Children young and old
Viewing comments for Chapter 9 "Hey Jude"Fun for all
56 total reviews
Comment from Teri7
This is a very well written Even the Odds poem you have penned for the writing prompt. You used very good descriptive words and very good imagery from the art work you chose. I liked the way you started out with Jude not being so popular with the kids, then he did things to make them like him and things changed for him. Best wishes in the contest. love and blessings, teri
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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This is a very well written Even the Odds poem you have penned for the writing prompt. You used very good descriptive words and very good imagery from the art work you chose. I liked the way you started out with Jude not being so popular with the kids, then he did things to make them like him and things changed for him. Best wishes in the contest. love and blessings, teri
Comment Written 24-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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Teri, I thank you so very much for your kindness for my Hey Jude Poem, and always being so thoughtful in your reviews. Your kind words are always so appreciated.
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You are so welcome! Thank you for sharing!!
Comment from poetwatch
Children will be children, but when they see that not all people hate they change, author. We as adults could learn from an innocense child, but no we develop hate when things do not go as planned. Someone said, Treat your neighbor like you would like to be treated. This is a good entry for the Even the Odds Contest.
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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Children will be children, but when they see that not all people hate they change, author. We as adults could learn from an innocense child, but no we develop hate when things do not go as planned. Someone said, Treat your neighbor like you would like to be treated. This is a good entry for the Even the Odds Contest.
Comment Written 24-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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Hi postwatch,, I thank you so very much for your kindness for my Hey Jude Poem, and always being so thoughtful in your reviews. Your kind words are always so appreciated.
Comment from jake cosmos aller
nice take on the form, I would have somehow used the rhyme Dude and rifted more on the underlying Bettles song, perhaps including a link to the song or a line or two from the song.
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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nice take on the form, I would have somehow used the rhyme Dude and rifted more on the underlying Bettles song, perhaps including a link to the song or a line or two from the song.
Comment Written 24-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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Hi Jake, you are so kind. Yeah almost wished I had but started as a bullying for kids. Jude was the only boys name I could come up with. Y?know? Thank you for the thoughtful words for my Hey Jude poem. It is so appreciated, my friend.
Comment from Wayne Fowler
You did it! Yay!
And you made it a monorhyme, too!
Good work.
Only thing (for me) - I didn't understand the line: 'Now not viewed'.
Now not seen, but by whom?
Best wishes.
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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You did it! Yay!
And you made it a monorhyme, too!
Good work.
Only thing (for me) - I didn't understand the line: 'Now not viewed'.
Now not seen, but by whom?
Best wishes.
Comment Written 24-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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Ok Wayne, that line I had it says, stopped the lewd _ crude, but as someone pointed out that they are both adjectives, so I thought the not viewed as crude sounded better. As in the bullies were not viewed so bad anymore. Any suggestions,? And viewed by Jude. Or what do you think of, No more tude, crude
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'No more tude' sounds cool, Dude!
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So glad we now understude each other! Lol! Before I heard from you, I changed it to No more Feud! Which one sounds better? Your opinion means a lot to me.
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no more tude is cooler, but no more feud would dood
Comment from Joanne Gill-Maddick
This is a nicely written poem. It has a great flow and rhyme scheme. Great photo to compliment your words. Nice overall presentation as well. Well done.
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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This is a nicely written poem. It has a great flow and rhyme scheme. Great photo to compliment your words. Nice overall presentation as well. Well done.
Comment Written 24-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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Hi Joanne, I thank you so very much for your kindness for my Hey Jude Poem, and always being so thoughtful in your reviews. Your kind words are always so appreciated.
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Your very welcome.
Comment from closetpoetjester
Ahh so the answer to bullies is to feed them your lunch haha
Sounds like the way to most peoples hearts is through food lol
I liked the way this rhymed throughout in spite of it not being required. You went the extra mile, just like Jude.
Well done. A delightful attempt at evening the odds.
Cheers
CPJ
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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Ahh so the answer to bullies is to feed them your lunch haha
Sounds like the way to most peoples hearts is through food lol
I liked the way this rhymed throughout in spite of it not being required. You went the extra mile, just like Jude.
Well done. A delightful attempt at evening the odds.
Cheers
CPJ
Comment Written 24-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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Hi CPJ, you are so kind. Thank you for the thoughtful words for my Hey Jude poem. It is so appreciated, my friend.
Comment from Sarah Das Gupta
These forms are demanding. They look attractive with the diamond shape but sometimes the rhyming becomes forced in order to accomodate the rhyme. Generally this text reads well!
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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These forms are demanding. They look attractive with the diamond shape but sometimes the rhyming becomes forced in order to accomodate the rhyme. Generally this text reads well!
Comment Written 24-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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Hi Sarah, you are so kind. Thank you for the thoughtful words for my Hey Jude poem. It is so appreciated, my friend.
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Excellent entry for the Even the Odds writing prompt contest. Good syllables count and connection between lines. I hate bullies, it can be so harmful.
I Would recommend it.
Gypsy
"Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason" -- Novalis
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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Excellent entry for the Even the Odds writing prompt contest. Good syllables count and connection between lines. I hate bullies, it can be so harmful.
I Would recommend it.
Gypsy
"Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason" -- Novalis
Comment Written 24-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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Hi Gypsy, you are so kind. Thank you for the thoughtful words for my Hey Jude poem. It is so appreciated, my friend.
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
I was really into this until the last word. Crude is a synonym, but it's an adjective and you precede it with "stopped the lewd", which really wants a noun to come next. Like if you said "stopped the lewd behavior". Of course, that's not a synonym, but you see what I mean.
Otherwise, I think it's terrific! You might want to rethink the ending if it's being judged for contest.
Good luck,
Pam
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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I was really into this until the last word. Crude is a synonym, but it's an adjective and you precede it with "stopped the lewd", which really wants a noun to come next. Like if you said "stopped the lewd behavior". Of course, that's not a synonym, but you see what I mean.
Otherwise, I think it's terrific! You might want to rethink the ending if it's being judged for contest.
Good luck,
Pam
Comment Written 24-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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Ok, my dear smarty pants, JK, lol, how about this? No more viewed, crude or no more tide, crude? What do you think?
Viewed can be a noun or verb. Not a perfect rhyme, but you are the only one who caught me? haha! My problem too is I matched my picture to go with rude and crude, other wise I could have used men and used prude and dude.
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I see that you changed it - and I'm sorry to be the one to cause a stink. It's just that I came to those last two lines and slammed on the brakes. But it's your poem, and you have the final say.
No more feud goes with what you were saying, right?
BTW, no one has called me smarty pants since about 8:00 this morning:-)
Good luck, sincerely.
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If l didn't know you well enough,i wouldn't give you a hard time haha! ' No more feud, sound ok then?
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
You did an awesome job, Mystery Author, with your contest
entry. Great job with the syllable count per line. I loved the
end rhymes--they were an added bonus. Your words were
well thought out and contained a super message. Yes, Jude
took the high road and didn't retaliate. He even showed by
example how to react to being bullied.
Thanks for sharing and best wishes in the contest, Jan
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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You did an awesome job, Mystery Author, with your contest
entry. Great job with the syllable count per line. I loved the
end rhymes--they were an added bonus. Your words were
well thought out and contained a super message. Yes, Jude
took the high road and didn't retaliate. He even showed by
example how to react to being bullied.
Thanks for sharing and best wishes in the contest, Jan
Comment Written 24-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 24-Feb-2023
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His Jan, I thank you so very much for your kindness for my Hey Jude Poem, and always being so thoughtful in your reviews. Thanks also for your gift of six stars! Your kind words are always so appreciated.
