Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin

Excellent

Hi,

A doozie of a kiss, I should think, to have all that power and control.

Good entry, and good luck in the contest.

Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'... Jax (*:*)

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2015

Comment from Dawn Munro

Excellent

Hmm, this was especially poetic prose, and highly enjoyable. I have one tiny suggestion - a comma, here - "If not mine in life(,) then in death." You fulfilled the prompt's requirements easily, even including rhyme - nicely done.

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2015

Comment from Margaret Snowdon

Excellent

A clever little piece -
a drama in so few words...

a good entry for the contest.
good luck to you, my friend.


Margaret

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2015

Comment from Tatarka2

Good

I commend you for taking on this difficult challenge. This is indeed a complete story in 60 words. I just didn't exactly see how the characters developed, or in fact know who they were. It's a tough task in so few words, I know. I just thought this could have been a bit more complete, even within the word limit.

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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2015

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reply by the author on 16-Mar-2015

May I ask? Are you in this contest too? If so, how many other entries did you mark down? What do you think that looks like?

Comment from humpwhistle

Excellent

Hmmm, a story disguised as a poem, or a poem disguised as a story? In my opinion (not binding), it's more a poem, as it lacks some of the key elements of a story.
Just an opinion.

Best of luck.

Peace, Lee

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2015

Comment from Walu Feral

Excellent

OOPS! G'day mate. That is very well done. It is hard to tell a complete story in 60 words when my poems take between 480 and 600 words to do the same thing. Good luck in the contest, you have a big chance with this one. Cheers fez

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2015

Comment from scd41

Excellent

The fantasy 60 word story raised more questions than it answered. When one is not sure if the woman is a witch or fairy, why should he make a vow to marry her? An knowingly why should one go for the kiss of death? Anyway, best of luck for the contest.

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2015

Comment from Jacob Collins

Excellent

A well written piece of writing. I thought that you responded to the contest task well with this piece. I couldn't find anything to critique about your work. Good luck in the contest...Jacob

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2015

Comment from giraffmang

Excellent

Hello there,

This is an interesting piece for the competition. A bit different. Nice fantasy element.

Good luck in the contest.
GMG

 Comment Written 16-Mar-2015

Comment from rjuselius

Excellent

never underestimate a woman scorned is what i have experienced lately. dating a man whose ex can't handle it and makes our life miserable. this piece of literary art conveys the same message.
thank you for sharing!
good luck in the contest!
blessings!
rebekka x

 Comment Written 15-Mar-2015