The Lair of the Hairy Spider
For fellow arachnophobes10 total reviews
Comment from dragonpoet
Hi Navada,
I like how you use a pattern of consonance in each line to give a clear image in the metaphor you use for the spider's web. You chose your artwork well.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Congrats on placing third in the contest.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.
Joan
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2023
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Hi Navada,
I like how you use a pattern of consonance in each line to give a clear image in the metaphor you use for the spider's web. You chose your artwork well.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Congrats on placing third in the contest.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.
Joan
Comment Written 27-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 27-Dec-2023
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Thank you so much! :)
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Don't mention it, Navada.
Joan
Comment from Mark D. R.
Navada,
Congrats on your placement in this Haiku contest.
One easily admires the webs that spiders create, especially as described in your well-written poem,
Your alliterative flourishes are a plus in my view -- grim geometry is an exquisite phrase in your Haiku.
Mark
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2023
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Navada,
Congrats on your placement in this Haiku contest.
One easily admires the webs that spiders create, especially as described in your well-written poem,
Your alliterative flourishes are a plus in my view -- grim geometry is an exquisite phrase in your Haiku.
Mark
Comment Written 25-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2023
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Thank you so much! :)
Comment from Pearl Edwards
I'm with you on the loathing of these creatures and I am sure they are gemini forms with the beauty of their webs. Enjoyed your haiku poem Navada, and good luck in the contest and avoiding any spiders.
cheers,
valda
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2023
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I'm with you on the loathing of these creatures and I am sure they are gemini forms with the beauty of their webs. Enjoyed your haiku poem Navada, and good luck in the contest and avoiding any spiders.
cheers,
valda
Comment Written 25-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 25-Nov-2023
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Thank you! :)
Comment from Chuck Keller
Very nice haiku with perfect illustration
Again you have done a wonderful job with a few words
Thank YOU for sharing this one with us
Keep up the great work
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
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Very nice haiku with perfect illustration
Again you have done a wonderful job with a few words
Thank YOU for sharing this one with us
Keep up the great work
Comment Written 24-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
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Much appreciated, Chuck! :)
Comment from Rachelle Allen
For a spider-hater, you paid rather impressive homage to this home! They are quite amazing works of geometry...and that's paying impressive homage from me, because something I hate even more than spiders is math!
Good luck in the haiku contest! xo
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
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For a spider-hater, you paid rather impressive homage to this home! They are quite amazing works of geometry...and that's paying impressive homage from me, because something I hate even more than spiders is math!
Good luck in the haiku contest! xo
Comment Written 24-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
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Good call - I'm not that fond of maths myself these days ... :)
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The joke in our house is that I do what I do for a living because all the math it requires is the ability to count to four...and I can do that.
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HA HA! As a musician myself, I get it - and I like it!!!
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I KNEW YOU WOULD!!!!!
Comment from rama devi
Oh! I love the witty and alliterative two-word satori line - a stroke of genius that nudges toward a six, though I do have a suggestion to change patterns to patterned for smoother enjambment and flow between the first two 'connected' lines. Further, I suggest hyphenating it so it reads: intricate patterned.
intricate-patterned
dewy threads glisten like gems -
grim geometry
The alliteration of G in lines one and two make this a delight to read aloud. The consonance of L, S, T and R weave the G sounds together well too.
I enjoyed the unique creativity in this highly original haiku.
Best of luck! Great AHA effect!
Warmly,
rd
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
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Oh! I love the witty and alliterative two-word satori line - a stroke of genius that nudges toward a six, though I do have a suggestion to change patterns to patterned for smoother enjambment and flow between the first two 'connected' lines. Further, I suggest hyphenating it so it reads: intricate patterned.
intricate-patterned
dewy threads glisten like gems -
grim geometry
The alliteration of G in lines one and two make this a delight to read aloud. The consonance of L, S, T and R weave the G sounds together well too.
I enjoyed the unique creativity in this highly original haiku.
Best of luck! Great AHA effect!
Warmly,
rd
Comment Written 24-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
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Thank you so much - that's a very good suggestion! xx
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xxxooo
Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill
Very good picture. Where's the spider? My personal opinion? I would make the matte a medium grey and lighten the type bolding.Since the web is black and white, the grey would empathize that Connection. Hope your turkey day was good. Your writing was real and involving. Karen
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
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Very good picture. Where's the spider? My personal opinion? I would make the matte a medium grey and lighten the type bolding.Since the web is black and white, the grey would empathize that Connection. Hope your turkey day was good. Your writing was real and involving. Karen
Comment Written 24-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
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Thank you!
Comment from Wendy G
Excellent! The photo is wonderful - very beautiful. I don't worry too much about spiders as most are harmless, but I probably should take more care. I enjoyed the lovely imagery of the webs sparkling like gems with the dew and your sartori line then shocks one into the realisation of the purpose of the web - the geometry is admirable, but the purpose is grim - to capture and devour prey! Very best wishes for the contest - it should do well.
Wendy
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
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Excellent! The photo is wonderful - very beautiful. I don't worry too much about spiders as most are harmless, but I probably should take more care. I enjoyed the lovely imagery of the webs sparkling like gems with the dew and your sartori line then shocks one into the realisation of the purpose of the web - the geometry is admirable, but the purpose is grim - to capture and devour prey! Very best wishes for the contest - it should do well.
Wendy
Comment Written 24-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
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Thank you so much for your insightful comments, Wendy! xx
Comment from Lisasview
Good morning Navada, from Lisa in now getting rather chilly Spain....
Love the thoughts behind this poem and oh the perfect image to go along with it.
I posted a couple of Haiku poem when I first joined Fan Story a couple of months ago. I enjoyed writing them,
Lisa
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
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Good morning Navada, from Lisa in now getting rather chilly Spain....
Love the thoughts behind this poem and oh the perfect image to go along with it.
I posted a couple of Haiku poem when I first joined Fan Story a couple of months ago. I enjoyed writing them,
Lisa
Comment Written 24-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
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Thank you!
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You are so welcome Navada,
Lisa
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
I love the sentiment here as this web lures in the prey into the spiders web, but once bejewelled with patterns, it can be seen, but it is still deadly. Spiders are clever creatures and they have to be cunning to eat. As you live in Australia then I can understand your hatred of them as they are deadly over there! Love Dolly x
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
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I love the sentiment here as this web lures in the prey into the spiders web, but once bejewelled with patterns, it can be seen, but it is still deadly. Spiders are clever creatures and they have to be cunning to eat. As you live in Australia then I can understand your hatred of them as they are deadly over there! Love Dolly x
Comment Written 24-Nov-2023
reply by the author on 24-Nov-2023
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Absolutely right! But even the non-deadly ones freak me out. :(
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Ha ha ha, if you have a spider in your bathroom, call me and I will come and rescue it for you and put it outside x x x