Comment from Rosalyne

Excellent

Hi, Karen.
You have done a wonderful job capturing the feel of high school age girls. I really like how you've given Cynthia attitude, and shown how Becca senses something is up with her friend, asking if she's high. You ended the chapter well, leaving the reader wanting more.
Bye
Rosalyne :)

 Comment Written 08-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 08-Aug-2014

Thanks so much,Rosalyne! Hope you are having a great summer! 8-)

Comment from adewpearl

Excellent

You convey her worried and upset emotions effectively as you depict her taking the pill out of desperation.
Excellent dialogue between friends. I can really feel her friend's concern.
Brooke

 Comment Written 08-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 08-Aug-2014

Thanks so much, Brooke. 8-)

Comment from Writingfundimension

Excellent

It's really nice to have family fiction to review for a change. Especially, when it's written so well. Becca appears headed for a crisis, which may derail her self-destructive course. Good use of dialogue to further your story, BG.

:) Bev

 Comment Written 08-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 08-Aug-2014

Thanks, Bev. I appreciate your review. Cynthia is headed down a hard road; Becca is her friend. Easy to mix up when we are reviewing so many stories. I called unicorns dragons one time. lol

reply by Writingfundimension on 08-Aug-2014

Sorry, BG. I'll try to keep them straight next time I review. :) Bev

reply by the author on 08-Aug-2014

No problemo. 8-)

Comment from Spitfire

Excellent

This is holding my attention not only because of the plot, but the excellent writing. And, of course, even though Cynthia on drugs, I still feel sympathy for her. That's important in a novel-- to connect with the protagonist even with her flaws and attitude.

 Comment Written 07-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 08-Aug-2014

Thanks for the great review, Shari, and I'm happy that you could sympathize with Cynthia's struggle. 8-)

Comment from Acquired Taste

Excellent

Quite nicely done - enough in this chapter to really set the stage for ensuing chapters. Just how hooked is she? What about the scout? What will she do when coach puts her in and she can't perform?

Enjoyed this and look forward to more. AT=/

 Comment Written 07-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 08-Aug-2014

Thanks, AT. I am so happy that you enjoyed this chapter. Great questions to ponder and some will be answered in the next chapter. 8-)

Comment from Phyllis Stewart

Excellent

Uh, oh. This can't go well. Tranqs with sports are not a a good mix. She'll play badly, if at all. Glad I popped in on this.. missed it for some reason. Weird.

 Comment Written 07-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 07-Aug-2014

Glad you stopped by! Yes, some lessons have to be learned the hard way. 8-)

Comment from gypsycaravan

Excellent

This is a well-written book chapter with lots of unanswered questions for the reader. I look forward to following and going back to read the first 3 parts. Good job.

 Comment Written 07-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 07-Aug-2014

Thank you so much and I hope you will take a look at the other parts just yo get the big picture. 8-)

Comment from jmdg1954

Excellent

Hey, boxergirl. This old ex-baseball coach has been waiting for part4 to post. You didn't dissapoint that's for sure.

There are a few different lessons in your story. I can't wait for part 5 and hopefully beyond.

Well done, John

 Comment Written 06-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Aug-2014

Thanks, John. Any input from one coach to another will always be welcome. 8-)

Comment from sweetwoodjax

Excellent

this is very well written, boxergirl, you did an excellent job writing this story about the girl who uses drugs to help her with her stress. I enjoyed reading it....

 Comment Written 06-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Aug-2014

Thank you for reviewing! 8-)

Comment from kiwijenny

Excellent

This is good writing...keeps us on the edge of our seat.....
Why did she pop that pill.....why .. Without stupidity there would be no tense situations though would there...well done
God bless

 Comment Written 06-Aug-2014

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reply by the author on 06-Aug-2014

Yes, some lessons are learned the hard way. Thanks!