Ghost
Viewing comments for Chapter 24 "Walking Stick Lady"Biography/Supernatural
11 total reviews
Comment from Pearl Edwards
Your improvisation during this period of living only in a forest amazes me.
She's not alone, my hand reaches out to her...our eyes meet... I found this chapter's opening very emotional. Well done, Lea for having the strength to keep on going.
cheers,
valda
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
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Your improvisation during this period of living only in a forest amazes me.
She's not alone, my hand reaches out to her...our eyes meet... I found this chapter's opening very emotional. Well done, Lea for having the strength to keep on going.
cheers,
valda
Comment Written 29-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
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Thank you so much again my friend so happy liked it!
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
You were losing weight through lack of food Lea, how terrible. It is amazing what you can find out by just watching Lea. My husband did some PI work and I helped on occasions as we need to follow some people. No one ever thinks they are being followed so it is easy to fine out about people's activities, the plot thickens here Lea, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2023
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You were losing weight through lack of food Lea, how terrible. It is amazing what you can find out by just watching Lea. My husband did some PI work and I helped on occasions as we need to follow some people. No one ever thinks they are being followed so it is easy to fine out about people's activities, the plot thickens here Lea, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
Comment Written 20-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2023
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Thank you to ally for your thoughts and for your kindness and compassion. I always appreciate them every time I might sound like a broken record. LOL that's very cool. Your husband PI work and then you were able to assist. I hope that it's served you well. Thank you again, I appreciate this so very much. I'm waiting for Spring time now, LOL impatient.
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My husband spend 30 years in law enforcement and then did some work as a PI. I did follow a few people and they never knew I was following, in order to gather information for his work, it is not as exciting as it sounds, ha ha ha, your posts are interesting Lea, love Dolly x
Comment from T B Botts
Hello Lea,
I'm glad that you mentioned the fact that you were losing weight. It would be the natural thing considering that you have such a limited supply of food. I'm curious, though you may have mentioned it at the beginning, did you have any kind of toothbrush or way to take care of oral hygiene? Of course there would be the issue too of needing a toilet of some sort. You can't be fouling the area around your campsite. It's nice that you grabbed up the old bag's walking stick. Maybe she won't be able to get around too well without it. Thanks for sharing gal.
Have a blessed day.
Tom
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2023
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Hello Lea,
I'm glad that you mentioned the fact that you were losing weight. It would be the natural thing considering that you have such a limited supply of food. I'm curious, though you may have mentioned it at the beginning, did you have any kind of toothbrush or way to take care of oral hygiene? Of course there would be the issue too of needing a toilet of some sort. You can't be fouling the area around your campsite. It's nice that you grabbed up the old bag's walking stick. Maybe she won't be able to get around too well without it. Thanks for sharing gal.
Have a blessed day.
Tom
Comment Written 19-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2023
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Yes, my friend brought me a clean toothbrush and some toothpaste. I dug 2 holes in the back benind the cedar trees. When I left, I filled them in again. I dug it out with a piece of fir bark. Great to see you here offering your comments and compassion always. I'll keep telling you that LOL thank you so much. Really? Make sure you have a good evening and that you're feeling good. And pat yourself on the back, you deserve it! Thank you!
Comment from Rachelle Allen
Knowledge at last of who is on your trail...and your case! Sheesh! Like you're bothering her. It's not as if she said, "She seemed young, and I'm worried about her."
You meant to write "The son made a frustrated one-eighty." A three-sixty would be a complete circle and bring him back where he started. I was picturing the chubby kid doing a pirouette the first time I read it. Ditto for his mother when she released her walking stick: did she turn in a circle? She may have because she was so confused about the direction from which the rocks were being tossed. But, if not, then "turned in a half-circle" is called for, instead.
I know we've talked about letting everything pour out for now and then going back, with Michele Harber as the editor extraordinaire, to edit and polish. I did have this one edit to suggest now, though. As always, it has the potential to be worth exactly what you're paying for it. And remember, too, that these are just my thoughts. This is YOUR piece. It needs to sound like YOUR words. So only use what feels natural with your syntax.
In the paragraph that begins "Behind some foliage..." after the words 'found my spot,' I was thinking the following sounded good: "I engaged my focus on the trailhead but set my mind to other matters." To me, that seems like a fluid segue into your thoughts about your sisters.
Well done chapter yet again, Lea, and I liked the preamble to it, too. It set the stage nicely for what we were about to read.
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2023
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Knowledge at last of who is on your trail...and your case! Sheesh! Like you're bothering her. It's not as if she said, "She seemed young, and I'm worried about her."
You meant to write "The son made a frustrated one-eighty." A three-sixty would be a complete circle and bring him back where he started. I was picturing the chubby kid doing a pirouette the first time I read it. Ditto for his mother when she released her walking stick: did she turn in a circle? She may have because she was so confused about the direction from which the rocks were being tossed. But, if not, then "turned in a half-circle" is called for, instead.
I know we've talked about letting everything pour out for now and then going back, with Michele Harber as the editor extraordinaire, to edit and polish. I did have this one edit to suggest now, though. As always, it has the potential to be worth exactly what you're paying for it. And remember, too, that these are just my thoughts. This is YOUR piece. It needs to sound like YOUR words. So only use what feels natural with your syntax.
In the paragraph that begins "Behind some foliage..." after the words 'found my spot,' I was thinking the following sounded good: "I engaged my focus on the trailhead but set my mind to other matters." To me, that seems like a fluid segue into your thoughts about your sisters.
Well done chapter yet again, Lea, and I liked the preamble to it, too. It set the stage nicely for what we were about to read.
Comment Written 19-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2023
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Yes, that's a very good suggestion. I'm gonna go with of them both of them. LOL thank you so much for always reviewing and offering your thoughts recommendations and kind words. I fixed the three sixty one eighty part duh. And you are correct. She did spend in the circles because she wasn't sure where the sound was coming from? Originating from I should say.
So yes, thank you so much. I'm going to do that for sure.... Talking to you soon! I hope you're afternoon is going well and thank you again!
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With hers, you might even make some kind of mention that "unlike her son, she moved in a complete circle, wildly trying to pinpoint the origination of the noise.
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Also a good idea thank you!
Comment from LJbutterfly
I could stop holding my breath on this chapter. What I liked most was you description of the forest, the trees, and the sounds. I felt like I was there.
I'm so glad you were clever enough to spot the walking stick lady and scare her off.
Now, all you need is some nourishing food.
Again, this is great storytelling.
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2023
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I could stop holding my breath on this chapter. What I liked most was you description of the forest, the trees, and the sounds. I felt like I was there.
I'm so glad you were clever enough to spot the walking stick lady and scare her off.
Now, all you need is some nourishing food.
Again, this is great storytelling.
Comment Written 19-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2023
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I thank you so very much i'm glad you think This is good Is story telling and you are liking it. I appreciate all your thoughts and comment and kind words. Is this gold to me as I've said before, and I'll keep on saying it's a great gift. Thank you, and have a great afternoon!
Comment from Jim Wile
Hey, good for you, Lea. A little enjoyment in an otherwise difficult existence! Serves the old biddy right! Once again, you're using a lot of cleverness to keep yourself hidden and to survive this ordeal.
Just a couple of corrections:
I think you mean "compulsion" instead of "compunction."
"The sun made a frustrated three-sixty " -- I think you mean "son"
You even managed to work a Dad joke in there! "How do you spell relief? With a pen of course...duh" Good job! :)
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2023
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Hey, good for you, Lea. A little enjoyment in an otherwise difficult existence! Serves the old biddy right! Once again, you're using a lot of cleverness to keep yourself hidden and to survive this ordeal.
Just a couple of corrections:
I think you mean "compulsion" instead of "compunction."
"The sun made a frustrated three-sixty " -- I think you mean "son"
You even managed to work a Dad joke in there! "How do you spell relief? With a pen of course...duh" Good job! :)
Comment Written 18-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2023
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Good morning Jim, hope everything's well in your world. I did make those corrections thank you for pointing them out. They are gold!
When I get feedback, especially the constructive ones are very important. That's how we grow. Is it not? Thank you for your awesome review!
Thank you for reading. I hope you remain entertained.
and my word gets out there, so 2 birds with one stone! Thank you again and have an awesome day!
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Equilibrium restored, your task in hand is to mislead the old woman so that she doesn't know your whereabouts. In the back of your mind, you're worried about your middle sister but that's been put on hold until your friends' return. You're organising your time well but I'm worried about you losing so much weight. You need more supplies. As ever, an excellent chapter and insight into your young and determined child's mind. Thanks for sharing, Lea! Debbie
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2023
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Equilibrium restored, your task in hand is to mislead the old woman so that she doesn't know your whereabouts. In the back of your mind, you're worried about your middle sister but that's been put on hold until your friends' return. You're organising your time well but I'm worried about you losing so much weight. You need more supplies. As ever, an excellent chapter and insight into your young and determined child's mind. Thanks for sharing, Lea! Debbie
Comment Written 18-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2023
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Hi, Debbie always happy to see your review and I think sharing it probably more beneficial for myself than others but if others are helped or child is saved or anything good and constructive comes from it. I'll be on the sidelines cheering it on! Your insight as ever is spot on and you're comments are also equally accurate. That must be part of your gift as a writer I think.
Your compassion, too, and your empathy is also clear, gratefully accepted. It's so great to have you on this journey you and others have been amazing Support I'm receiving it's so very surprising, and it's so very relieving. It's a better word to be believed, is it true gift? I hope you have the best night. We will try it again soon!
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You're welcome. I meant to say that I liked "My heart slips and my sadness grips" - very vivid, superb!
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Ty!
Comment from Teri7
This is very interesting what you have penned. I bet the woman with the stick did get out of there quickly. The artwork you chose to go with your words is amazing! love and blessings, Teri
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2023
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This is very interesting what you have penned. I bet the woman with the stick did get out of there quickly. The artwork you chose to go with your words is amazing! love and blessings, Teri
Comment Written 18-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2023
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Thank you, Terry, I'm glad you like it. I'm always happy when people enjoy the writing as you do! I appreciate your reviews very much and welcome you along the journey. Thank you again. I hope your day is amazing!
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You are so welcome! I hope you have a very happy and blessed day!
Comment from BethShelby
This chapter was fun because even though you are worried about you sister, you accoumplished some things and are feeling good about yourself. I wonder if you kept he walking stick. If it a real cane she look for it.
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2023
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This chapter was fun because even though you are worried about you sister, you accoumplished some things and are feeling good about yourself. I wonder if you kept he walking stick. If it a real cane she look for it.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2023
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Hi beth thank you so much again! I so appreciate it! Good question too. It's actually not a cane, it's a walking stick. Just a branch picked up off the forest floor about waist high and used for walking. I thank you for continuing to read. I'm so happy you find it interesting enough to continue. I hope your days and nights are amazing!
Comment from damommy
I like the way you handled that situation, throwing rocks to disorient her. Odd that she dropped her walking stick and didn't pick it up.
- The sun [son] made a frustrated three-sixty
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reply by the author on 18-Oct-2023
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I like the way you handled that situation, throwing rocks to disorient her. Odd that she dropped her walking stick and didn't pick it up.
- The sun [son] made a frustrated three-sixty
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2023
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Thank you, I'll go back to change that word to the proper spelling...ugh. The walking stick was a branch selected from the forest floor. However for charity's sake I should just go in and tweak that Any and all suggestions for edit and/or change. I am welcome and open to at all.a little bit. Thank you for picking that up!
I welcome And I'm open to it all, as this is valuable teaching tool as well as exchange of friendly information. Thank you again, and thank you for reading if you wish it's a chapter in an autobio called ghost, it's in my portfolio, feel free to read at any time if you wish thank you again. I hope you have a great day!