Take My Hand
Lyrics in poemly fashion16 total reviews
Comment from Selina Stambi
Final answer comes from you
Tell me what else to do
Am I not enough for you? .. love these lines. They squeezed my heart.
Lori,
Your past experiences have served to make this song feel 'real', as opposed to just words. It reminds me of a song that keeps going, "I'll be there." Can't remember the name of the singer (darn it!)
Hugs to you, my friend.
xxx
Sonali :)
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2014
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Final answer comes from you
Tell me what else to do
Am I not enough for you? .. love these lines. They squeezed my heart.
Lori,
Your past experiences have served to make this song feel 'real', as opposed to just words. It reminds me of a song that keeps going, "I'll be there." Can't remember the name of the singer (darn it!)
Hugs to you, my friend.
xxx
Sonali :)
Comment Written 08-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2014
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is it Michael Jackson? Just call out my name and I'll be there.
Forgot about that song and same name. Should I change it to "I'm There"?
thxs for review Sonali, lots of support for this one.
lulube
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I think the name change would be good. Or else the reader is bound to think of the MJ song (yes, that's the one!) Hugs and kisses xxx
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Ok I'll make the change thxs
lulube
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I changed it again to Take My Hand
lulube
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Sounds good, doll. And yes, 'fave' is an accepted spelling. Forgot to reply to that. xx
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lol
lulube
Comment from boxergirl
Your lyrics in a poem have a lot of potential. I wish I was better at creating the music to them. I especially like the chorus. 8-)
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2014
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Your lyrics in a poem have a lot of potential. I wish I was better at creating the music to them. I especially like the chorus. 8-)
Comment Written 08-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2014
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I wish I was able to create the music too!! I've heard that there are actual classes to teach you how to write music. I know how to read music so half the battle is won. I should look into it some day,
glad you liked it and thxs for the review
lulube
Comment from Smoothiecool
your well chosen words allow the reader to see and feel the love you have and waiting on an answer to come
good visual to portray message
good rhyme through out
good beat and rhythm
cheers smoothiecool
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2014
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your well chosen words allow the reader to see and feel the love you have and waiting on an answer to come
good visual to portray message
good rhyme through out
good beat and rhythm
cheers smoothiecool
Comment Written 07-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2014
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thxs for your always great review smoothie. glad you liked it, now if only I could put it to a tune.......lol
lulube
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most welcome ..SC >.Faye
Comment from krys123
Lulube;
Sensational and marvelous lyrics for a song that I shall work on. But a note you're familiar with I have my own digital studio and I've been working on my own album now is the album that I've written and '83, '98 and '04.
So recently I'm working on my 16 songs which to have been published in recorded.
the lyrics are fantastic in a way that your hook (Something that the listener or reader catches onto an Forget) is fantastically written.
The inner feelings and emotions in these lyrics are very expressionistic and descriptive to say the least.
I'm going to make a copy of this today and I should be getting back to you probably within 2 to 3 weeks.
My e-mail is: (krys123.654@gmail.com). I should try to do through blues or rock blues to it similar to like the blues that Eric Clapton uses.
I'm not committed to know one of my songs but I have a nine YouTube under the name (Alex Krysyna) and the songs name is (IT'S GONNA BE A LONG TIME VIDEO).
Thank you for sharing and posting this for everyone to read especially myself and may the Lord be with you always Luube.
Alex
PS: the name of my studio is, Coastline Studios LTD.
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2014
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Lulube;
Sensational and marvelous lyrics for a song that I shall work on. But a note you're familiar with I have my own digital studio and I've been working on my own album now is the album that I've written and '83, '98 and '04.
So recently I'm working on my 16 songs which to have been published in recorded.
the lyrics are fantastic in a way that your hook (Something that the listener or reader catches onto an Forget) is fantastically written.
The inner feelings and emotions in these lyrics are very expressionistic and descriptive to say the least.
I'm going to make a copy of this today and I should be getting back to you probably within 2 to 3 weeks.
My e-mail is: (krys123.654@gmail.com). I should try to do through blues or rock blues to it similar to like the blues that Eric Clapton uses.
I'm not committed to know one of my songs but I have a nine YouTube under the name (Alex Krysyna) and the songs name is (IT'S GONNA BE A LONG TIME VIDEO).
Thank you for sharing and posting this for everyone to read especially myself and may the Lord be with you always Luube.
Alex
PS: the name of my studio is, Coastline Studios LTD.
Comment Written 07-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2014
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Well I wrote down your you tube info and I'll check you out Alex. and that would be great to get a tune to these lyrics. We'll be a team, and have a couple of hit records. lol
thxs for this glorious review/.
was a flaming red sunset here tonight so I sent you some pics.
lulube/lori
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Oh! thank you so much for the pictures.
And maybe it will be a hit, who knows.
But we could post it on YouTube with some pictures.
Alex
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not a bad idea
Sonali brought it to my attention of another song named I'll be there, so what do you think, should I rename it? maybe "I'm There"
lulube
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Alex I changed the title to Take My Hand
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That'll work just fine.
Alex
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I don't know who it's up to you!
Alex
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Think I'll Be There is Michael Jackson.
Just call out my name, and I'll be there.
lulube
Comment from TAB_that's me
Hey lulube, this is a great song. I love the occasional rhyme and the repeating lines of what I assume to be the chorus.
teresa
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2014
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Hey lulube, this is a great song. I love the occasional rhyme and the repeating lines of what I assume to be the chorus.
teresa
Comment Written 07-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2014
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ya you assumed right, I didn't know if I SHOULD list it on the side but I just went for the straight poem look. I figured to make the chorus the easiest to remember for a listener to sing along with it. I'm dreaming big. lol
thxs for your review. a member is going to have a look and see if he can come up with a tune for it.
lulube
Comment from adewpearl
solid rhymes
effective use of chorus
strong emotional appeal
I like the focus on "take my hand," a good concrete manifestation of love and support
Brooke
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2014
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solid rhymes
effective use of chorus
strong emotional appeal
I like the focus on "take my hand," a good concrete manifestation of love and support
Brooke
Comment Written 07-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2014
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thxs so much for your time and review on this one Brooke
another note - How is Maureen doing?
lulube
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Hi Lulube - Good lyrics - hope someone will come up with the tune. A love song - appealing, and you never give up LOL. 'Should I let go? Tear myself away - Promise I'll walk slow' - I like that bit, amusing - walk slow and hope he will catch up LOL. Kind regards Dorothy x
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2014
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Hi Lulube - Good lyrics - hope someone will come up with the tune. A love song - appealing, and you never give up LOL. 'Should I let go? Tear myself away - Promise I'll walk slow' - I like that bit, amusing - walk slow and hope he will catch up LOL. Kind regards Dorothy x
Comment Written 07-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2014
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A true die hard. lol Glad you liked it Dorothy, I never know whether or not to post lyrics. Not that I have a lot of them, but what I do have I think I've only posted 3, or maybe 2. lol
thxs for your great review Dorothy
lulube
Comment from lakeport
I'll be there, indeed that's a very lovely and romantic expressed lyrical poem.Nice flow, I enjoyed reading it, God bless you. Hugs!Lakeport.
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2014
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I'll be there, indeed that's a very lovely and romantic expressed lyrical poem.Nice flow, I enjoyed reading it, God bless you. Hugs!Lakeport.
Comment Written 07-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2014
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thxs lakey for your great review
lulube
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your welcome,Hugs!lakeport.
Comment from Andrewajgblue
This would make a great song, i liked the repetition of the hand running through the song, its really poetic, and i think the rhythm is great and makes it very catchy, well done,
Andrew
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2014
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This would make a great song, i liked the repetition of the hand running through the song, its really poetic, and i think the rhythm is great and makes it very catchy, well done,
Andrew
Comment Written 07-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2014
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thxs so much for your great comments in this review. this is very encouraging, so I thank you for that.
lulube
Comment from Blue Thursday
This will make a great song, and many people will find it relatable. It's got a great little groove to it. I love how you so neatly placed your wording to make it sing. The art is a beautiful choice to go with it. Very lovely. It's amazing how long a person can stick out when it cones to love. Kind of surprises me, really. Have a good day.
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2014
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This will make a great song, and many people will find it relatable. It's got a great little groove to it. I love how you so neatly placed your wording to make it sing. The art is a beautiful choice to go with it. Very lovely. It's amazing how long a person can stick out when it cones to love. Kind of surprises me, really. Have a good day.
Comment Written 07-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 07-Sep-2014
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thxs for your generous comments in this review Blue. I'm glad you found a melody to it when you read it.
lulube
