Do You Believe In Monsters?
Viewing comments for Chapter 11 "Sins Of The Father "Living with a madman.
33 total reviews
Comment from nomi338
As a young child, me and my two sisters witnessed a man brutally attack his wife by hitting her in the back, maybe in her head with a heavy piece of metal. I do not know if he killed her or not, but she was surely severely injured. we were protected from him which is a good thing as we screamed loudly. We were close enough to hear the sickening sound of his attack. I will never forget the horror of it all. To this day I harbor an intense hatred of any man who physically abuses women and or children. This poem brought back some memories I would just as soon forget.
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
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As a young child, me and my two sisters witnessed a man brutally attack his wife by hitting her in the back, maybe in her head with a heavy piece of metal. I do not know if he killed her or not, but she was surely severely injured. we were protected from him which is a good thing as we screamed loudly. We were close enough to hear the sickening sound of his attack. I will never forget the horror of it all. To this day I harbor an intense hatred of any man who physically abuses women and or children. This poem brought back some memories I would just as soon forget.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
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Oh goodness, you sure do not pass those memories easily. Domestic violence is a stain on humanity. Women have been the most abused group in the history of the entire planet, bar none, and it still goes on and is widely ignored in most countries. Very sad. I appreciate your awesome rating, Sir.
Comment from Merily
Oh wow. This is powerful to me. I can relate to this in different ways. I lost my mother when I was 10. She was divorced from my father and had mental health issues that you don't always appreciate at that age. But even at the age of 10, I knew she was a kind woman at heart with many issues.
Enter my father. I was terrified of losing him, but only because I knew my mother couldn't look after me. My fear was being taken into care. What is etched in my memory was visiting my mother in hospital with him. He spent a full hour ripping her to bits. Nothing she could say or do was any good to him. I hated him for it then, I hate him now, even though he is also dead.
Your work here hits home in different ways in many different circumstances. You know, actions can reverberate down the ages, words also.
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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Oh wow. This is powerful to me. I can relate to this in different ways. I lost my mother when I was 10. She was divorced from my father and had mental health issues that you don't always appreciate at that age. But even at the age of 10, I knew she was a kind woman at heart with many issues.
Enter my father. I was terrified of losing him, but only because I knew my mother couldn't look after me. My fear was being taken into care. What is etched in my memory was visiting my mother in hospital with him. He spent a full hour ripping her to bits. Nothing she could say or do was any good to him. I hated him for it then, I hate him now, even though he is also dead.
Your work here hits home in different ways in many different circumstances. You know, actions can reverberate down the ages, words also.
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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Bad daddy is a theme on here. A lot of us have been screwed up for a long time. Time to put a spotlight on the villains. It brings a sweet release!
Comment from Teri7
This is very well written and very heartfelt. I can understand your relief to know that he won't be able to harm you or your family any longer. My dad physically abused me when I was young and my sister and two younger brothers were scared of him. I am so thankful you can't be damaged by him any longer. Thanks for sharing. Blessings, Teri
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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This is very well written and very heartfelt. I can understand your relief to know that he won't be able to harm you or your family any longer. My dad physically abused me when I was young and my sister and two younger brothers were scared of him. I am so thankful you can't be damaged by him any longer. Thanks for sharing. Blessings, Teri
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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Sorry that happened to you. Seems way too common. My siblings, my mother, and I breathed a collective sigh of relief this week. I think I surprised them by posting this story on Facebook and putting it in a FS contest. I just needed to download.
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Douglas I hope you win it my friend! That will be the icing on the cake!
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It?s way too hard to beat some of the site giants in the open contests. I haven?t even been in there. It was just a platform to share my story. But, everybody does like icing! Ha! I appreciate your kindness, Teri.
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I sure like icing my friend. I don't win contest either. I just enter to keep my mind where I can focus at times. MS is not a nice disease, but I don't know of any nice ones!
Comment from Sally Law
My friend, a powerful post for your contest entry. A long life of woe would be more accurate. I had two insufficient and abusive fathers. Two. My mother was the sweetest thing, but she had terrible taste in men and was easily fooled.
I have learned that the most healing thing I can do for for myself and for my children/grandchildren was to forgive both of them and release their souls to God. Until I did that, the memories of them were like giving a criminal free rent in my head, in my person, actually. My fathers' robbed my joy, and robbed my childhood.
Now as an adult, it doesn't rob me another second because I've given them over to the God who knows all, sees all, and is just. My decision has been tested, believe me, but I know in my heart I have forgiven my Dad and there was a ton to forgive. I have forgiven my stepfather who gave me a concussion the last day I lived in his fine house.
These lyrics are for you, dear friend. I forget where the lyrics come from in my jukebox head at the moment.
For the wrongs we have done
And the wrongs done to us
Are nailed there with Him,
There at the cross.
I pray that you'll be free and the joy of the Lord increased. Don't let your dad's actions live rent free inside you another day. Take it to the cross.
Love,
Sal
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
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My friend, a powerful post for your contest entry. A long life of woe would be more accurate. I had two insufficient and abusive fathers. Two. My mother was the sweetest thing, but she had terrible taste in men and was easily fooled.
I have learned that the most healing thing I can do for for myself and for my children/grandchildren was to forgive both of them and release their souls to God. Until I did that, the memories of them were like giving a criminal free rent in my head, in my person, actually. My fathers' robbed my joy, and robbed my childhood.
Now as an adult, it doesn't rob me another second because I've given them over to the God who knows all, sees all, and is just. My decision has been tested, believe me, but I know in my heart I have forgiven my Dad and there was a ton to forgive. I have forgiven my stepfather who gave me a concussion the last day I lived in his fine house.
These lyrics are for you, dear friend. I forget where the lyrics come from in my jukebox head at the moment.
For the wrongs we have done
And the wrongs done to us
Are nailed there with Him,
There at the cross.
I pray that you'll be free and the joy of the Lord increased. Don't let your dad's actions live rent free inside you another day. Take it to the cross.
Love,
Sal
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
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Wise words from a very wise woman. Thank you for the guidance. It seems to be a marathon and not a sprint with forgiveness. I appreciate you taking the time to review this. Douglas
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Most welcome. Understand, I say this to myself all the time. Even when I get mad at my husband, which is rare, I must forgive. If I don't, it's dragged into the bed and all sorts of places, and rearing it's ugly head.
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Most welcome. Understand, I say this to myself all the time. Even when I get mad at my husband, which is rare, I must forgive. If I don't, it's dragged into the bed and all sorts of places, and rears it's ugly head. Jack and I resolved years ago not to go to bed mad at one another or with unforgiving hearts. It's served us well. Blessings, my friend.
Sal :))
Comment from Debi Pick Marquette
Douglas- In my eyes this is the winner! Winner of the Contest and winner in your heart! It is epitome of truth, pain, and deep down scars that surfaced when this man died! Virtual Ten!
I wrote in a poem called godfather, about the man who molested me as a child. He threatened something bad would happen to my dad if I told, so that monster stole my childhood. I suffered day and night as a kid that he would hurt my daddy.
I rejoiced the day he died. And at 42 years old, my secret was finally told. My dad was distraught and its a good thing the godfather was gone or his threat would have come true. My dad would have gone to prison for killing the bastard. Awesome post, my friend!
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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Douglas- In my eyes this is the winner! Winner of the Contest and winner in your heart! It is epitome of truth, pain, and deep down scars that surfaced when this man died! Virtual Ten!
I wrote in a poem called godfather, about the man who molested me as a child. He threatened something bad would happen to my dad if I told, so that monster stole my childhood. I suffered day and night as a kid that he would hurt my daddy.
I rejoiced the day he died. And at 42 years old, my secret was finally told. My dad was distraught and its a good thing the godfather was gone or his threat would have come true. My dad would have gone to prison for killing the bastard. Awesome post, my friend!
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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Thank you, Debi. It was raw and written minutes after I saw the obituary and learned Dean was dead. Sometimes I need a bump to submit the really personal stuff. That is what the contest was. A launching platform to unload my emotional mess. I just switched the words sorrow and shame for woe. So I have not even been in the voting booth to check. Just not what this was about. What has happened is the wonderful people like you have come to my aid with your warm stories and support. This has actually changed my perspective and I am no longer ashamed or feeling guilt about my joyous reaction. Now I just feel a warm relief that he is really and truly gone. He is in God?s hands to judge. I know he was dealing with some mental illness issues. Not making excuses for him in any way, just know that God will handle this and I am free. My family is free. And God is good.
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And you are good too.
I figure there would be something wrong with you if you wouldn't have felt that way. I forgot to write what I was feeling the whole time reading. I am so sorry you had to live like that. And so happy you got that out! You are awesome, Douglas!!
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For a simple writing platform, there sure is some serious therapy going on up in here!
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But it helps to know you have that kind of friends. To tell you the truth I don't lay this kinda stuff on anyone else in my other world, so I feel somewhat closer to you guys. And I try to keep it light, like you do, but boy when you need to get it out it is there for you. Not only that but you open it up for others who have been thru it, and have been timid about talking about it. That happened for me, and I couldn't believe how many women have been molested. They were coming out of the woodwork, like my dad used to say.
Comment from Debi Pick Marquette
Douglas- In my eyes this is the winner! Winner of the Contest and winner in your heart! It is epitome of truth, pain, and deep down scars that surfaced when this man died! Virtual Ten!
I wrote in a poem called godfather, about the man who molested me as a child. He threatened something bad would happen to my dad if I told, so that monster stole my childhood. I suffered day and night as a kid that he would hurt my daddy.
I rejoiced the day he died. And at 42 years old, my secret was finally told. My dad was distraught and its a good thing the godfather was gone or his threat would have come true. My dad would have gone to prison for killing the bastard. Awesome post, my friend!
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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Douglas- In my eyes this is the winner! Winner of the Contest and winner in your heart! It is epitome of truth, pain, and deep down scars that surfaced when this man died! Virtual Ten!
I wrote in a poem called godfather, about the man who molested me as a child. He threatened something bad would happen to my dad if I told, so that monster stole my childhood. I suffered day and night as a kid that he would hurt my daddy.
I rejoiced the day he died. And at 42 years old, my secret was finally told. My dad was distraught and its a good thing the godfather was gone or his threat would have come true. My dad would have gone to prison for killing the bastard. Awesome post, my friend!
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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This came over twice. Hmm?.
Comment from Annmuma
Honest, from the heart and to the heart of your readers. There are so many, way too many, who have suffered are now suffer cruelty at the hands of abusers. Perhaps, the saddest part of all is that there is always someone who knows and keeps too quiet. I admire your courage and your strength, both in surviving and in sharing. Maybe some of the joy you felt at hearing of his death was joy that, although you cannot forget you may be loosened from the burden of not-forgiving. Of course, I am not making that assumption of forgiveness/unforgiveness -- it just occurred to me as I was writing. Exceptional post. ann
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2023
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Honest, from the heart and to the heart of your readers. There are so many, way too many, who have suffered are now suffer cruelty at the hands of abusers. Perhaps, the saddest part of all is that there is always someone who knows and keeps too quiet. I admire your courage and your strength, both in surviving and in sharing. Maybe some of the joy you felt at hearing of his death was joy that, although you cannot forget you may be loosened from the burden of not-forgiving. Of course, I am not making that assumption of forgiveness/unforgiveness -- it just occurred to me as I was writing. Exceptional post. ann
Comment Written 26-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2023
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Thank you, Ann. I think you may be right. The relief my family has felt has been tremendous. This man left a lot of damaged people in his wake.
Comment from gramalot8
Douglas.... I'm so sorry you had to go through this ordeal in your life... but grateful you were able to get out of it... albeit still being discovered at times. My daughter had a similar type of relationship that ... long story short... ended up with her daughter... my granddaughter... committing suicide. Glad you're still here and I recognize and feel the time earned joy you deserve.
Seems redundant to say good luck in the contest... as you've already won your reward.
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2023
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Douglas.... I'm so sorry you had to go through this ordeal in your life... but grateful you were able to get out of it... albeit still being discovered at times. My daughter had a similar type of relationship that ... long story short... ended up with her daughter... my granddaughter... committing suicide. Glad you're still here and I recognize and feel the time earned joy you deserve.
Seems redundant to say good luck in the contest... as you've already won your reward.
Comment Written 26-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2023
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Yes! My win was all of you jumping in with support. You guys have really helped me see this in a different light. Thank you!
Comment from Wendy G
This must have been very hard to write, but you did it well, from the heart, and with honesty, insight and clarity. It could also have been entered in the "Monsters" contest. An excellent take on the topic of "woe" speaking of people who feel obligated to falsely express "woe" and sorrow at a funeral, when often the feeling is relief - or joy. Bets wishes for your entry.
Wendy
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2023
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This must have been very hard to write, but you did it well, from the heart, and with honesty, insight and clarity. It could also have been entered in the "Monsters" contest. An excellent take on the topic of "woe" speaking of people who feel obligated to falsely express "woe" and sorrow at a funeral, when often the feeling is relief - or joy. Bets wishes for your entry.
Wendy
Comment Written 26-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2023
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Thanks, Wendy. It was raw emotion. Too many people knew of my Dean Paul stories to put it in a blind contest. When I learned he he died this contest was right there and honestly, it was simply a platform to unload my immediate feelings into. The joy surprised me. It?s been a long time and I hoping that as a Christian I was past the bitter resentment and such. I?m not. I also learned that none of my family members are either. So much unresolved anger. Talk about a group therapy session. Oh my! Thankfully, my have you guys to keep me straight.
D
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
I'm with you on feeling 'joy' at his death, and I don't think God would think that a sin. Your step-father was satan's man, and he will be well received in Hell! I can't believe he was nice to his next wife, a man like that can never change, he proved that by stalking you and your family. I feel desperatly sad for all of you, your mother and your siblings. I'm glad you wrote this, I hope it enables you to move forward with a smile! Good luck in the contest. :) Sandra xx
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2023
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I'm with you on feeling 'joy' at his death, and I don't think God would think that a sin. Your step-father was satan's man, and he will be well received in Hell! I can't believe he was nice to his next wife, a man like that can never change, he proved that by stalking you and your family. I feel desperatly sad for all of you, your mother and your siblings. I'm glad you wrote this, I hope it enables you to move forward with a smile! Good luck in the contest. :) Sandra xx
Comment Written 26-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 26-Oct-2023
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Thank you, Sandra. The contest was simply a means to relieve myself of raw emotions. Thankfully all of you Fanstorians have come in and supported me with a good and proper dose of heathy perspective. I really appreciate you folks.
I have heard recently that you are correct about his last family. He tormented them as well. All the real monsters are walking amongst us. Bless you!
