Reviews from

Recess

a sedoka

6 total reviews 
Comment from Sugarray77
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Great job on this verse. You crafted this unique form with skill and deftness. A Sedoka can be tricky, but you did just fine. Good luck in the contest!

Melissa


 Comment Written 05-Sep-2024


reply by the author on 05-Sep-2024
    Thank you, Melissa
Comment from SimianSavant
Good
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

The contest rules do actually say unrhymed. "A sedoka consists of two unrhymed three-line stanzas". But it looks like your entry slipped past the judges. I like your piece, but in fairness to another entry that was also noncompliant and received a docked star, I am doing the same here. Message me back if you amend it though.

Regards,

🦍

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2024


reply by the author on 05-Sep-2024
    If the word NO appears, then there is no rhyming.
reply by SimianSavant on 05-Sep-2024
    It says exactly what it says. If you see a sign that says "trespassers will be prosecuted", are you going to walk onto that property because it doesn't say "no trespassing"? Unless you are a secret member of the CEC and in control of the regulations, the rules are clear. They were not enforced as they should have been. Your entry was not the only noncompliant entry. They didn't chose to give you a pass. Rather, someone dropped the ball. 🦍
reply by the author on 05-Sep-2024
    I acknowledge that the sedoka does not fit the stated parameters. If I win any bongo bucks, I will send the fake funds to whomever you select.
reply by SimianSavant on 05-Sep-2024
    No worries. I'm just trying to be a fair reviewer. 🦍
Comment from Sarah Probe S.
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hi there,
Very interesting shuffle of verses, i would be curious to know who would be described as " we " and as " they " in your lovely poem,
Many thanks,
Regards,
Sarah

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2024


reply by the author on 05-Sep-2024
    Thank you, Sarah
Comment from Cindy Decker 3
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Author,

This is an excellent Sedona poem! Your words could be used by anyone, especially a soldier who is about to go to battle while rallying his troops.
It's also a great poem for everyday life.
Great contest entry.
Best wishes,
Cindy

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2024


reply by the author on 05-Sep-2024
    Thank you, Cindy
Comment from tempeste
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Ciao mystery poet,

Once we just had to take what came but now I read we can release chemicals in the atmosphere to make it rain.

That's what apparently caused the floods in Dubai last April.

Our arrogance will be our downfall.


I love the flow in your poem but that said you must re-read the requirements.

The poem is supposed to be unrhymed. ( sigh)

 Comment Written 05-Sep-2024


reply by the author on 05-Sep-2024
    Unrhymed, to me, means, I don't have to make it rhyme.
reply by tempeste on 05-Sep-2024
    That's one way of interpreting "unrhymed" as if it's an option.

    I do think it meant no rhyme, though.

    Either way

    Best of Luck!
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I love the confident flow of your poem. The second stanza is especially powerful. It's like a battle cry! I love the message of your poem and it had so much energy. Great job!

 Comment Written 04-Sep-2024


reply by the author on 05-Sep-2024
    Thank you, Michael.