Killings in Chicago
I'm heart broken31 total reviews
Comment from Muffins
I can see why this is the contest winner. The truth blazes throughout every word written in this piece.
Only a very few black stations talk real like radio host, Alex Kidd, and discuss the heartbreaking crime rate among blacks and Hispanics. It's easy to point and blame the man, the KKK, the gun makers,or ghost. Everything and I mean everything starts from the home. Home is the starting point. Alex pinpoint it so hard when he said,"So you don't blame the gangs, the seventy-five percent single mother family rate, or the sixty percent high school drop-out rate, or babies raising babies?" If the home is broken and there is no one outside the home to interrupt the story, the cycle of ignorance and violence will continue. A powerful message.
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I can see why this is the contest winner. The truth blazes throughout every word written in this piece.
Only a very few black stations talk real like radio host, Alex Kidd, and discuss the heartbreaking crime rate among blacks and Hispanics. It's easy to point and blame the man, the KKK, the gun makers,or ghost. Everything and I mean everything starts from the home. Home is the starting point. Alex pinpoint it so hard when he said,"So you don't blame the gangs, the seventy-five percent single mother family rate, or the sixty percent high school drop-out rate, or babies raising babies?" If the home is broken and there is no one outside the home to interrupt the story, the cycle of ignorance and violence will continue. A powerful message.
Comment Written 15-Jul-2014
Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin
Hi lancelott,
Nicely told story. Congrats on the win, it is most deserved. Love the last line.
Cheers * Blessings
Keep Smilin'... Jax
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Hi lancelott,
Nicely told story. Congrats on the win, it is most deserved. Love the last line.
Cheers * Blessings
Keep Smilin'... Jax
Comment Written 14-Jul-2014
Comment from Cindy Warren
Congratulations on your win. It was well deserved. You're right, people need to take responsibility for their actions. Blaming guns, drugs, or booze is senseless. These things don't make desisions, and if we choose to take guns into our hands, or put substances into our bodies, then we choose the concequences.
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Congratulations on your win. It was well deserved. You're right, people need to take responsibility for their actions. Blaming guns, drugs, or booze is senseless. These things don't make desisions, and if we choose to take guns into our hands, or put substances into our bodies, then we choose the concequences.
Comment Written 13-Jul-2014
Comment from DanielEkine
Congratulations on winning the contest. Your dialogue is very conversational and descriptive. It pulls the reader in from the beginning to the end of the read. A trait that is not easy to achieve. Great command of spelling, punctuation and grammar. Great job.
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Congratulations on winning the contest. Your dialogue is very conversational and descriptive. It pulls the reader in from the beginning to the end of the read. A trait that is not easy to achieve. Great command of spelling, punctuation and grammar. Great job.
Comment Written 13-Jul-2014
Comment from nancy_e_davis
Congratulations. I think you summed it up very well. It does seem to be a cultural thing. If people didn't have guns they would find another weapon to use. It's the people who kill not the weapon. Good job. Nancy
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Congratulations. I think you summed it up very well. It does seem to be a cultural thing. If people didn't have guns they would find another weapon to use. It's the people who kill not the weapon. Good job. Nancy
Comment Written 13-Jul-2014
Comment from amada
Congratulations in winning the contest. You followed very well the rules of the contest. Great theme selected, a radio show, I presume in the morning. Best wishes.
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2014
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Congratulations in winning the contest. You followed very well the rules of the contest. Great theme selected, a radio show, I presume in the morning. Best wishes.
Comment Written 13-Jul-2014
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2014
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Thank you very much
Comment from Cin
This story is very cleverly written and well executed - gun laws in Australia are different (very strict) and so I find the debate that occurs in America quite interesting.
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This story is very cleverly written and well executed - gun laws in Australia are different (very strict) and so I find the debate that occurs in America quite interesting.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2014
Comment from Chocolate Chip
WOW! You did your thang with this entry! I got so caught up in what you've written, I didn't even know I was at the end until I realized there were no more words left to read. What an excellent way expressing a very sensitive subject in a REAL & non threatening manner. To create a scene of a disc jockey & a radio station was genius! Its seems easier to place the blame on the majority of society than coming up with solutions to assist the minority from falling into the traps of "easy" suicide & "blood" money which ruins futures and breaks families beyond recognition. I take my hat off to you because you have opened my eyes wider than they have been in a long time. You're a gifted writer & one hell of a storyteller! ;) CC
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WOW! You did your thang with this entry! I got so caught up in what you've written, I didn't even know I was at the end until I realized there were no more words left to read. What an excellent way expressing a very sensitive subject in a REAL & non threatening manner. To create a scene of a disc jockey & a radio station was genius! Its seems easier to place the blame on the majority of society than coming up with solutions to assist the minority from falling into the traps of "easy" suicide & "blood" money which ruins futures and breaks families beyond recognition. I take my hat off to you because you have opened my eyes wider than they have been in a long time. You're a gifted writer & one hell of a storyteller! ;) CC
Comment Written 12-Jul-2014
Comment from LIJ Red
Excellent approach, radio personality and callers, to justify dialog-only writing. This makes good use of dialect without getting carried away. As to content, the logic is solid.
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Excellent approach, radio personality and callers, to justify dialog-only writing. This makes good use of dialect without getting carried away. As to content, the logic is solid.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2014
Comment from CALLAHANMR
I really like this creative dialog on an important subject.I never knew about any gun that shot someone on it's own. Guns don't just show up in Chicago, The present culture demands guns"to protect themselves is the usual PC reason.
Your dialog places the blame clearly on an unruly sub-culture created by a lack of social structure.
Great contest entry. Good luck!
Roger
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I really like this creative dialog on an important subject.I never knew about any gun that shot someone on it's own. Guns don't just show up in Chicago, The present culture demands guns"to protect themselves is the usual PC reason.
Your dialog places the blame clearly on an unruly sub-culture created by a lack of social structure.
Great contest entry. Good luck!
Roger
Comment Written 11-Jul-2014
