Comment from Lea Tonin1

Good

Hello Brian salad sentiment behind your Palm haters gotta love the haters not!
You've got an interesting story line going with this phone as well how is like a story if I'm more entertaining that way.
However there's a juxtaposition between the types of poems that are listed at the top is listed as a free verse poem and yet it's clearly a rhyming poem. So if I take it in the context that it is written as a writing poem then I would like to make a suggestion to you about flow. The flow meaning the beat the cadence the rhythm of the poem.

For example the 1st 2 lines of your poem when I read them out are in perfect flow the same cadence the same beat and then you have this really really long line It takes away from the flow that you created by the 1st 2 lines.
If I may suggest breaking up that 3rd line into 2 for example

Your line:
dumb lines make me feel like i live in a shack that needs paint. To

Dumb lines don't make me feel great
Like life in a shack that really needs paint

This improves the flow of your poem when you read the 4 lines together only a suggestion of course it is your poem and you right it out anyway that you choose just thoughts for you perhaps pretty useful and future
Good luck in the contest thank you for your submission!

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Mar-2023

Thank you I also believe that my poems are very misunderstood from a traditional point of view, tha k you for a long review

Comment from Ricky1024

Excellent

To His was well written rich in Theme and Imagery.
It also, read well and Flowed well with no Grammar Issues.
Thanks for sharing this and have a great day.
Doctor Ricky

 Comment Written 27-Feb-2023

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reply by the author on 01-Mar-2023

Thank you