Erotic Erotica
Say it Ain't so JOe9 total reviews
Comment from T B Botts
Hello Tom,
well, unless things have changed, there are still things on the market to assist those of us who might need a push in the right direction. While I don't enjoy the bliss of marriage as frequently as I once did, now and then I still have a go at it. When I was reading your post, I was remembering the Seinfeld episode where George was swimming in the pool, the water was cold, and there was "significant" shrinkage. I can't use that excuse, as I don't have a pool. I think if I lost about thirty pounds though, my old friend would return to some of it's former glory.
Blessings,
Tom
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2025
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Hello Tom,
well, unless things have changed, there are still things on the market to assist those of us who might need a push in the right direction. While I don't enjoy the bliss of marriage as frequently as I once did, now and then I still have a go at it. When I was reading your post, I was remembering the Seinfeld episode where George was swimming in the pool, the water was cold, and there was "significant" shrinkage. I can't use that excuse, as I don't have a pool. I think if I lost about thirty pounds though, my old friend would return to some of it's former glory.
Blessings,
Tom
Comment Written 03-Feb-2025
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2025
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So... you're saying perhaps obesity stole the glamour from my paramour tour guide? :-O
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Hi Tom,
I believe that's what's happened to me. It's like living with a frightened turtle sometimes. It seems that I read that if we could get rid of that gut, we could at least somewhat represent what we used to be so proud of in our youth. That may not be the best reason to lose weight, but it certainly helps.
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Hey, the missus couldn't care an iota, and most likely is relieved I am ten years' senior to her. Furthermore, it's sad to think the highlight of my days is writing on this forum. My athleticism is g o n e. My friends have moved away, and now after being a single digit handicap golfer, I can't make a putt. I have gained 40 lbs in less than a year. and already had trouble seeing where my friend had been partially hidden.
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Hey Tom,
Unless I'm standing in the mirror and straining my eyes, it's hard to see. I'm hoping that as we move out of winter I'll be able to see some improvement in the weight department.
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I get it. That's why we installed side by side mirrors... to fit me in.
Comment from BethShelby
Well, I imagine there are quite a few gentlemen who could if they're being candid have written something similar. I applaud you on writing the modest version and leave the truly erotic version for your eyes only. Actually most of the real erotic writing comes from female writers and they are likely living vicariously by putting it in words.
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2025
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Well, I imagine there are quite a few gentlemen who could if they're being candid have written something similar. I applaud you on writing the modest version and leave the truly erotic version for your eyes only. Actually most of the real erotic writing comes from female writers and they are likely living vicariously by putting it in words.
Comment Written 01-Feb-2025
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2025
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I can believe what you have expressed
Comment from lancellot
I do not want to be that one person, but this really isn't erotica, or a story perse. It seems to the author telling with self-deprecating male "humor" why he cannot write an erotic story for the erotic writing contest, he entered.
Now, this short piece is well edited, but it repeats in its message, that there will no erotica in this post. Also, this is not Mature fiction. The warning wall isn't necessary.
I think it is fair to say this is a good entry. This is FanStory so the secret voters may (likely) this.
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2025
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I do not want to be that one person, but this really isn't erotica, or a story perse. It seems to the author telling with self-deprecating male "humor" why he cannot write an erotic story for the erotic writing contest, he entered.
Now, this short piece is well edited, but it repeats in its message, that there will no erotica in this post. Also, this is not Mature fiction. The warning wall isn't necessary.
I think it is fair to say this is a good entry. This is FanStory so the secret voters may (likely) this.
Comment Written 01-Feb-2025
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2025
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I get your drift. Naked boobs on asea is somewhat erotic.
I really wanted to add more but my followers in toto are much too conservative, and MORE salaciousness could have adverse consequences. Thanks for commenting.
I would have chosen humor but the contest dictated Adult.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Unfortunately age has this effect on men and they can no longer put into action the thoughts that are swimming in their heads, the look, but there is no response in the nether regions. You made me smile with your frank and amusing post, love Dolly x x x
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2025
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Unfortunately age has this effect on men and they can no longer put into action the thoughts that are swimming in their heads, the look, but there is no response in the nether regions. You made me smile with your frank and amusing post, love Dolly x x x
Comment Written 01-Feb-2025
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2025
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I can only say I stood amazed when the new year clock dropped then stopped in 2017 as did the wee-man you can guess where
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I can only say I stood amazed when the new year clock dropped then stopped in 2017 as did the wee-man you can guess where
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Well done.
the mouse in my slacks - the 'mouse'? Don't you mean gorilla, or at least the rat?
I'm going on 75 and I have hints, but not on the internet!
smiley face here
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2025
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Well done.
the mouse in my slacks - the 'mouse'? Don't you mean gorilla, or at least the rat?
I'm going on 75 and I have hints, but not on the internet!
smiley face here
Comment Written 01-Feb-2025
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2025
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Definitely more Capuchin then King Kong
Comment from Jessica Borras
You have a very quirky, kind of whimsical way with words that I very much enjoy. "Who I muse gets amused without remorse" and "delightful debauchery", phrases that sort of roll off the tongue. Thank you for sharing your inner thoughts, and best of luck with the contest!
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2025
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You have a very quirky, kind of whimsical way with words that I very much enjoy. "Who I muse gets amused without remorse" and "delightful debauchery", phrases that sort of roll off the tongue. Thank you for sharing your inner thoughts, and best of luck with the contest!
Comment Written 01-Feb-2025
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2025
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I try to be... different
I am stuck in the character's role
Comment from Bill Schott
This "erotica" will be viewed as suspect by those who jerk more than carrot growers and see these opportunities to ejaculate on paper like choking the chicken at Madison Garden. You are funny.
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2025
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This "erotica" will be viewed as suspect by those who jerk more than carrot growers and see these opportunities to ejaculate on paper like choking the chicken at Madison Garden. You are funny.
Comment Written 01-Feb-2025
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2025
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H... even I was suspect if this would sell as erotica
Thanks for opening the gate to Center Earth
Comment from Marilyn Hamilton
An excellent entry for the Erotic Writing Contest. Ah yes. There comes a time for all of us when just thinking about the possibility of a steamy encounter sends us for a nap. Life is funny that way,,,but not exactly funny haha. More like...well this part of life was unexpected, isn't that funny how much it sucks! Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2025
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An excellent entry for the Erotic Writing Contest. Ah yes. There comes a time for all of us when just thinking about the possibility of a steamy encounter sends us for a nap. Life is funny that way,,,but not exactly funny haha. More like...well this part of life was unexpected, isn't that funny how much it sucks! Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 01-Feb-2025
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2025
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Unexpected? Mine dropped on me like the meteor rushing earthward
Wham
I turned seventy, shriveled and got scorched as 71- 77 whizzed by
Comment from Jesse James Doty
Well, this is erotic but in a sad way. Losing the ability to get it up whenever you want to is sad and depressing, to say the least. I cannot relate since I still enjoy a full sexual life and I hope to never go there. I was hoping for some tantalizing treats of erotica but instead, I got a sadsack complaint of losing the ability to get a rise when you want to.
There were no typos or spags so I gave you a five.
Jesse
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2025
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Well, this is erotic but in a sad way. Losing the ability to get it up whenever you want to is sad and depressing, to say the least. I cannot relate since I still enjoy a full sexual life and I hope to never go there. I was hoping for some tantalizing treats of erotica but instead, I got a sadsack complaint of losing the ability to get a rise when you want to.
There were no typos or spags so I gave you a five.
Jesse
Comment Written 01-Feb-2025
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2025
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I wanted so badly to go astray but alas my id did a U-turn and I went for humor instead. Sorry to disappoint.
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It's okay, I'll live. At least you were honest.
Jesse
