Jealously
Jealously is becoming a problem in the relationship15 total reviews
Comment from elchupakabra
Good assonance in the last two lines of the first stanza. Good work maintaining a tight rhyme scheme and good flow between lines. You make good allusions to your overall theme, and I like the way the color and illustration accentuate it as well. Great work overall here.
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2013
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Good assonance in the last two lines of the first stanza. Good work maintaining a tight rhyme scheme and good flow between lines. You make good allusions to your overall theme, and I like the way the color and illustration accentuate it as well. Great work overall here.
Comment Written 13-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2013
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Thank you for your great review on the poem Jealously I appreciate it. Mary
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
This is a well written poem in good rhyming couplets. If this is fact then I feel sorry for you as jealousy - the green eyed monster can be a big problem in a relationship. If non-fiction then you have written a good poem. Your author notes suggest it is fact. Good Luck. And good luck in the contest. Regards Dorothy
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2013
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This is a well written poem in good rhyming couplets. If this is fact then I feel sorry for you as jealousy - the green eyed monster can be a big problem in a relationship. If non-fiction then you have written a good poem. Your author notes suggest it is fact. Good Luck. And good luck in the contest. Regards Dorothy
Comment Written 13-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2013
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Thanks Dorothy a great view .it was me many moons ago thankfully not now. This was written before the contest came about. I entered I will change so this was not in a competition Thanks again Mary
Comment from Tomes Johnston
This is an interesting poem that is cunningly crafted by the author. This is a thought provoking piece of writing that the writer tells the reader. This is a well-written poem.
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2013
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This is an interesting poem that is cunningly crafted by the author. This is a thought provoking piece of writing that the writer tells the reader. This is a well-written poem.
Comment Written 13-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 13-Aug-2013
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Thank you for the lovely review. I appreciate it. Mary
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It was my pleasure.
Comment from c_lucas
Neither will change when deep into the game. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a good read. Good luck in your contest.
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2013
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Neither will change when deep into the game. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a good read. Good luck in your contest.
Comment Written 12-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2013
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Thank you for the review and the kind comments.
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You're welcome.
Comment from Ridley Williams
Jealous husbands are dealing from a point of no trust, I believe, and living with a person that doesn't trust you is a dead end street. Change is possible, but seldom occurs.
Great prompt entry. Good luck in the contest, Ridley
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2013
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Jealous husbands are dealing from a point of no trust, I believe, and living with a person that doesn't trust you is a dead end street. Change is possible, but seldom occurs.
Great prompt entry. Good luck in the contest, Ridley
Comment Written 12-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2013
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Thanks for the positive comments about my poem Jealously.
Comment from adewpearl
solid use of rhyming couplets
You portray the speaker's conflicted feelings well - marry a man one loves or break it up with him because of his controlling jealousy - I'd go with breaking it off because if he's that jealous before marriage, just think what might kick in once he thinks he "owns" her
Brooke
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2013
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solid use of rhyming couplets
You portray the speaker's conflicted feelings well - marry a man one loves or break it up with him because of his controlling jealousy - I'd go with breaking it off because if he's that jealous before marriage, just think what might kick in once he thinks he "owns" her
Brooke
Comment Written 12-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2013
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thanks for your comments and generous rating. Mary
Comment from gudbjorg
About your poem about jealousy I feel it is very sad that people confuse jealousy with real love. The world teaches that but it's so contrary to the spirit of real love that offers trust, giving and, thus, liberty. Because of human nature, it's not always that easy to practice but, with God's help, all things are possible and many a beautiful relationship can result without anyone intentionally getting hurt.
A marriage that excludes friendship with others is a bondage that traps a soul in a box. Our souls have to be free to be happy and to share that happiness with others is a natural desire. I'm sure that God never intended that kind of prison in marriage but rather a trust and love-filled relationship that reaches out to others to bring them into a wider circle of friendship. A marvellous poem that has a beautiful flow and a good rhyme and rhythm. Well done!
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2013
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About your poem about jealousy I feel it is very sad that people confuse jealousy with real love. The world teaches that but it's so contrary to the spirit of real love that offers trust, giving and, thus, liberty. Because of human nature, it's not always that easy to practice but, with God's help, all things are possible and many a beautiful relationship can result without anyone intentionally getting hurt.
A marriage that excludes friendship with others is a bondage that traps a soul in a box. Our souls have to be free to be happy and to share that happiness with others is a natural desire. I'm sure that God never intended that kind of prison in marriage but rather a trust and love-filled relationship that reaches out to others to bring them into a wider circle of friendship. A marvellous poem that has a beautiful flow and a good rhyme and rhythm. Well done!
Comment Written 12-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 12-Aug-2013
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thank you for the lovely positive comments about the poem Jealously, and everything you said it true, it was I who was a victim, but thankfully I managed to be my own person after some years, of suffering but the change did take place and all is fine now. Mary.
Comment from Darkhorse555
Sitting looking out at the ocean deep in thought jealousy like a virus eats away a deep insecurity trust your inner voice as you drew a picture lovely piece god bless
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2013
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Sitting looking out at the ocean deep in thought jealousy like a virus eats away a deep insecurity trust your inner voice as you drew a picture lovely piece god bless
Comment Written 11-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2013
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Thank you for the review and your comments I appreciate it. Mary
Comment from Matoshka
This is a powerful message and your emotions show through with doubt and sadness. I can feel the love you have for him, sometimes tho they become controllers. I enjoyed this very much and pray the Lord gives you an answer. Blessings and good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2013
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This is a powerful message and your emotions show through with doubt and sadness. I can feel the love you have for him, sometimes tho they become controllers. I enjoyed this very much and pray the Lord gives you an answer. Blessings and good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 10-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2013
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Thank you for the wonderful review. I am happy you felt it was a good poem. Mary
Comment from Evelyn Fort Stewart
It is definitely a spirit I would run from now that I have lived through the destruction of it. i spent 32 years being kept away from family and friends and was abused more times than I can remember. it's all in my book, Behind Closed Doors on amazon.com. This definitely struck a chord with me. God loves you and so do I.
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2013
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It is definitely a spirit I would run from now that I have lived through the destruction of it. i spent 32 years being kept away from family and friends and was abused more times than I can remember. it's all in my book, Behind Closed Doors on amazon.com. This definitely struck a chord with me. God loves you and so do I.
Comment Written 10-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2013
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I thank you for taking the time to review, indeed I am aware of you story on Fanstory which I am following, Good luck with your book.
and thanks for the comments. Mary