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Bottom of the Loch

Viewing comments for Chapter 12 "The Mid-wife helps"
Parents die, so she moves in with unknown family

8 total reviews 
Comment from krprice
Excellent
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Good chapter with good dialogue. At least, Sara realizes something is different about this child. I hope they don't all faint away when it comes out.

Karlene

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2010

reply by the author on 21-Jun-2010
    thank you so much, working to get this caught up
Comment from Tellis
Excellent
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Yikes! Two month gestation is pretty quick. I hope Nick comes back to her soon so she isn't all alone. Except for Gramps that is.

Tellis

 Comment Written 17-Jun-2010

reply by the author on 21-Jun-2010
    so true, can you amagine
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Excellent
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Sara thought, as she got ready to leave on her way once more, (This sentence implies thought so a period after more and the no quotations only italics.)

I guess the incubation period for octopus is only two months. Who would have known.

 Comment Written 16-Jun-2010

reply by the author on 21-Jun-2010
    guess this is wierd huh
Comment from Readywriter52
Excellent
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Bonnie is getting ready for the baby. However, she is puzzled that the baby is due so soon. Sara seems a little concerned. She feels there is something different with the baby.

 Comment Written 16-Jun-2010

reply by the author on 21-Jun-2010
    thank you, you will see
Comment from dportwood
Excellent
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wierdgrace,

Nice way to develop a story. I enjoyed reading this chapter

I did notice this:

she was only two month along
she was only two months along

Duane

 Comment Written 16-Jun-2010

reply by the author on 16-Jun-2010
    thank you I will do my best to fix
Comment from ulster3
Excellent
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Hello my friend, wierdgrace.
This is a suspensful read. The time frame is a great mystery. You have so many thoughts turning in your imaginative mind, which is very good for us who read your work.
Fondly, Rebecca

 Comment Written 16-Jun-2010

reply by the author on 16-Jun-2010
    more to come, hope I can post again soon
Comment from Catmusings
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I love the character of Sara who just leaps to life in my mind. I'm intrigued by the whole story of this midwife and the people she encounters and want to read more.

Good writing that really draws the reader in.

 Comment Written 16-Jun-2010

reply by the author on 16-Jun-2010
    so glad, your the best....
Comment from jdiderrich
Good
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I can feel a story in this piece, some mystery, some inkling of a climax to come. The conversation still leaves me confused sometimes - wondering who is talking and about whom, but I got more from this piece than the last. Keep them coming. :~)

 Comment Written 16-Jun-2010

reply by the author on 16-Jun-2010
    sorry, I thought it was wrong when I posted, will check on it later.