Pastrami
A story-poem about my time in a small town jail19 total reviews
Comment from dragonpoet
Yes, things begin looking better after a while when they are your only choice.
Nine days in jail is a little stiff for speeding. I guess the sheriff's lecture on
the law didn't get listened to very well. Did you race out of town with the daughter.
Congrats on placing second in the contest
Keep writing
dragonpoet
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2018
  |
Yes, things begin looking better after a while when they are your only choice.
Nine days in jail is a little stiff for speeding. I guess the sheriff's lecture on
the law didn't get listened to very well. Did you race out of town with the daughter.
Congrats on placing second in the contest
Keep writing
dragonpoet
Comment Written 27-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2018
-
Glad you enjoyed this little story in a poem. Appreciate you taking the time to read it and write a review.
-
I did very much. You're welcome.
dp
Comment from Roxanna Andrews
Hi, I didn't see that you had come in second in the Share a Story Poem Contest. I am even more amazed that I won when I read the other poems. The committee was in a most generous mood I think or maybe drunk? Anyway great poem about speeding around town and getting caught. I've only gotten caught twice. Well one time a policeman got in front of me and wagged his finger at me in his rear view mirror. I had no idea he was beside me. I think I got away without a ticket because my plates were out of state. I hadn't got my new ones yet. Speeding tickets are a fortune now days, even when you go to the class, so I try to be a good girl now. Not really. Anyway congrats on your 2nd place win. Rox
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2018
|
Hi, I didn't see that you had come in second in the Share a Story Poem Contest. I am even more amazed that I won when I read the other poems. The committee was in a most generous mood I think or maybe drunk? Anyway great poem about speeding around town and getting caught. I've only gotten caught twice. Well one time a policeman got in front of me and wagged his finger at me in his rear view mirror. I had no idea he was beside me. I think I got away without a ticket because my plates were out of state. I hadn't got my new ones yet. Speeding tickets are a fortune now days, even when you go to the class, so I try to be a good girl now. Not really. Anyway congrats on your 2nd place win. Rox
Comment Written 26-Jul-2018
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2018
-
Thanks.
Comment from Sharon Haiste
This is a fun entry for the Share A Story In A Poem writing prompt.
Well told and the story line is clear within the verse.
Well done and good luck to you with the competition.
Sharon
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2018
|
This is a fun entry for the Share A Story In A Poem writing prompt.
Well told and the story line is clear within the verse.
Well done and good luck to you with the competition.
Sharon
Comment Written 27-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2018
-
Thanks. Appreciate the review.
Comment from royowen
That sounds like a most unfortunate time in your life, I've never known anyone to be locked up for speeding, drink driving, yes, but only overnight. Beautifully written Brett, I like the postrami looked better each day, and also the daughter. Written in excellent abcb rhymed quatrains and great imagery woven in the narrative, well done, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2018
|
That sounds like a most unfortunate time in your life, I've never known anyone to be locked up for speeding, drink driving, yes, but only overnight. Beautifully written Brett, I like the postrami looked better each day, and also the daughter. Written in excellent abcb rhymed quatrains and great imagery woven in the narrative, well done, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 27-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2018
-
Thanks. Glad you enjoyed this one. Appreciate the review.
-
Most welcome
Comment from fm wright
A very lightly way of putting into words a probably not so humorous situation. My only question is did you mean we would have sent-past tense or we would send-future tense? That part is not clear to me. Otherwise I liked the poem and how it turned out.
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2018
|
A very lightly way of putting into words a probably not so humorous situation. My only question is did you mean we would have sent-past tense or we would send-future tense? That part is not clear to me. Otherwise I liked the poem and how it turned out.
Comment Written 27-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2018
-
Thanks. Appreciate the review.
Comment from Rasmine
Hello, Brett, :)
Do you still race? I'll have to say I take the law's side on this. I live on a route and the cars drive like maniacs. When I try to cross, it's only once in a while one actually stops to let me cross and it's a law! It's a law that they are supposed to stop and let you go in a crosswalk. Oh well. I really enjoyed your poem -- reminds me of songs from the Charlie Daniel's band.
Sorry, this is so late in reviewing.
Nome
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2018
|
Hello, Brett, :)
Do you still race? I'll have to say I take the law's side on this. I live on a route and the cars drive like maniacs. When I try to cross, it's only once in a while one actually stops to let me cross and it's a law! It's a law that they are supposed to stop and let you go in a crosswalk. Oh well. I really enjoyed your poem -- reminds me of songs from the Charlie Daniel's band.
Sorry, this is so late in reviewing.
Nome
Comment Written 25-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2018
-
Glad you enjoyed this piece. Appreciate your insightful comments and the review.
Comment from Ulla
Hi Brett,seems a bit harsh to keep you nine days for speeding. Another thing is that it would be against the law. 36 hours is the most they can hold you without seeing a judge. But otherwise a fun poem. All the best. Ulla:))
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2018
|
Hi Brett,seems a bit harsh to keep you nine days for speeding. Another thing is that it would be against the law. 36 hours is the most they can hold you without seeing a judge. But otherwise a fun poem. All the best. Ulla:))
Comment Written 24-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2018
-
Much appreciated.
Comment from country ranch writer
Well lessons are always to be learned. You stay out of Georgia with a fast car, you watch out eating pastrami it can make you think weird things like escaping the jail. The best thing is just keep on going.
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2018
 |
Well lessons are always to be learned. You stay out of Georgia with a fast car, you watch out eating pastrami it can make you think weird things like escaping the jail. The best thing is just keep on going.
Comment Written 24-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2018
-
Much appreciated.
Comment from judiverse
Sounds like you were the one taken for a ride. That seems undue punishment for speeding. Small southern towns seem to have a reputation for that, though. Interesting about the pastrami sandwiches. I wouldn't have been interested, but I suppose things start tasting better after several days. Great story in a poem and it has a real country music flavor. Nice work with the rhyme, and good luck in the contest. judi
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2018
|
Sounds like you were the one taken for a ride. That seems undue punishment for speeding. Small southern towns seem to have a reputation for that, though. Interesting about the pastrami sandwiches. I wouldn't have been interested, but I suppose things start tasting better after several days. Great story in a poem and it has a real country music flavor. Nice work with the rhyme, and good luck in the contest. judi
Comment Written 23-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2018
-
Thanks. Glad you enjoyed this little story in a poem. First one I have ever attempted to pen. Amazing how things sometimes look better with the passage of time, and you become grateful for the small things offered. Appreciate the comment about "real country music flavor".
-
You're welcome. That certainly made a great story in a poem. Watch out for the speed traps! judi
Comment from Pamusart
Hi Brett. This may be the first poem I have seen from you. It is a good entry for the contest. My husband is an activist. He was arrested at a protest one time and spent the night in jail. His cell mate was one Edmund Kemper, a six foot eight inch tall serial killers. The name meant nothing to my husband. Kemper would kill young girls who hitch hiked and carve them and leave body parts in different places. They would wash up on the beach. Yuck. The local Sherrif, the judges, the mayor were all part of the Klan when he was a civil rights worker in the South. Being stopped on a country road was real dangerous. They were not supposed to pull over to the side of the road but were to drive to the nearest police station. Might still be killed once realeased. But not on the side of the road right away. Good luck in the contest. Thank you for sharing
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2018
|
Hi Brett. This may be the first poem I have seen from you. It is a good entry for the contest. My husband is an activist. He was arrested at a protest one time and spent the night in jail. His cell mate was one Edmund Kemper, a six foot eight inch tall serial killers. The name meant nothing to my husband. Kemper would kill young girls who hitch hiked and carve them and leave body parts in different places. They would wash up on the beach. Yuck. The local Sherrif, the judges, the mayor were all part of the Klan when he was a civil rights worker in the South. Being stopped on a country road was real dangerous. They were not supposed to pull over to the side of the road but were to drive to the nearest police station. Might still be killed once realeased. But not on the side of the road right away. Good luck in the contest. Thank you for sharing
Comment Written 22-Jun-2018
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2018
-
Thanks. This one was fun to write. My first love of writing is, and always will be, Country lyrics. I have not written any new ones of them lately, but, I do have more than 40 of them posted on this site that have reached All-Time Best status. Maybe, I'll post another one soon? As always, appreciate the support.
