Santa's Christmas Carol
The beginning...42 total reviews
Comment from Jay Squires
Oh, my Goodness!! At least you've alerted me not to enter the Fantasy Writing Contest. This deserves to be a winner.
So, we thought ST. Nicholas would be a good moniker. S for Stern and T for Timmons and Nicholas; [Hahhaha! I love it, Terry! You've completely bypassed Sainthood -- and that's good!]
You've come up with a truly fantastic and yet plausible explanation for the existence of Santa Claus. I think this will be a runaway winner, my friend, but if you're smart ... you'll wrap this little baby up and shoot it off to some of the bigger mags right away. They are NOW in the market for Christmas stories. Wow! You've left me flabbergasted.
Jay
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2023
  |
Oh, my Goodness!! At least you've alerted me not to enter the Fantasy Writing Contest. This deserves to be a winner.
So, we thought ST. Nicholas would be a good moniker. S for Stern and T for Timmons and Nicholas; [Hahhaha! I love it, Terry! You've completely bypassed Sainthood -- and that's good!]
You've come up with a truly fantastic and yet plausible explanation for the existence of Santa Claus. I think this will be a runaway winner, my friend, but if you're smart ... you'll wrap this little baby up and shoot it off to some of the bigger mags right away. They are NOW in the market for Christmas stories. Wow! You've left me flabbergasted.
Jay
Comment Written 20-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2023
-
Thank you for all the praise. I am humbled by your generous comments and the six stars. I had a dream about writing a story based on A Christmas Carol, except the Scrooge character was a young toymaker...this was the outcome.
I sent it off to a famous NY Magazine, we will see what they say, if anything.
I have also entered it in a contest out side of FS, and may put in another one. Thanks, We will see what happens. Terry.
-
Good for you. I think it's great that you're testing your wings outside of Fanstory. Don't forget to check if the places you send it to will allow for simultaneous submissions to other mags. Most will, but you have to find out. If you wait for only one to answer, and it's a "no" you won't have much time for sending it to another mag.
Comment from LJbutterfly
This is a perfectly written fantasy tale about how St. Nicholas ended up in the North Pole. I especially enjoyed the beginning of the story about the Hanover Home for Boys orphanage and the creativity demonstrated with the names Stern, Timmons and Nicholas. I was mesmerized from beginning to end. Loved it. Best wishes in the contest.
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2023
|
This is a perfectly written fantasy tale about how St. Nicholas ended up in the North Pole. I especially enjoyed the beginning of the story about the Hanover Home for Boys orphanage and the creativity demonstrated with the names Stern, Timmons and Nicholas. I was mesmerized from beginning to end. Loved it. Best wishes in the contest.
Comment Written 20-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2023
-
Lorraine, Thank you very much for the wonderful review and the six stars. I also have it entered in a couple of contests outside of FS, we will see how it does. Thanks, Terry
Comment from damommy
This is absolutely the best story I've read lately. I was mesmerized from the very first. I love it! I hope you publish this as a book. I would certainly buy it! The dialogue was real, and all the details painted a very vivid picture from beginning to end. I can't praise this enough.
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2023
|
This is absolutely the best story I've read lately. I was mesmerized from the very first. I love it! I hope you publish this as a book. I would certainly buy it! The dialogue was real, and all the details painted a very vivid picture from beginning to end. I can't praise this enough.
Comment Written 20-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2023
-
Aww, thank you so much for those kind words and the six stars. I will enter it a contest or two outside of FS, and I may try to publish it as a short story and add to it over time. Thank you!! Terry.
-
Let me know when you publish. I want to buy it.
-
From your lips to God's ear!
Comment from Annmuma
Well, let me add my 6 to the multitude of others! Great job, Terry, and I can see this book proudly displayed in a myriad of places at Christmastime. Excellent work. Creatively tied to the time period you chose. I love it. ann
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2023
|
Well, let me add my 6 to the multitude of others! Great job, Terry, and I can see this book proudly displayed in a myriad of places at Christmastime. Excellent work. Creatively tied to the time period you chose. I love it. ann
Comment Written 20-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2023
-
Ann, thank you for the six stars and the stellar review. Also, thanks for doing the first read input! Terry.
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Fantasy-astic. Very nicely written. Good work.
And I always thought ... well, I guess I was always wrong.
(smiley face here)
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2023
 |
Fantasy-astic. Very nicely written. Good work.
And I always thought ... well, I guess I was always wrong.
(smiley face here)
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 20-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2023
-
Wayne, thank you. Terry.
Comment from lyenochka
Whew! This was a long one but I'm guessing that the contest had a word requirement. Great job with an alternative beginning to the story that Washington Irving spread about Santa Claus or Saint Nikolaus. I like the humble beginnings of the talented toymakers. Best wishes in the contest!
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2023
|
Whew! This was a long one but I'm guessing that the contest had a word requirement. Great job with an alternative beginning to the story that Washington Irving spread about Santa Claus or Saint Nikolaus. I like the humble beginnings of the talented toymakers. Best wishes in the contest!
Comment Written 19-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 20-Mar-2023
-
Helen, thank you. Terry.
Comment from CrystieCookie999
I liked reading this. It had a little bit of the flavor of Charles Dickens' "Oliver Twist" and "A Christmas Carol" with the time period and orphanage with a 'hard work makes good' theme. Alternate versions of long-loved tales always do well, too. I only found a missing comma that I know of:
"By Jove Ben, I think he's got it."
I would put a comma after Jove.
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2023
|
I liked reading this. It had a little bit of the flavor of Charles Dickens' "Oliver Twist" and "A Christmas Carol" with the time period and orphanage with a 'hard work makes good' theme. Alternate versions of long-loved tales always do well, too. I only found a missing comma that I know of:
"By Jove Ben, I think he's got it."
I would put a comma after Jove.
Comment Written 19-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2023
-
Thank you for your kind review and the six stars. I will take a look at the comma. Terry
Comment from Wendy G
That's quite an amazing and imaginative story, and very well-written. It would make an excellent children's book, with plenty of cute illustrations. Best wishes for success in the fantasy contest.
Wendy
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2023
|
That's quite an amazing and imaginative story, and very well-written. It would make an excellent children's book, with plenty of cute illustrations. Best wishes for success in the fantasy contest.
Wendy
Comment Written 19-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2023
-
Thank you for the kind review. Terry
Comment from nomi338
This incredible origin story needs to be a movie. I would love to Pixar do the honors. I truly believe that it would prove to be a blockbuster. It is better and makes much more sense than any thing I can remember ever seeing. I don't know who you could submit it to, but it really needs to gain the recognition it deserves.
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2023
|
This incredible origin story needs to be a movie. I would love to Pixar do the honors. I truly believe that it would prove to be a blockbuster. It is better and makes much more sense than any thing I can remember ever seeing. I don't know who you could submit it to, but it really needs to gain the recognition it deserves.
Comment Written 19-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2023
-
Nomi, thank you for the encouragement. I also appreciate the six stars! Planning on submitting to a contest outside of FS. I will let you know how it goes. Terry.
-
Best of luck my friend. It was not hyperbole when I said what I said. This could be a blockbuster movie if handled by the right company.
-
And if I knew how to get it to them
Comment from GWHARGIS
I was drawn in by the tale of the orphans. I loved that they crafted figures for each other. That shows they were deeply connected like brothers. That is replicated in the act of drinking the gifted brandy and seeing "him". This was a delightful and heart warming fantasy story. Gretchen
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2023
|
I was drawn in by the tale of the orphans. I loved that they crafted figures for each other. That shows they were deeply connected like brothers. That is replicated in the act of drinking the gifted brandy and seeing "him". This was a delightful and heart warming fantasy story. Gretchen
Comment Written 19-Mar-2023
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2023
-
Thank you for the kind review. Terry.
