Reviews from

Silent Voices

Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "Unfinished"
Verses of personification

12 total reviews 
Comment from Ginda Simpson
Excellent
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Wow, I wish I had a six or even a seven for this one, so filled with imagery and feeling. Your descriptions and attention to details pulls us into this space so completely. Beautiful!

 Comment Written 20-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 22-Apr-2024
    Ginda, I appreciate that so much. Thank you xoxoxo
Comment from lyenochka
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That's so sad to think of a "life unfinished." I love the way you created this collage of impressions that gives the poem a dreamlike feel. Great use of sight and sounds with the onomatopoeia (click) and personification (weeping walls.)

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 22-Apr-2024
    Thank you so much, Helen! Xoxo
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Excellent
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You've painted a wonderful picture with words. Thank you for sharing your talent with us. I feel blessed to be able to read this poem. I could see the scene as I read.

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2024

Comment from patcelaw
Excellent
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This is a beautifully written poem. It flows very well when it is read aloud the structure the presentation and everything about it is just wonderful. Have a good day and may God bless you. Patric.

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2024

Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Excellent
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Magical, Jess! Once again, you capture such beauty and intrigue in the most unlikely subjects. Love the "cucumber melon" essence and the walls weeping to wear the "half-painted canvas." There's lots more and I could go on. But well done once more! Take care Debbie xo

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2024

Comment from Natureschild
Excellent
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This piece effectively captures a moment of quiet contemplation while the imagery creates a vivid atmosphere and sensory details which bring depth to the scene. It leaves me with a sense of a life which passed prematurely.

The poetry has a lyrical flow. It is enjoyable to read. Nicely done - Terry

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 23-Apr-2024
    Thank you so much, Terry!
reply by Natureschild on 24-Apr-2024
    You're welcome
Comment from Mark Jackson
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

That is fantastic. I love it. I don't know where the inspiration comes from but it feels so well observed that it has to be real a memory rather than a creation. This is my favourite stanza: A thick silence/swallows the sound,
/and the purple-walled room/smells of cucumber melon. It has so much in it, alliteration I love, and then a smell. I think the smell is what makes it come alive for me. It has to be a six.

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 23-Apr-2024
    Mark, I'm so sorry for the late reply on this. Thank you so much!! Xoxo
Comment from Douglas Goff
Excellent
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I have not seen your works in a while, Jessica, and quickly realized I missed your magnetic musings.


You do have a way with words! Almost like an alphabet dance that results in beauty. Nice work here
D

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2024

Comment from June Sargent
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

A room in mourning with weeping walls missing the artist of the unfinished painting. This is a tender, yet powerful piece that epitomizes grief. A wonderful addition to your book.

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2024


reply by the author on 23-Apr-2024
    June, thank-you so much! Xo
Comment from royowen
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Beautifully written Jessica, I think we all have some regrets that our lives could've been better, but the best laid plans of men and mice suggest it might be an epidemic, I love it, a great observation, with a humble conclusion, beautifully written, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2024