Ghost
Viewing comments for Chapter 37 "The Clue"Biography/Supernatural
9 total reviews
Comment from T B Botts
Hello Lea,
I'm finding this chapter a little bit confusing. It's almost like you're writing about two different things. I gather that you feel that there is a conspiracy going on. It would be an odd thing for the grandparents to be involved in lieu of the fact that you have a step father, unless they are his parents, in which case, your mom is all screwed up. I'll see what the next chapter reveals.
Blessings,
Tom
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
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Hello Lea,
I'm finding this chapter a little bit confusing. It's almost like you're writing about two different things. I gather that you feel that there is a conspiracy going on. It would be an odd thing for the grandparents to be involved in lieu of the fact that you have a step father, unless they are his parents, in which case, your mom is all screwed up. I'll see what the next chapter reveals.
Blessings,
Tom
Comment Written 28-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
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Next chapter does reveal. Yes, indeed, thank you awesome to see you And read your thoughts and you're compassionate comments. Thank you!!
Comment from Rachelle Allen
Hmmm. Okay, this one, Sweetie, is a little too vague. We're in with you too deep now, and this feels almost coy and teasing. For example, when you write "it's a pattern of behaviour I've seen in a few family members.
They say the same things comment on the same subjects and pass on the same BS information to us all!" and: "We have been controlled and manipulated since as far back as I can remember. Isolated incidents over the years popped up and started to make sense to fit on the puzzle board which corroborates this new revelation I'm having," you should provide specifics of each. Pertinent examples of what's been said and done. We want to put this puzzle together WITH you. But you have to let us see the pieces.
Also, this part, I've read and read and read and still just can't make it make sense. I'm sorry; I've tried very hard and keep coming up empty-handed:
Acid tears the cheeks repast
A trail of start more
This leads only to betrayal
My heart's bewilderment
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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Hmmm. Okay, this one, Sweetie, is a little too vague. We're in with you too deep now, and this feels almost coy and teasing. For example, when you write "it's a pattern of behaviour I've seen in a few family members.
They say the same things comment on the same subjects and pass on the same BS information to us all!" and: "We have been controlled and manipulated since as far back as I can remember. Isolated incidents over the years popped up and started to make sense to fit on the puzzle board which corroborates this new revelation I'm having," you should provide specifics of each. Pertinent examples of what's been said and done. We want to put this puzzle together WITH you. But you have to let us see the pieces.
Also, this part, I've read and read and read and still just can't make it make sense. I'm sorry; I've tried very hard and keep coming up empty-handed:
Acid tears the cheeks repast
A trail of start more
This leads only to betrayal
My heart's bewilderment
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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Ok, would you mind re-reading this please? I've done a lot of changes and alluded to some things.
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YESSSSSS!! This is SOOO much better!! This is the beginning of the unmasking, and it is fantastic. There are still "spags" --are you familiar with that term? S(pelling) P(unctuation) a(nd) G(rammar) but the meat of the story is fantastic. The allusions to Bigger Things is great, and the examples make me fall right in step with you and say, "She's spot on! I agree! I see exactly what she's saying!" We're arm-in-arm with you now. VERY well done.
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I thank you and bow to your.
Wisdom. Lol
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Nope. I'm just more experienced at seeing spags. You're getting there. It's a process. Your storytelling prowess, though, is exceptional. At that, you are a natural. xo
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Thank you so much, I appreciate that. Yes, I do lack any punctuation and stuff
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That's okay. Its not as if we're born with that knowledge, right? You'll pick it up easily, as you do everything. You're a very quick study...and so eager to learn. There's no better combination than that. xoxo
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😁🫠😉🙃
Comment from damommy
So you think everyone's in cahoots with some common plan. I can't begin to figure that out, although I've tried. For some reason, I don't trust the grandparents, either. I can't wait to see what you've finally realized.
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2023
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So you think everyone's in cahoots with some common plan. I can't begin to figure that out, although I've tried. For some reason, I don't trust the grandparents, either. I can't wait to see what you've finally realized.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2023
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Well, you're very smart, you're certainly on the right track. In my next, I should have some answers to questions in there. Thank you again for reading and hanging in there with me! Hope you have a great night!
Comment from Jim Wile
I can visualize what's coming, Lea. Your senses are on high alert now because you suspect something awful is about to happen. You are no safer here than in the woods. You may have felt naive, but your intuition was exerting itself to help protect you.
You have laid the clues here, and I hope beyond hope, that what I fear never came to pass. You're drawing out the suspense really well. - Jim
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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I can visualize what's coming, Lea. Your senses are on high alert now because you suspect something awful is about to happen. You are no safer here than in the woods. You may have felt naive, but your intuition was exerting itself to help protect you.
You have laid the clues here, and I hope beyond hope, that what I fear never came to pass. You're drawing out the suspense really well. - Jim
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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Thank you, Jim, you have the best reviews. And the most amazing thoughtful comments you use your head.
And some people don't know how to do that. Thank you very much!
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
I think you might mean "systemic abuse" Lea. Like an unwritten rule in a system of control and manipulation. There is an eerie tone here that you convey well. People who seem to be warm and comforting have another agenda of coercive behaviour, keeping information away from the authorities, perhaps. It means that, fundamentally, you're still on your own, isolated from genuinely caring guardianship. Small edit: "Ok vhat do you girls (w?). There is anger but a determination here to get to the bottom of this apparent conspiracy. Your emotions are perfectly captured here in this vividly expressed chapter. Thanks for sharing, Lea. Debbie x
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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I think you might mean "systemic abuse" Lea. Like an unwritten rule in a system of control and manipulation. There is an eerie tone here that you convey well. People who seem to be warm and comforting have another agenda of coercive behaviour, keeping information away from the authorities, perhaps. It means that, fundamentally, you're still on your own, isolated from genuinely caring guardianship. Small edit: "Ok vhat do you girls (w?). There is anger but a determination here to get to the bottom of this apparent conspiracy. Your emotions are perfectly captured here in this vividly expressed chapter. Thanks for sharing, Lea. Debbie x
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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That has been what it's been like to grow up with these people. It's always suspicion, and who's doing what nobody had the balls to look each other in the eye and say look, man this is my truth!
My grandmother had a Harsh Dutch accent, she couldn't make the W sounds so she replaced it with a V. This is why I have a V in her responses or questions in her dialogue. Yes and it almost involved a death they're still sit free today these people. My sister and I were targets but we both made it out alive. We have our scars, what we made it out. Thank you again, Debbie for reading your words of support me a lot. Hanging there with me means a lot all of it. I said it's under time final number of broken recoremember when everyone to know who supports me here with my writing and it was pretty. I'm the most grateful person on the planet I swear.
Thank you again for your night!
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
It is a pity that you were not told about what was really going on but I hope you took comfort in finally being safe with a roof over your head and food on the table. Your Grandparents are good people and they are willing to look after you. I dare say that the Police are going to be involved eventually and this is probably why your Grandmother did not want to worry you. Another fine chapter Lea, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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It is a pity that you were not told about what was really going on but I hope you took comfort in finally being safe with a roof over your head and food on the table. Your Grandparents are good people and they are willing to look after you. I dare say that the Police are going to be involved eventually and this is probably why your Grandmother did not want to worry you. Another fine chapter Lea, love Dolly x
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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Thank you, Dolly I appreciate your optimism. I really do I wish that was the case I did get a break as fars as I would be fed and when I was laid my head definitely I mean, certainly you don't have to for a selfless reasons. Thank you again, Dolly everything optimistic ever. thing's lady. I appreciate you have a great night!
Comment from BethShelby
I'm not really getting the clue other than you believe it was all planned in advance. You seem to feel the grandmother was behind it from the beginning. She seems to want to raise you in church and see you get an education. You make her sound like the witch in Hansel and Gretel. I know she isn't planning to eat you. I can't imagine her selling you. I can't wait for the truth to come out.
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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I'm not really getting the clue other than you believe it was all planned in advance. You seem to feel the grandmother was behind it from the beginning. She seems to want to raise you in church and see you get an education. You make her sound like the witch in Hansel and Gretel. I know she isn't planning to eat you. I can't imagine her selling you. I can't wait for the truth to come out.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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Hi Beth, thank you again, I'm always happy to see your reviews. You're so curious. I love that about you! Thanks for calling comments and yet very much. So your answers are coming up quickly. It's a very deep rabbit hole. Thank you again, enjoy your night!
Comment from Alexandra Trovato
This is excellent work because your writing voice is authentic and you have many important feelings and recollections to share. I can imagine your full book helping other kids who have no other voice to hear, like yours. I'm smiling for you, although it's hard to write this,
sure; it's also empowering. I'm glad you still recall your younger feelings. You use expressive words and good imagery that will draw in a readers.
Best wishes,
Alexandra
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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This is excellent work because your writing voice is authentic and you have many important feelings and recollections to share. I can imagine your full book helping other kids who have no other voice to hear, like yours. I'm smiling for you, although it's hard to write this,
sure; it's also empowering. I'm glad you still recall your younger feelings. You use expressive words and good imagery that will draw in a readers.
Best wishes,
Alexandra
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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Thank you again, Alexandra, you always have such fine things to say. I appreciate you thank you so much for hanging in there I'm grateful that you've decided to tag along with me in this journey. And you are right, it is ha
Therepuetic and empowering. Shall we say not so therapeutic for those who were the perpetrators?
Comment from JSD
Goodness! It's turning into a detective mystery. Exciting and intriguing stuff. Well done. A slightly lighter piece, which gives us all a break, including you, but well written nonetheless. x
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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Goodness! It's turning into a detective mystery. Exciting and intriguing stuff. Well done. A slightly lighter piece, which gives us all a break, including you, but well written nonetheless. x
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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Yes, I do get a bit of a break a reprieve and having to look for pula. Yes, to do a good thing. Sometimes you have to do a little bad advice versa. I think that was part of the philosophy too I don't know. Thank you again, I'm glad to see you glad to read your review. Incline to experience your wisdom.
I hope you have the best dinner, LOL.
