Pastrami
A story-poem about my time in a small town jail19 total reviews
Comment from BeasPeas
Hi Brett. I really like your poem, well rhymed and humorous. A fine entry for the contest. I do have a couple suggestions. The presenting colors are too "hot" and font is hard to read. Suggest playing with the colors of background and font for better visual. Also suggest not starting each line with a cap if the thought continues from the previous line. This allows the reader to put the entire thought together easily and there is better continuity. Marilyn
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2018
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Hi Brett. I really like your poem, well rhymed and humorous. A fine entry for the contest. I do have a couple suggestions. The presenting colors are too "hot" and font is hard to read. Suggest playing with the colors of background and font for better visual. Also suggest not starting each line with a cap if the thought continues from the previous line. This allows the reader to put the entire thought together easily and there is better continuity. Marilyn
Comment Written 22-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2018
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Appreciate the suggestions. Glad you enjoyed this story in a poem. My first attempt at penning such a creation.
Comment from Ricky1024
This is a 'Sh are A Story Contest Entree rich in Theme and Imagery.
It flowed well and read well with no grammar issues as well.
Adjective Content and Objective Content were excellent and Descriptive Measures aligned perfectly.
Good luck with this Brett and have a blessed day.
"Keep speeding!"
"I miss my Vette!"
Dr Ricky 1024.Later today
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2018
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This is a 'Sh are A Story Contest Entree rich in Theme and Imagery.
It flowed well and read well with no grammar issues as well.
Adjective Content and Objective Content were excellent and Descriptive Measures aligned perfectly.
Good luck with this Brett and have a blessed day.
"Keep speeding!"
"I miss my Vette!"
Dr Ricky 1024.Later today
Comment Written 22-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2018
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Thanks. Appreciate the comments and the review. Glad you enjoyed this story in a poem. My first attempt at such a creation.
Comment from Deirdre Anne Gialamas
Dear
This was a very enjoyable read , thank you.
Last line is simply brilliant!
The rhyming works well and story moves along in order.
Warmest wishes,
Deirdre Anne
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2018
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Dear
This was a very enjoyable read , thank you.
Last line is simply brilliant!
The rhyming works well and story moves along in order.
Warmest wishes,
Deirdre Anne
Comment Written 22-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2018
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Glad you enjoyed this little story in a poem. My first attempt at penning such a creation. Appreciate you taking the time to read it and to write a review.
Comment from Phillip C Kuhn
Ha this was a good funny, I like the ending in particular, how you left in a rush, it had a sense of irony or a big F u to the small time judicial system, I really appreciate this piece
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2018
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Ha this was a good funny, I like the ending in particular, how you left in a rush, it had a sense of irony or a big F u to the small time judicial system, I really appreciate this piece
Comment Written 22-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2018
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After this ordeal, a "big F u" was in order, do you not think so? Glad you enjoyed this story in a poem. It was my first attempt at such a critter. Appreciate you taking the time to read it and pen a review.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written story in a poem. When someone's locked up in jail they have to eat what they get or starve to death. After a few days the food starts to get more bearable and the one who brings the food becomes our hero.
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2018
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A very well-written story in a poem. When someone's locked up in jail they have to eat what they get or starve to death. After a few days the food starts to get more bearable and the one who brings the food becomes our hero.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2018
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Glad you enjoyed this story in a poem. My first attempt at penning such a critter. After time locked up anything a person gets starts to look better. Much appreciate you taking the time to read this posting and pen a review.
Comment from misscookie
I don't know cars by its name but my favorite color is read
You got my attention from the start, and the artwork you choose to go with your poem is a perfect match
Thank you for this early morning chuckle
And thank you for sharing.
cookie
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2018
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I don't know cars by its name but my favorite color is read
You got my attention from the start, and the artwork you choose to go with your poem is a perfect match
Thank you for this early morning chuckle
And thank you for sharing.
cookie
Comment Written 22-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2018
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Thanks misscookie. Always appreciate your spot on reviews. Gad you enjoyed this story in a poem. The first time I attempted to pen such a critter.
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It was my pleasure, have a nice Sunday
Cookie
Comment from kiwijenny
The biggest ticket my husband ever got was in South Georgia for speeding in a work zone. There were no workers present but orange cones. It was doubled for work zone that hadn't been worked on in years. We suspected that's how the police made their money in that small town.
Well penned story in a poem
God bless
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2018
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The biggest ticket my husband ever got was in South Georgia for speeding in a work zone. There were no workers present but orange cones. It was doubled for work zone that hadn't been worked on in years. We suspected that's how the police made their money in that small town.
Well penned story in a poem
God bless
Comment Written 22-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2018
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Glad you enjoyed this story in a poem. My first attempt at penning such a critter. Appreciate you taking the time to read it and write a review. Got to watch those small tows. Love them, live in one, but they can be notorious in a lot of ways.
Comment from Sugarray77
What a great poem about a small town in Georgia. The anecdotes the main character went through are so trite they are humorous. Well done. On this tale in a verse. It was well done. Good read.
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reply by the author on 14-Jul-2018
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What a great poem about a small town in Georgia. The anecdotes the main character went through are so trite they are humorous. Well done. On this tale in a verse. It was well done. Good read.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2018
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Thanks. Glad you enjoyed this piece. Appreciate the review.
Comment from Old Soldier
A good one. Love the rhyming, flow and structure. A fun read indeed. Thanks for sharing and keep writing and reading. ......
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reply by the author on 22-Jun-2018
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A good one. Love the rhyming, flow and structure. A fun read indeed. Thanks for sharing and keep writing and reading. ......
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This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2018
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Thanks. This one was fun to write. Appreciate your comments and support.
