Walk With Me.
Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "A Cruel Twist of Fate."From victim to survivor of abuse.
18 total reviews
Comment from 9999pool
Her life is such a bitter sweet one. Living away from the father is not the best of options but under the cirumstances there is no choice. Without friends except for school mates, she live a pretty lonely life.
Then the big break came and she is selected to perform a maypole dance and needs a new dress. So sweet of the mother to sew her a new dress using the Singer brand sewing machine but this turns out nor to be such a good idea.
Mom never sewn in her life before and with darts sewn on the outside, she becomes the center of atraction from gigling children.
Can we help but laugh at this bitter sweeet scenario? Will she ever regain her self esteem?
The story line was genuine and believable as the mother is under stress and on medication and ontop of that mom never sewn in her life before. Childhood days can be a bad experience but hopefully she has found a better life now as a writer perhaps?
Though I seldom review stories because my mind does drift, this one had my attention from beginning to end and left me with a bitter sweet moment about life as a child under varying circumstances for others.
Excellent work. Well done! Bravo!
Nice self pic too, smiles.
Cheerio, hugs and luv, Ritchie. :))
P.S. Wouldn't mind reading Part 2 of this story if you are writing one, smiles. Maybe call it "Bitter Sweet Moments"?
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2013
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Her life is such a bitter sweet one. Living away from the father is not the best of options but under the cirumstances there is no choice. Without friends except for school mates, she live a pretty lonely life.
Then the big break came and she is selected to perform a maypole dance and needs a new dress. So sweet of the mother to sew her a new dress using the Singer brand sewing machine but this turns out nor to be such a good idea.
Mom never sewn in her life before and with darts sewn on the outside, she becomes the center of atraction from gigling children.
Can we help but laugh at this bitter sweeet scenario? Will she ever regain her self esteem?
The story line was genuine and believable as the mother is under stress and on medication and ontop of that mom never sewn in her life before. Childhood days can be a bad experience but hopefully she has found a better life now as a writer perhaps?
Though I seldom review stories because my mind does drift, this one had my attention from beginning to end and left me with a bitter sweet moment about life as a child under varying circumstances for others.
Excellent work. Well done! Bravo!
Nice self pic too, smiles.
Cheerio, hugs and luv, Ritchie. :))
P.S. Wouldn't mind reading Part 2 of this story if you are writing one, smiles. Maybe call it "Bitter Sweet Moments"?
Comment Written 19-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2013
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Thank you so much for this detailed review.
I appreciate the fact that you made an exception to read my story.
Life isn't always easy and some children have more than their fair share of these moments.
I have written another story titled "Loser" which I have previously posted but not promoted. I will re-post it next.
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Hi dear,
Don't worry about the promotion. i am used to 2 cent read as long as the content captivates my imagination, smiles. I will go look for it later and read the story. Smiles.
Cheerio, hugs, Ritchie. :))
Have a great Thanksgiving and get together to make up for lost time, smiles.
Comment from c_lucas
A child soon finds out its parents short coming. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good readl. Good job.
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2013
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A child soon finds out its parents short coming. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good readl. Good job.
Comment Written 19-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2013
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Thank you fo a generous review.
I am glad that you enjoyed this story for this little girl was...me.
Comment from ericawrites
This is a really good story, which could easily be fleshed out some more, adding dialogue, clearer picture of the characters, the scene, thoughts from the little girl, names etc.
As this is non-fiction, I'm guessing it is autobiographical, in which case you had a really tough time growing up. I can identify with much of your story.
Well done and thank you for sharing this.
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2013
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This is a really good story, which could easily be fleshed out some more, adding dialogue, clearer picture of the characters, the scene, thoughts from the little girl, names etc.
As this is non-fiction, I'm guessing it is autobiographical, in which case you had a really tough time growing up. I can identify with much of your story.
Well done and thank you for sharing this.
Comment Written 19-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2013
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Thank you.
I appreciate your review and supportive comments.
Comment from Sankey
Thanks for sharing. What a pity the Mum had no one she could turn to, to help make the dress nice.
Well done. Very expressive and full of truth. Good work.
NO SPAGS.
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2013
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Thanks for sharing. What a pity the Mum had no one she could turn to, to help make the dress nice.
Well done. Very expressive and full of truth. Good work.
NO SPAGS.
Comment Written 19-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2013
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Thanks for reviewing with compassion.
I appreciate your thoughtful comments.
Comment from Mai Mai
What an adorable picture! This is an interesting piece.
There may be some that criticize the manner you choose to relate this story. Be it accurate or slightly embellished matters not, it is a very good story. I've heard that we shouldn't tell, we should show. Sometimes our hearts tell us to tell and so we do. Do not let anyone tell you you told this story wrong. Unlike many other stories, I completely understood this story. It is a very touching story and it is a very powerful story. It is well told and well written.
As for the poem, I like it.
Very well done and good luck.
Mai Mai
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2013
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What an adorable picture! This is an interesting piece.
There may be some that criticize the manner you choose to relate this story. Be it accurate or slightly embellished matters not, it is a very good story. I've heard that we shouldn't tell, we should show. Sometimes our hearts tell us to tell and so we do. Do not let anyone tell you you told this story wrong. Unlike many other stories, I completely understood this story. It is a very touching story and it is a very powerful story. It is well told and well written.
As for the poem, I like it.
Very well done and good luck.
Mai Mai
Comment Written 19-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2013
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Thanks for your lovely review and kind comments.
I appreciate your time and your support for
individual expression.
Comment from Princesseunice
Hmmm, a nicely written story.
Good haiku poem too. Only that that the little girl's esteem is not gone.
The story tells of what a litte caring can do.
well done.
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2013
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Hmmm, a nicely written story.
Good haiku poem too. Only that that the little girl's esteem is not gone.
The story tells of what a litte caring can do.
well done.
Comment Written 19-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2013
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Thank you for a generous review.
I appreciate your time and comments.
Comment from jmdg1954
Children are born innocent. They do not know or understand right from wrong, good from bad or yes from no. They unknowingly rely on the parent to instruct and teach them. Therein begins the problem. The downward spiral.
Story is well told. John
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2013
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Children are born innocent. They do not know or understand right from wrong, good from bad or yes from no. They unknowingly rely on the parent to instruct and teach them. Therein begins the problem. The downward spiral.
Story is well told. John
Comment Written 19-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2013
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Thank you for a thoughtful review.
I appreciate your time and comments.
Comment from Selina Stambi
A touching story - and so nicely told - the poem at the end is a stylish sign off.
I particularly appreciated the font - thank you. :)
Well done, Seken!
Love,
xxx
Sonali
(C)atholic private school
machine and is soon finished the dress... and the dress is soon finished ... ?
reply by the author on 18-Nov-2013
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A touching story - and so nicely told - the poem at the end is a stylish sign off.
I particularly appreciated the font - thank you. :)
Well done, Seken!
Love,
xxx
Sonali
(C)atholic private school
machine and is soon finished the dress... and the dress is soon finished ... ?
Comment Written 18-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 18-Nov-2013
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Thank you for a positive review.
I appreciate your time and detailed comments.
Thanks for spotting the glitches.
Comment from Dean Kuch
Oh well, at least her mother actually made an attempt to do something nice for her daughter, which is far more than she'd been doing.
Poor kid, children can be some of the most vicious and cruel people, sometimes. The levels to which they'll stoop to embarrass and harass another kid defies all logical expalnations.
I was happy at the end for the little girl. She deserved at least that much for participating.
Nice job, seken58.
reply by the author on 18-Nov-2013
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Oh well, at least her mother actually made an attempt to do something nice for her daughter, which is far more than she'd been doing.
Poor kid, children can be some of the most vicious and cruel people, sometimes. The levels to which they'll stoop to embarrass and harass another kid defies all logical expalnations.
I was happy at the end for the little girl. She deserved at least that much for participating.
Nice job, seken58.
Comment Written 18-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 18-Nov-2013
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Thank you very much for a lovely review.
I appreciate your compassionate and caring comments far more than you know for that little girl...was me.
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You are always welcome, seken58...
Comment from elchupakabra
I enjoyed this contest entry, I thought it was an excellent social commentary piece about acceptance and class distinction. I thought the prose was well written and the 5-7-5 that followed was a solid short poem that fit well with the story. Great work on this write, thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 18-Nov-2013
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I enjoyed this contest entry, I thought it was an excellent social commentary piece about acceptance and class distinction. I thought the prose was well written and the 5-7-5 that followed was a solid short poem that fit well with the story. Great work on this write, thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 18-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 18-Nov-2013
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Thank you so much for your generous review.
I appreciate your time and comments.
