm. Remarkable. This is one that will stay with me for awhile. It's got my vote!
Judy
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2018
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What a great story from start to finish! This is my favorite genre, and for you to take the whole scenario and rhyme throughout along with consistant rhythm. Remarkable. This is one that will stay with me for awhile. It's got my vote!
Judy
Comment Written 18-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2018
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Thank you so much for your kind words. I'm always blown away when someone gives me six stars...it means a lot. Thanks again. :)
Comment from Pamusart
This is wonderful Boogienights. I love crime dramas especially in poetry. It looks like a good entry for the contest. In this line it should be ensure rather than insure. Ensure means to make sure of. Insure means to take out insurance. Good luck in the contest. Thank you for sharing
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2018
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This is wonderful Boogienights. I love crime dramas especially in poetry. It looks like a good entry for the contest. In this line it should be ensure rather than insure. Ensure means to make sure of. Insure means to take out insurance. Good luck in the contest. Thank you for sharing
Comment Written 18-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2018
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Thank you this nice review and six stars, it brightened my day. Insurance might be a good idea too. Lol..thanks for pointing that out, I've already changed it.
Comment from Lance Polin
This is very good. There are a few spots where you may want to shift words around or slightly alter them, but you'll catch that on the re-read (as well as the wrong word in one instance!). The rhythm is mostly very good. The third stanza could use some sprucing up a little. The explanation at the end--the whole epilogue, is unnecessary and frankly it undermines what comes before. This is, after all, a first person poem. In many ways, even though the narrator is clearly a monster, the old man is really the bad guy of this piece. Oh--last line: I wonder what awaits for me, is it Hell that I may find?' Just suggestions as I look at musical notes. Great job.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2018
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This is very good. There are a few spots where you may want to shift words around or slightly alter them, but you'll catch that on the re-read (as well as the wrong word in one instance!). The rhythm is mostly very good. The third stanza could use some sprucing up a little. The explanation at the end--the whole epilogue, is unnecessary and frankly it undermines what comes before. This is, after all, a first person poem. In many ways, even though the narrator is clearly a monster, the old man is really the bad guy of this piece. Oh--last line: I wonder what awaits for me, is it Hell that I may find?' Just suggestions as I look at musical notes. Great job.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2018
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Thank you for your helpful suggestions and for reading and reviewing my poem.
Comment from fm wright
A great entry for the Rhyming poem contest. Fits in with this time of year. Also a great story it does tell. It flowed very smoothly and I could find nothing wrong with it in any way. Wishing you the best for the contest.
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2018
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A great entry for the Rhyming poem contest. Fits in with this time of year. Also a great story it does tell. It flowed very smoothly and I could find nothing wrong with it in any way. Wishing you the best for the contest.
Comment Written 17-Sep-2018
reply by the author on 18-Sep-2018
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Wow! Thank you this kind review and the six stars..I really appreciate it.
