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Lessons Learned and Spiritual

Viewing comments for Chapter 22 "Forgiving Cheaters"
Do good and feel good poems

46 total reviews 
Comment from harmony13
Excellent
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The author's poem words are alarming. This does go on! I liked the descriptions and excuses the author chose for examples. Thank you for the author's notes - they are so true and give great advice! The artwork is awesome! The song was perfect and went well with the words and theme of this poem. Great Poem!

 Comment Written 28-Jan-2023


reply by the author on 31-Jan-2023
    Maria, you are so right about how bad cheating is for the innocent spouse and also the children. That is why I chose this subject, as I have a friend who committed suicide after she found out that her 40 yr marriage was a lie.
    I hope you know how much your awesome review means to me. Thank you so much for your very kind words for my poem. They are so appreciated, my dear friend!
Comment from royowen
Excellent
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I think we are quite definitely surrounded by people to whom this has happened. I've been quite fortunate, I married in my thirties, had two children, but our marriage has lasted many years. This is generally in heptametric couplets, very smooth, and with strong expressive laguage, beautifully written my friend, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 28-Jan-2023


reply by the author on 31-Jan-2023
    Roy,, cheating is so hard on the innocent spouse and also the children. That is why I chose this subject, as I have a friend who committed suicide after she found out that her 40 yr marriage was a lie.
    I hope you know how much your awesome review means to me. Thank you so much for your very kind words for my poem. They are so appreciated, my dear friend!
reply by royowen on 01-Feb-2023
    Yes, it is tragic
Comment from Douglas Goff
Excellent
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Oh my! You made a very serious issue humorous.

One fine tune: I would consider dropping the 'A' in the sentence below. Makes it funnier:

next? A Santa's elf

The final line is great!

 Comment Written 28-Jan-2023


reply by the author on 31-Jan-2023
    Douglas, cheating is so hard on the innocent spouse and children. That is why I chose this subject, as I have a friend who committed suicide after she found out that her 40 yr marriage was a lie.
    I hope you know how much your awesome review means to me. Thank you so much for your very kind words for my poem. They are so appreciated, my dear friend!
Comment from LJbutterfly
Excellent
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Oh Nooo! Who can ever forget Lorena Bobbitt. There were women who wished they had her nerve and determination, and felt she put a stop to her husband's cheating ways. Your poem tells a story rich in imagery and rhymes. It humorously includes a threat, but also forgiveness. This sounds like the winner. Best wishes in the contest.

 Comment Written 28-Jan-2023


reply by the author on 31-Jan-2023
    Lorraine, , you are so right about how bad cheating is for the innocent spouse and also the children. That is why I chose this subject, as I have a friend who committed suicide after she found out that her 40 yr marriage was a lie.
    I hope you know how much your awesome review means to me. Thank you so much for your very kind words for my poem. They are so appreciated, my dear friend!
Comment from Sandra Nelms-Ludwig
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is a great entry into the "Forgiveness" contest. You, unknown author, get my last six for the week. The text is a great size. The message is clearly stated and easily understood. Your rhyme scheme is on point. I would remove grass here} your.......grass and put ass. Ass shows the anger much better. Besides it's used in the bible too. lol
I must say you are a better woman than me. The cad would have been gone a lot sooner with me. Your visual is okay. I feel it is too abstract for such a concrete, "in your face with facts" poem. A visual of an angry looking woman would be better. I get my images by typing in my search engine~ Free images of whatever I am looking for. I download it to my compute and upload it here on the site.
You should place in the top three if not first. Shucks, I would vote for this poem. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 28-Jan-2023


reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
    Sandra, I just love you. Thank you so much! So I have to ask if you got my other line that said, "I guarantee that it will be your last ..... deception. Rhyming with infection, meant to be erection. Lol!! Maybe I better just start with Ass. Yeah, I get almost all of my photos from google or other search engines, as they are great. I haven't used my granddaughter's art for a while, so thought I would use it, but unfortunately I haven't felt the YES!! that I usually feel with my visual. As great as her art is, this just wasn't it. I agree.
    I just absolutely love when I am so iffy on something and someone like you, comes on and confirms my feelings. That is the greatest gift I can get from a reviewer. All of your feedback is a gift my sweet friend. Always. Thank you.

    In fact because of a review that you did last week that confirmed a few things that I was feeling, I already planned on surprising you with a nomination when they get replenished. SURPRISE! a little early. Haha!

    And yes, if I was married to someone like this, the guy would have been sent packing or the Lorena Bobbitt would have come out a long time ago. I am actually married to a great guy and am so blessed. But I wrote this to bring awareness that these kinds of marriages do exist and many times the woman has no way out and no place to go.

    Thank you for all the lovely comments and for those shiny six stars that help us so much. Thank you once again for your valuable feedback and most of all my sweet friend, thank you for being you. Love your latest picture too!
reply by Sandra Nelms-Ludwig on 28-Jan-2023
    Woman, that last line in your poem did make me chuckle. I think you should put erection in the poem because it goes well with the last line. Erection isn't a bad word. It's the actual occurrence. You are most welcome for the sixes. It's just a great poem Sweet unknown person. I give my sixes to the writings I wish I had penned. To be fair I will read the other entries, but they better come with it to beat you. I predict now you will place in the top three. Hope you find a great visual. Have a blessed weekend.
reply by Sandra Nelms-Ludwig on 28-Jan-2023
    You found a PERFECT Visual!!!!😃
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
    Hahahaha! I will try to muster up some courage for that erection post. You are so funny. I did find a photo that I thought worked well. It is nice that you are always offered hundreds of them when you search with just the right words, but I wanted to show an actual cheater caught. I also changed a whole line. The stanza that said, 'you say it is addiction, you just can't help yourself" "But you already did that, what's next? Santa's elf". Well I changed the last line to, "You helped yourself to others, and stored me way back on a shelf"
    Thanks again Sandra!
reply by Sandra Nelms-Ludwig on 28-Jan-2023
    NAH, on second thought after reading it, I would leave it deception. It rings true to your voice. Erection rings true to my voice as a writer. I love all the changes you made. It made your piece even stronger. I think Nomi read your poem and got inspired to write one about a cheater too. Go to his page and read it.
reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
    Yeah he gave a six right before you did and then he said he was going to throw his hat in the ring too. I just love that guy. He is a sweetheart too.
reply by Sandra Nelms-Ludwig on 28-Jan-2023
    I don't think he entered. I think he just wrote the poem. You have a winner!
Comment from nomi338
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I do not know you, but I believe every word you wrote. If this fool does not get the message, he just might be the next to get smote. This awesome poem reminds me of a poem I wrote a few years ago I called it "Reap what you sow" I think I will enter it into the contest.

 Comment Written 28-Jan-2023


reply by the author on 31-Jan-2023
    Nomi, you are so right about how bad cheating is for the innocent spouse and also the children. That is why I chose this subject, as I have a friend who committed suicide after she found out that her 40 yr marriage was a lie.
    I hope you know how much your awesome review means to me. Thank you so much for your very kind words for my poem. They are so appreciated, my dear friend! I will look you up and your poem as soon as I can give my identity!
reply by nomi338 on 01-Feb-2023
    I entered another poem of mine that is similar. It is entitled 3AM In The Morning. It is currently up for review.
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2023
    Yes I know and I am so excited to review it, as I have read it three times already!
    I loved it dear dear friend!
Comment from Jim Wile
Excellent
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A fun poem, especially the ending. Great artwork too. The rhyming was good, but the meter could use some work. Like the second line of the poem, it is mostly iambic heptameter (dit-da dit-da dit-da dit-da dit-da dit-da dit da) which is probably my favorite meter for poems, but it is pretty inconsistent throughout and consequently doesn't flow very well. If you make it your goal to try to stick to that, poetry sounds much better.

For example, instead of:

made me feel like I should be, the one to say I'm sorry
I walked the floors all night and did nothin but worry

try this instead:

You made me feel like I should be the one to say I'm sorry
I walked the floors all night and couldn't do a thing but worry

Also, instead of:

You must feel so entitled; giving yourself one big pass
If you try to cheat again, you're right out on your.......grass

try this instead:

You must feel so entitled, and you give yourself a pass.
Try cheating once again, and you are right out on your.......grass.

It's not that hard; you just have to be aware of it.

 Comment Written 28-Jan-2023


reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
    Thank you so much Jim!!! I am known for my meter, and someone in a private message tried to talk me into shorter lines and to do something different. I actually just started on that one and went to get some coffee and I am going to go back and change my lines back because I should not have second guessed myself in the first place. Thank you my dear friend. You are Alie some.
Comment from Janet Foor
Excellent
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Excellent satire poem. Sadly, the deception is real. Perfect artwork - your granddaughter is talented too.
Loved the last line and of course you can't go wrong with Garth!

Blessings
Janet

 Comment Written 28-Jan-2023


reply by the author on 31-Jan-2023
    Janet, you are so right about how bad cheating is for the innocent spouse and also the children. That is why I chose this subject, as I have a friend who committed suicide after she found out that her 40 yr marriage was a lie.
    I hope you know how much your awesome review means to me. Thank you so much for your very kind words for my poem. They are so appreciated, my dear friend!
Comment from Terry Broxson
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

LOL, I love that you wrote a fictional satire for this contest. I don't have any sixes in the bucket.

This is very clever, fun, and creative. It also occurred to me that there is a very fine line between forgiveness and revenge.

If he does it again, she will not forgive but take her vengeance with a pound of flesh! (Okay, maybe not quite a pound in this case.)

Thank you for entering the contest, and best of luck. Terry.


 Comment Written 28-Jan-2023


reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
    Thanks Terry, I just woke up and after working to get my poem out half the night, I found a number of mistakes I made and just got back from fixing them, I must have fallen asleep and had a little problem editing in that mode!
    Actually surprised there wasn't more. Thanks for the kind comments!
Comment from Ginda Simpson
Excellent
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I am having a very hard time reading this script on the bright yellow background. It is way too small and may be keeping others from reading what is a very good poem. Please enlarge. Looks much better with this change.

 Comment Written 28-Jan-2023


reply by the author on 28-Jan-2023
    Hi Ginda, I changed it to make it easier to read, and hope it makes it easier. I understand as I also have visual problems that make everything blurry and am awaiting two separate eye surgeries. So thank you for letting me know about the font, the size and the background. Please try again and let me know if the changes helped. I truly appreciate you letting me know kind friend.