A Twist of Fate
that led to the beginning of their forever5 total reviews
Comment from Colorado Owl
A heart-warming story! I connected with the characters very easily and understand too well how luggage can get mixed up. I'm left with questions about how Lucas, without his blueprints, was able to avoid disaster at his meeting, but details of that would be a distraction from your main storyline. Thank you for sharing this.
  |
A heart-warming story! I connected with the characters very easily and understand too well how luggage can get mixed up. I'm left with questions about how Lucas, without his blueprints, was able to avoid disaster at his meeting, but details of that would be a distraction from your main storyline. Thank you for sharing this.
Comment Written 28-Jul-2024
Comment from Patty Mazzurco
Your story weaves a compelling tale of serendipity and connection, blending the excitement of unexpected encounters with the charm of two people discovering each other through a suitcase mix-up. The attention to detail in describing Emily and Lucas's initial panic, their growing curiosity about each other's lives, and their eventual deepening bond is both engaging and heartfelt.
The way you depict their journey from frustration to a meaningful relationship is very moving. The evolution from strangers with a shared problem to a loving couple is depicted with authenticity and warmth. The final proposal scene is particularly touching, capturing the depth of their feelings and the significance of their unique journey together.
|
Your story weaves a compelling tale of serendipity and connection, blending the excitement of unexpected encounters with the charm of two people discovering each other through a suitcase mix-up. The attention to detail in describing Emily and Lucas's initial panic, their growing curiosity about each other's lives, and their eventual deepening bond is both engaging and heartfelt.
The way you depict their journey from frustration to a meaningful relationship is very moving. The evolution from strangers with a shared problem to a loving couple is depicted with authenticity and warmth. The final proposal scene is particularly touching, capturing the depth of their feelings and the significance of their unique journey together.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2024
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
What a beautifully crafted story! ! The way you wove together Emily and Lucas's accidental mix up and their bond was so heartwarming and enjoyable to read. I thought you did a great job of sharing tension and romance. And I love the details of their discovery and eventual love. It made them feel so real. The ending was perfect!
|
What a beautifully crafted story! ! The way you wove together Emily and Lucas's accidental mix up and their bond was so heartwarming and enjoyable to read. I thought you did a great job of sharing tension and romance. And I love the details of their discovery and eventual love. It made them feel so real. The ending was perfect!
Comment Written 26-Jul-2024
Comment from Thesis
I enjoyed the story, but you missed several major issues in your proofreading. Your second and third paragraphs show that they Did take the right suitcases since she took the one with the yellow ribbon, and he took the one with the red tag. Also in the second paragraph, you describe Emily as a book editor with a manuscript from a promising young author, later, she says, "That manuscript is the most important thing I've worked on all year." The expectation that you portrayed was that the manuscript was from a client, not her work. I suggest you re-read it and perhaps think about doing an edit.
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2024
 |
I enjoyed the story, but you missed several major issues in your proofreading. Your second and third paragraphs show that they Did take the right suitcases since she took the one with the yellow ribbon, and he took the one with the red tag. Also in the second paragraph, you describe Emily as a book editor with a manuscript from a promising young author, later, she says, "That manuscript is the most important thing I've worked on all year." The expectation that you portrayed was that the manuscript was from a client, not her work. I suggest you re-read it and perhaps think about doing an edit.
Comment Written 26-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 26-Jul-2024
-
Thesis,
Thank you for your review. I've reviewed this story in light of your comments and made the necessary changes.
All the best,
BB50
Comment from RodG
I love a good "unexpected romance" story and you set yours up very well by describing the luggage mishap and Emily and Lucas' reactions. I also like how they meet when the airline tracks down their respective luggage. But I think the last few scenes about their courtship could easily be compressed.
We LIKE the characters and that's what really counts. Rod
|
I love a good "unexpected romance" story and you set yours up very well by describing the luggage mishap and Emily and Lucas' reactions. I also like how they meet when the airline tracks down their respective luggage. But I think the last few scenes about their courtship could easily be compressed.
We LIKE the characters and that's what really counts. Rod
Comment Written 26-Jul-2024
