Comment from Selina Stambi

Excellent

Hello Adi,


Nice rhyme in this piece. A slight re-arrange of the lines, for you to consider, okay?

It/ be/gan/ in/ May/(five syllables)
And/ it/ all/ end/ed/ in/ lots/ of/ hay(.) (Nine syllables in this line)
(I)t/ was/ the/ whole/ day/ (five syllables)


Very well done, Adi! I'm assuming you're in grade six now, not grade four?

Sonali :)

 Comment Written 22-Oct-2015

Comment from TAB_that's me

Good

Your first line is supposed to have 5 syllables but it has six. If you take out the "and" word and the end it would be fine.
teresa

 Comment Written 09-May-2014

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reply by the author on 21-May-2014

thanks

Comment from donette1914

Excellent

Very cute little poem and it all rhymed and you made this come to life, of hay in may the whole day. very creative and well written it was a pleasure

 Comment Written 08-May-2014

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reply by the author on 21-May-2014

thanks