CSP: A Collection of Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 15 "Betrayal"A collection of poetry
41 total reviews
Comment from Counting Carrots
Again, another contest entry that adheres strictly to the requirements. However, I don't feel had the power that you evoked with your train poem. I didn't really get this line (but then again this may be my problem! It usually is,...)
Burdens meant for the core
Could you make your meaning clearer in any way. I understand it may not be possible whilst still adhering to the rules, in which case, feel free to ignore my terribly ignorant comment.
Good work :)
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Again, another contest entry that adheres strictly to the requirements. However, I don't feel had the power that you evoked with your train poem. I didn't really get this line (but then again this may be my problem! It usually is,...)
Burdens meant for the core
Could you make your meaning clearer in any way. I understand it may not be possible whilst still adhering to the rules, in which case, feel free to ignore my terribly ignorant comment.
Good work :)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 29-Mar-2009
Comment from FredCollingwood
Betrayal is all of those things. Great poem writtin with difficult criteria. I think you'll do well in the contest. Good luck.
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Betrayal is all of those things. Great poem writtin with difficult criteria. I think you'll do well in the contest. Good luck.
Comment Written 29-Mar-2009
Comment from Nightwind1
Betrayal is the worst thing for me to deal with. It cuts to the core like a knife. The poem was spot on. Good luck in the contest.
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Betrayal is the worst thing for me to deal with. It cuts to the core like a knife. The poem was spot on. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 29-Mar-2009
Comment from jeslaf
Sue, this is a great contest entry; couldn't pass up a poem of this title! Loved the artwork, your choice of words, your rhyming final couplet. True, true. :)
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Sue, this is a great contest entry; couldn't pass up a poem of this title! Loved the artwork, your choice of words, your rhyming final couplet. True, true. :)
Comment Written 28-Mar-2009
Comment from bard owl
Beetrayal is one of the most hurtful actions in human interaction. To be betrayed is like the very core of trust has be defiled. Excellent contest entry, Sue. Best of luck. Blessings to you, Linda
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Beetrayal is one of the most hurtful actions in human interaction. To be betrayed is like the very core of trust has be defiled. Excellent contest entry, Sue. Best of luck. Blessings to you, Linda
Comment Written 28-Mar-2009
Comment from sherrygreywolf
Morning Sue - You've written a fine example of the Pleiades form. Everything is correct and I saw nothing that needs change.
Great work - sherry
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Morning Sue - You've written a fine example of the Pleiades form. Everything is correct and I saw nothing that needs change.
Great work - sherry
Comment Written 28-Mar-2009
Comment from nora arjuna
hi there, friend. thanks so much for joining this contest. as expected, an excellent entry from you. great subject chosen and all requirements met. wish you all the best!
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hi there, friend. thanks so much for joining this contest. as expected, an excellent entry from you. great subject chosen and all requirements met. wish you all the best!
Comment Written 28-Mar-2009
Comment from PUPA
Hi Sue,
The hurt of betrayal cannot be compared to any other, because there are bad intentions behind it. Your descriptive words expressed that word so well,
Good luck in the contest.
Pupa
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Hi Sue,
The hurt of betrayal cannot be compared to any other, because there are bad intentions behind it. Your descriptive words expressed that word so well,
Good luck in the contest.
Pupa
Comment Written 28-Mar-2009
Comment from pilarblue
Hello SixteezKid! This is yet another excellent poem authored by you that I truly enjoyed. Very nice and fitting presentation as well. :)
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Hello SixteezKid! This is yet another excellent poem authored by you that I truly enjoyed. Very nice and fitting presentation as well. :)
Comment Written 28-Mar-2009
Comment from MJMuraco
Sue, this poem is great and full of emotion about betrayal which is one of the most painful emotions a person can feel. It is interesting how every line starts with the same letter. You did a great job on following such a strict format. Mary Jayne
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Sue, this poem is great and full of emotion about betrayal which is one of the most painful emotions a person can feel. It is interesting how every line starts with the same letter. You did a great job on following such a strict format. Mary Jayne
Comment Written 27-Mar-2009