CSP: A Collection of Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 9 "Another Statistic"A collection of poetry
20 total reviews
Comment from Joan E.
I have been back from Borneo for almost a week and haven't seen anything posted by you. I hope you too are on vacation and will have lots to write about when you return, because I miss your good work.
In this cinquain you quickly capture the disintegration of a relationship. I also enjoyed your use of alliteration and what I'm guessing is your friend's artwork.
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I have been back from Borneo for almost a week and haven't seen anything posted by you. I hope you too are on vacation and will have lots to write about when you return, because I miss your good work.
In this cinquain you quickly capture the disintegration of a relationship. I also enjoyed your use of alliteration and what I'm guessing is your friend's artwork.
Comment Written 30-May-2009
Comment from MJMuraco
Nice job on this cinquain. I find it amazing that you have such ability to write poems under such strict rules. I still haven't had the nerve to try writing one.
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Nice job on this cinquain. I find it amazing that you have such ability to write poems under such strict rules. I still haven't had the nerve to try writing one.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2009
Comment from FredCollingwood
Sure, it's simple to you. I don't think I could even spell ciquwayne, or what ever it is. I liked it though. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 06-Apr-2009
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Sure, it's simple to you. I don't think I could even spell ciquwayne, or what ever it is. I liked it though. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 02-Apr-2009
reply by the author on 06-Apr-2009
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You ALMOST spelled it! HA! Thanks so much for your great review, Fred. Warmest regards, Sue
Comment from jaeladarling
Perfect poem for this contest - I know you'll do well! You always amaze me at how well you fit words into all these different poetry styles. Maybe one day I'll take my cue from you and go out on a limb. :) Thanks for sharing and good luck!
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Perfect poem for this contest - I know you'll do well! You always amaze me at how well you fit words into all these different poetry styles. Maybe one day I'll take my cue from you and go out on a limb. :) Thanks for sharing and good luck!
Comment Written 01-Apr-2009
Comment from c_lucas
A relationship that can last through hard times is a true one. Most cracked. Very well written with good imagery and descriptive scheme.
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A relationship that can last through hard times is a true one. Most cracked. Very well written with good imagery and descriptive scheme.
Comment Written 01-Apr-2009
Comment from amada
It has s sense of destruction or desolation, this lines are well inspired. Another statistic can be applied to many things, we all have one of our own.
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It has s sense of destruction or desolation, this lines are well inspired. Another statistic can be applied to many things, we all have one of our own.
Comment Written 01-Apr-2009
Comment from words
Loved the title of this: Another Statistic....it worked to give the verse another spin!
How many hopes and dreams have been crushed by the death of the simple little word:Thought we were 'forever'
Good job.
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Loved the title of this: Another Statistic....it worked to give the verse another spin!
How many hopes and dreams have been crushed by the death of the simple little word:Thought we were 'forever'
Good job.
Comment Written 01-Apr-2009
Comment from Domino
Hi, Sue, I wouldn't blame you for ignoring me. I know what you're implying in clever metaphor at the end with the waters seeping through/crying, but maybe something a little more original like, 'Tears flood' or something like?
It's sadly top notch as it is. Love, Ray xx
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2009
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Hi, Sue, I wouldn't blame you for ignoring me. I know what you're implying in clever metaphor at the end with the waters seeping through/crying, but maybe something a little more original like, 'Tears flood' or something like?
It's sadly top notch as it is. Love, Ray xx
Comment Written 01-Apr-2009
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2009
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Ray, nah...I won't ignore you. But, not gonna change the line either! LMAO!!! I purposefully wanted to bookend the verse with opposites. But, thanks MUCH for caring!! Sue :-))
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Fair play, Sue.
So long as I'm not 'ignored' - my worst nightmare! LOL xx
Comment from findingmyroom
Sue, nice framing of the body with the two 2-syllable lines that oppose each other. The feeling of surprise and sadness that forever maybe wasn't after all is nicely conveyed.
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Sue, nice framing of the body with the two 2-syllable lines that oppose each other. The feeling of surprise and sadness that forever maybe wasn't after all is nicely conveyed.
Comment Written 01-Apr-2009
Comment from NightWriter
"Another Statistic" is a well written cinquain poem that reads smooth with perfect rhythm and syllables from beginning to end. Good job.
reply by the author on 06-Apr-2009
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"Another Statistic" is a well written cinquain poem that reads smooth with perfect rhythm and syllables from beginning to end. Good job.
Comment Written 01-Apr-2009
reply by the author on 06-Apr-2009
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NightWriter, so glad you enjoyed this piece. And thank you very much for your excellent review. With regards, Sue :-))