Shepherd
Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "Want"poems inspired by Psalm 23
33 total reviews
Comment from adewpearl
I like your rhyming and proximate rhyming of stronger/squander all in good triolet pattern
excellent use of the triolet's repeating lines
I particularly like the A line
I have always liked this Bible story, and you retell it in such a meaningful way, cutting right to the message in such a thoughtful poetic way :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2014
I like your rhyming and proximate rhyming of stronger/squander all in good triolet pattern
excellent use of the triolet's repeating lines
I particularly like the A line
I have always liked this Bible story, and you retell it in such a meaningful way, cutting right to the message in such a thoughtful poetic way :-) Brooke
Comment Written 15-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2014
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Oh, you are way too speedy for me, Brooke. I meant to have something up so you could get some points and bucks.
Thank you for an encouraging review and very kind comments. I wasn't sure I liked that much repetition in so few lines, but I wanted to try a triolet and this simple story seemed to fit.
I too find this Bible story intriguing. We only get a momentary glimpse into the widow's life and then are left to wonder at her fate and her great faith. Maybe that is part of the allure.
Have a great day. Debi
Comment from 9999pool
A great Triolet with a strong message of faith. This woman gave everything she had because her faith is stronger than her need for food with money. She believed wholeheartedly that with Christ in her hearts and mind, she can overcome poverty even if it means starving in a cause she believed to be right.
Great write and well pen.
Cheerio, hugs, Ritchie. :)) Blessings.
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2014
A great Triolet with a strong message of faith. This woman gave everything she had because her faith is stronger than her need for food with money. She believed wholeheartedly that with Christ in her hearts and mind, she can overcome poverty even if it means starving in a cause she believed to be right.
Great write and well pen.
Cheerio, hugs, Ritchie. :)) Blessings.
Comment Written 15-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2014
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Thank you for kind comments and analysis. I appreciate the encouragement. Debi
Comment from Dean Kuch
Mark 12: 41-44 are great biblical scriptures advocating giving freely and from the heart. Your poem encapsulates those bible verses, and spins a tale of giving all its own.
Nicely done, w,j.debi.
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2014
Mark 12: 41-44 are great biblical scriptures advocating giving freely and from the heart. Your poem encapsulates those bible verses, and spins a tale of giving all its own.
Nicely done, w,j.debi.
Comment Written 11-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2014
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Thank you for the encouraging review, Dean. I am happy you enjoyed it. debi
Comment from c_lucas
This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very interesting read. There is good imagery and descriptive scheme.
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2014
This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very interesting read. There is good imagery and descriptive scheme.
Comment Written 11-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2014
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Thank you for the great review. I am so pleased you enjoyed it. Debi
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You're welcome, Debi. Charlie
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Your poem brings the parable alive. I enjoyed reading it. It touched my heart and was very emotional. You did a great job writing this poem.
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2014
Your poem brings the parable alive. I enjoyed reading it. It touched my heart and was very emotional. You did a great job writing this poem.
Comment Written 11-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2014
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Thank you for such encouraging comments. I am so happy you enjoyed reading it. Debi
Comment from Righteous Riter
Good description the paints a clear picture in my mind and allow me to feel the emotion within the words. Good alliteration with want/was...strong/stronger. Love it, love it, love it. To God be the glory.
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2014
Good description the paints a clear picture in my mind and allow me to feel the emotion within the words. Good alliteration with want/was...strong/stronger. Love it, love it, love it. To God be the glory.
Comment Written 11-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2014
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Wow! Thank you for the very generous six stars, Righteous Riter. I am happy you enjoyed reading my little piece. This is one of my favorite stories. Your comment, "Love it, love it, love it," just makes my day! Thank you! Debi
Comment from nancy_e_davis
This is a well written triolet WJ. I didn't realize it was a triolet until I read your notes. That is something that 's hard to do. Hide the repeat lines. Very well done. Nancy
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2014
This is a well written triolet WJ. I didn't realize it was a triolet until I read your notes. That is something that 's hard to do. Hide the repeat lines. Very well done. Nancy
Comment Written 10-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2014
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Hi Nancy,
That is about the best compliment I could hope to receive. You made my evening brighter. Thank you! Debi
Comment from TAB_that's me
I love the triolet form and you did a great job. I like the repeating lines that you choose. This is a strong poem of faith.
Teresa
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2014
I love the triolet form and you did a great job. I like the repeating lines that you choose. This is a strong poem of faith.
Teresa
Comment Written 10-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2014
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Thank you, Teresa. If you love the triolet form then you must know it well. I am flattered that you liked this one. Thank you for the encouraging review. Debi.
Comment from GWHARGIS
This was a great first one, if I read your author notes correctly. I like the subtle biblical feel in this. The rhyming was good and the message was clear yet not preachy. nicely done.
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2014
This was a great first one, if I read your author notes correctly. I like the subtle biblical feel in this. The rhyming was good and the message was clear yet not preachy. nicely done.
Comment Written 10-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2014
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Thank you, Gwhargis. This is such encouraging feedback. I love that you did not find it preachy and liked the message. Such a wonderful compliment. Thank you for making me smile. Debi
Comment from GracieAnn
w.j., this is a wonderful rendition of the treasured biblical story. The title is an apt description of the way God delivers when we are in need. Well done. :0 GracieAnn
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2014
w.j., this is a wonderful rendition of the treasured biblical story. The title is an apt description of the way God delivers when we are in need. Well done. :0 GracieAnn
Comment Written 10-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 10-Jun-2014
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Thank you for the encouraging comments, GracieAnn. I am happy you enjoyed it and appreciate your kindness. Debi