My Life in words
Viewing comments for Chapter 96 "Nemesis no more."All of my poems of release.
13 total reviews
Comment from Indie Skreet
clever stuff again and indeed nothing to criticise. I have noticed many on fanstory have no idea how to present their work as regards to illustration. Much I pass purely due to the way they do so, but you have this down to a fine art too. I prefer to use words only to illustrate my own, as I want to be able to pack a powerful enough punch independently. I am beginning to wonder if that is wise. I have some great illustrations, so I think I will add to the archived ones and continue like that :)
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2013
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clever stuff again and indeed nothing to criticise. I have noticed many on fanstory have no idea how to present their work as regards to illustration. Much I pass purely due to the way they do so, but you have this down to a fine art too. I prefer to use words only to illustrate my own, as I want to be able to pack a powerful enough punch independently. I am beginning to wonder if that is wise. I have some great illustrations, so I think I will add to the archived ones and continue like that :)
Comment Written 16-Mar-2013
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2013
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Look forward to seeing them Indie, but your words do pack a punch as is girlie. :) xx
Comment from RJ
I enjoyed your poem and the picture went well with it. The words flowed well with good description. I am not familiar with Fiboancci, but did not see anything to change here. Thank you for sharing. RJ
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2012
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I enjoyed your poem and the picture went well with it. The words flowed well with good description. I am not familiar with Fiboancci, but did not see anything to change here. Thank you for sharing. RJ
Comment Written 30-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2012
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RJ, thank you so much for your kind words and review. Have a great New Year :) Jaq x
Comment from adewpearl
Your poem is in excellent syllable count and structure for the Fib
I like the alliterative grouping of Siren/seafarers/song
I like the simile and the attitude of the determined speaker :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2012
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Your poem is in excellent syllable count and structure for the Fib
I like the alliterative grouping of Siren/seafarers/song
I like the simile and the attitude of the determined speaker :-) Brooke
Comment Written 29-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2012
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Thank you so much for your detailed and kind review Brooke :) Jaq x
Comment from Earl of Oxford
Hi, Jaq.
I can't offer any constructive critique, as I never heard of this form.
I'm not a fan of many syllable-restrictive forms, as I don';t see the point, unless the lines are all longer, say of 6, 8 or 10 syllables, as often the writer forces the lines to meet the count, but you've done a fine job here, and also expressed your sadness at how you were mistreated after being lulled by romance.
Best wishes, Ray
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2012
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Hi, Jaq.
I can't offer any constructive critique, as I never heard of this form.
I'm not a fan of many syllable-restrictive forms, as I don';t see the point, unless the lines are all longer, say of 6, 8 or 10 syllables, as often the writer forces the lines to meet the count, but you've done a fine job here, and also expressed your sadness at how you were mistreated after being lulled by romance.
Best wishes, Ray
Comment Written 29-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2012
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Thank you so much for reading this Ray. It was just an attempt at a new style. I've tried a Triolet lately too. :) Jaq xx
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Thanks for your gracious reply, Jaq.
After a couple of breaks away latekly, I'm miles behind onsite. I therefore just reviewed one from each of those I'm following, and I deleted the other notifications, as otherwiise I'd never catch up and reviewing would become a chore.
Happy NY to you and yours. Love, Ray xx
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Right back at ya Ray. I hope you and yours have a great New Year and a brilliant 2013. Will be good to see you back on more regularly :) Jaq xx
Comment from Gungalo
You don't need any help you for you have done it flawlessly. It's gorgeous and has a real meaning to it also. Wonderful JC and great going.
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2012
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You don't need any help you for you have done it flawlessly. It's gorgeous and has a real meaning to it also. Wonderful JC and great going.
Comment Written 29-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2012
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Thank you so much for your very kind review and for inspiring me to try new styles. :) Jaq x
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You did great JC.
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Thank you for your kindness xx
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Smile
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
This is very well written my friend true to form I have never attempted this form one day I will when I get time well done my friend regards Jill
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2012
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This is very well written my friend true to form I have never attempted this form one day I will when I get time well done my friend regards Jill
Comment Written 29-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2012
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Thanks Jill I enjoyed trying it. Your reviews are always appreciated my friend. :) Jaq x
Comment from Spike the second
Hi Jaq
This so well done. I see Gungalo had posted one in a while back and put in the equations. I thought 236 syllables was really hard but it goes on to thousands.
Very well done and a super poem Jaq.
Blessings
Spike
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2012
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Hi Jaq
This so well done. I see Gungalo had posted one in a while back and put in the equations. I thought 236 syllables was really hard but it goes on to thousands.
Very well done and a super poem Jaq.
Blessings
Spike
Comment Written 29-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2012
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Thank you so much Spike, it was because of the one Gungalo posted that I thought I'd try it out. Hope your festivities are going well with the family. God Bless you, :) Jaq x
Comment from October21
Hi Jaq! It's always a pleasure to be reviewing your work:) Great job with this format- though I've never tried it out, it seems so complicated. Yet you grasp the concept so tightly and display the meaning excellently- a hard thing to do when you're watching out for syllable counts left right and centre:) Glad their strength prevailed at the end- excellent choice of words here. Sometimes resisting the charm is difficult to do and it resembles great power and will. They say that when one comes to their end, their life flashes before their eyes- the siren was a similar mark to this and brilliantly original. Not only did this give me loads to think about but I thought the artwork was a fantastic choice as it shows the importance of being in a position of power at the end of one's life. It is rare when a poet can use words to mirror the image and have them bursting with meaning too.
Great job, a very interesting piece with a skillful form:)
It was a pleasure reading,
Take care my friend,
Shen
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2012
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Hi Jaq! It's always a pleasure to be reviewing your work:) Great job with this format- though I've never tried it out, it seems so complicated. Yet you grasp the concept so tightly and display the meaning excellently- a hard thing to do when you're watching out for syllable counts left right and centre:) Glad their strength prevailed at the end- excellent choice of words here. Sometimes resisting the charm is difficult to do and it resembles great power and will. They say that when one comes to their end, their life flashes before their eyes- the siren was a similar mark to this and brilliantly original. Not only did this give me loads to think about but I thought the artwork was a fantastic choice as it shows the importance of being in a position of power at the end of one's life. It is rare when a poet can use words to mirror the image and have them bursting with meaning too.
Great job, a very interesting piece with a skillful form:)
It was a pleasure reading,
Take care my friend,
Shen
Comment Written 29-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2012
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Thank you so much for your very detailed and brilliant review Shenel my wee friend. Glad you liked it :) Jaq x
Comment from Scribbler67
This little poem, in such an unusual format, was a pleasure to read. This expression of triumph, is itself a triumph, and you are to be congratulated. I think it would have been quite easy to lose the context of the words while concentrating on the Fibonacci Sequence, but you have handled it admirably. Well done.
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2012
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This little poem, in such an unusual format, was a pleasure to read. This expression of triumph, is itself a triumph, and you are to be congratulated. I think it would have been quite easy to lose the context of the words while concentrating on the Fibonacci Sequence, but you have handled it admirably. Well done.
Comment Written 29-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2012
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Thank you for your very kind review Scribbler67. :) Jaq x
Comment from JM daSilva
Wow, so it means that you did not give in to enchantment right? Was the person not charming enough, or was it something unrelated to charm? Many times I find myself liking a person very much because of physical attributes, but then... they open their mouths and the charm dissipates.
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2012
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Wow, so it means that you did not give in to enchantment right? Was the person not charming enough, or was it something unrelated to charm? Many times I find myself liking a person very much because of physical attributes, but then... they open their mouths and the charm dissipates.
Comment Written 29-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 29-Dec-2012
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Unfortunately his charm was a blind for more sinister traits. Thanks for your review. Aesthetics are not all they are cracked up to be. :) Jaq x
