Comment from Debbie D'Arcy

Excellent

Many congrats yet again, Shirley! Another great verse full of stunning, memorable imagery making this a very classy piece in all its poignancy and regret. I can see those scenes you paint all the way through and they sum up betrayal beautifully. Remind me never to bother to enter a contest when you're around (perhaps you could warn me!:)) Take care Debbie xx

 Comment Written 16-Oct-2024

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reply by the author on 17-Oct-2024

Haha, I can't master those 3 line little critters, though! Also ran nearly every time :) :) Thanks Debbie, you're always more than generous xx

Comment from Nicki Nance

Exceptional

You put a reader very close to the experience you describe. Your writing style is compelling. Sadly, your message is relatable to the masses. This one is a gem.

 Comment Written 14-Oct-2024

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reply by the author on 14-Oct-2024

Thank you, Nicki.

Comment from phill doran

Exceptional

Hello Anon,
This is a stark, sore, piece. If it is reality, well consider it the flower that grows from the excrement (not my first word-choice). However, I'd be even more impressed if it is an imagined piece.
Either way, great writing. "Suspicion stirred in morning tea..." is a lovely, dark, and very English line.
If it was up to me (which it isn't) you'd win your contest. I'm no great fan of the free form, but this proves the rule, and your dismount "I hated you / with all the love /anyone could imagine" is memorable.
Top writing...
Cheers

phill

 Comment Written 13-Oct-2024

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reply by the author on 13-Oct-2024

Hi Phil,
Thank you so much. Your words and rating mean a lot.
BTW it's not autobiographical :)

reply by phill doran on 13-Oct-2024

Then it is a remarkable exercise, well done.