Death By Murder
Viewing comments for Chapter 18 "Death By Murder - Chap 18"A jewel heist, rival gangs and a cold case.
17 total reviews
Comment from Carol Clark2
It seems that Hank and Emmy arrived just in time to inspect the mysterious package. Hank certainly made Sandy nervous! Good dialogue throughout. Have a blessed week. Carol
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2022
  |
It seems that Hank and Emmy arrived just in time to inspect the mysterious package. Hank certainly made Sandy nervous! Good dialogue throughout. Have a blessed week. Carol
Comment Written 30-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2022
-
Sorry for another delay but life threw me a curve and I ended up on a plane to North Carolina and my grandchildren. Surgery for one and Nana's care for the others. Settling down now for a few days so I wanted to make sure I thanked everyone for reading and commenting on the stories. I truly appreciate your time and comments... Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from Ric Myworld
You sprinkle clues around like dipping on ice cream and your hints put a reader's mind in overdrive. Most of the time, making him/her to just to conclusions that seldom if ever right. LOL. Thanks for sharing
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2022
|
You sprinkle clues around like dipping on ice cream and your hints put a reader's mind in overdrive. Most of the time, making him/her to just to conclusions that seldom if ever right. LOL. Thanks for sharing
Comment Written 30-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2022
-
Sorry for another delay but life threw me a curve and I ended up on a plane to North Carolina and my grandchildren. Surgery for one and Nana's care for the others. Settling down now for a few days so I wanted to make sure I thanked everyone for reading and commenting on the stories. I truly appreciate your time and comments... Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from lyenochka
What a long night for poor Cooper! More mysteries one after another! I hope Hank will be able to open that box safely. I feel sorry for Sandy, fearing for her life. And it's good that Emmy noticed Costello's car and driver at the hospital. Hope they call in the police before Costello finishes off Rudy! Some scary stuff here with well done dialogue. I especially liked that Hank's love of cars will have to depend on Emmy's snow driving smarts.
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2022
|
What a long night for poor Cooper! More mysteries one after another! I hope Hank will be able to open that box safely. I feel sorry for Sandy, fearing for her life. And it's good that Emmy noticed Costello's car and driver at the hospital. Hope they call in the police before Costello finishes off Rudy! Some scary stuff here with well done dialogue. I especially liked that Hank's love of cars will have to depend on Emmy's snow driving smarts.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2022
-
Sorry for another delay but life threw me a curve and I ended up on a plane to North Carolina and my grandchildren. Surgery for one and Nana's care for the others. Settling down now for a few days so I wanted to make sure I thanked everyone for reading and commenting on the stories. I truly appreciate your time and comments... Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Nearly missed this one, Carol, I'm so sorry I'm late. I'm struggling with my writing at the moment. Just staring at an empty page. Anyway, this is another wonderful chapter in your book. I have to feel sorry for Sandy, (I'm called Sandy) she'd nice and just wants to run her business. Now I'm wandering what did they find in that parcel? Hank and Emmy stopped us finding out!! Well done again, my friend. Another amazing chapter. Love and hugs. Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2022
 |
Nearly missed this one, Carol, I'm so sorry I'm late. I'm struggling with my writing at the moment. Just staring at an empty page. Anyway, this is another wonderful chapter in your book. I have to feel sorry for Sandy, (I'm called Sandy) she'd nice and just wants to run her business. Now I'm wandering what did they find in that parcel? Hank and Emmy stopped us finding out!! Well done again, my friend. Another amazing chapter. Love and hugs. Sandra xxx
Comment Written 30-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2022
-
No need to apologize to this old lady... I am so far behind that even the tortoise and the hare would speed right by me. LOL Though today is mine and you know where I will be... sitting right here and enjoying every moment of it.
Love you and thank you for every moment you support me.
Hugs, Carol
Comment from Shirley McLain
I am enjoying reading this story. I wish I could get more of it at one time. I always want things I can't have. :) You did a great job, and I'm always ready to read more. Shirley
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2022
|
I am enjoying reading this story. I wish I could get more of it at one time. I always want things I can't have. :) You did a great job, and I'm always ready to read more. Shirley
Comment Written 28-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2022
-
Sorry for another delay but life threw me a curve and I ended up on a plane to North Carolina and my grandchildren. Surgery for one and Nana's care for the others. Settling down now for a few days so I wanted to make sure I thanked everyone for reading and commenting on the stories. I truly appreciate your time and comments... Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from LJbutterfly
Things are starting to take shape. We get to see Hank and Emmy in action working together. Emmy is quite observant, the way she noticed the coffee mugs and the expensive black bag tucked in with the liquor bottles. You came up with great questions for Hank to ask. I like the way you've given all the characters various personalities. It means you've studied and observed people, which makes your stories more realistic and interesting. I'll see you in the next chapter.
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2022
|
Things are starting to take shape. We get to see Hank and Emmy in action working together. Emmy is quite observant, the way she noticed the coffee mugs and the expensive black bag tucked in with the liquor bottles. You came up with great questions for Hank to ask. I like the way you've given all the characters various personalities. It means you've studied and observed people, which makes your stories more realistic and interesting. I'll see you in the next chapter.
Comment Written 28-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2022
-
Sorry for another delay but life threw me a curve and I ended up on a plane to North Carolina and my grandchildren. Surgery for one and Nana's care for the others. Settling down now for a few days so I wanted to make sure I thanked everyone for reading and commenting on the stories. I truly appreciate your time and comments... Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment from karenina
Alrighty then! So, I'll just clean the house tomorrow! I have to say as much as I don't like falling behind (or in this case, my personal hack attack reason for not being on-site) ~ it is very illuminating to read this in one sitting and follow your author's mind, learning the ropes, and smiling at your mental gymnastics! I was just plain cheering for Emmy as she made all those detective observations -- e.g. coffee cups, bag stuffed between the bottles, and so forth. Poor Sandy never had a chance with Emmy and Lance double teaming her! She would have crumbled on the witness stand! You may have taken some time due to multiple family issues, Carol, but you haven't lost a step! This has been a fun, interesting, curious, adventurous read with equal parts "bruisers" and "flirtations." Bravo! I saved my six for the last chapter...I know my budget! Please apply them to all preceding chapters, as I have in my heart, my friend!
Karenina
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2022
|
Alrighty then! So, I'll just clean the house tomorrow! I have to say as much as I don't like falling behind (or in this case, my personal hack attack reason for not being on-site) ~ it is very illuminating to read this in one sitting and follow your author's mind, learning the ropes, and smiling at your mental gymnastics! I was just plain cheering for Emmy as she made all those detective observations -- e.g. coffee cups, bag stuffed between the bottles, and so forth. Poor Sandy never had a chance with Emmy and Lance double teaming her! She would have crumbled on the witness stand! You may have taken some time due to multiple family issues, Carol, but you haven't lost a step! This has been a fun, interesting, curious, adventurous read with equal parts "bruisers" and "flirtations." Bravo! I saved my six for the last chapter...I know my budget! Please apply them to all preceding chapters, as I have in my heart, my friend!
Karenina
Comment Written 28-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2022
-
Thank you, my love, for taking the time to read all the chapters thus far and to enjoy what I have to offer. It means so much because I honestly believed I wouldn't be able to write again. You have no idea how many days I sat staring at the computer and got up and walked away without the desire to write. I've been blessed to be able to return and blessed even more knowing that others are enjoying the story, flaws and all.
I appreciate you so much and of course all your comments and stars. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Smiles, hugs and love,
Carol
-
GREAT! Stop here and I am delighted to accept this response as for every other review thus far! I was thrilled to carve out a chunk of time and ride the ride with you! We all have doubts about writing... The proof, as they say, is in the pudding! You've still got it, kiddo!
-
Thank you! I sure hope so!
-
I love these instantaneous responses! You're making ME laugh!
-
As long as it is with me and not at me!
-
Oh! Never. You know better, I hope...
-
Yes I do! You are good for me... put me in my place when necessary, but you do it ever so gently.... or is that because you don't want to clean up the mess if I shatter to pieces?
-
Geez. I've never been good at putting people in places...
It's not my style. I hope to always merely offer gentle suggestions as courteously as possible.
It's what I appreciate and what I TRY to accomplish.
(I occasionally ruffle a feather or two, but it's never my intention!)
-
My sweet friend, you could never hurt anyone ... maybe not even when they hurt you!
-
That particular theory is being tested even as we speak. I'm trying my best to quell my invectives. Ah, life!
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
This is a well-written chapter with lots of questions to keep the readers reading. There are a few suggestions you might consider. In para 5 replace "his mother" with her as you are going to identify her as his mother three words later. Porsche is misspelled when he is at a red light. Sandy felt an icy . . . You have kept yourself to the detectives' POV and it might be better not to head hop to a suspicious person. Head hopping is becoming more commonly accepted but it can get confusing. One of the cops could mention to the other that she/he thought Sandy might have the shivers. Makes her a little more suspicious also. I'm looking forward to the next chapter.
|
This is a well-written chapter with lots of questions to keep the readers reading. There are a few suggestions you might consider. In para 5 replace "his mother" with her as you are going to identify her as his mother three words later. Porsche is misspelled when he is at a red light. Sandy felt an icy . . . You have kept yourself to the detectives' POV and it might be better not to head hop to a suspicious person. Head hopping is becoming more commonly accepted but it can get confusing. One of the cops could mention to the other that she/he thought Sandy might have the shivers. Makes her a little more suspicious also. I'm looking forward to the next chapter.
Comment Written 27-Nov-2022
Comment from Wendy G
Good that they saw Peter Costello's car, and very observant to notice the used coffee cups - it would have been better for Sandy just to get them a coffee rather than say she doesn't have any. Now she's given them a clue that she's holding back information. I think she needs to tell them everything - she's be safer if the detectives knew. Well written Carol.
Wendy
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2022
|
Good that they saw Peter Costello's car, and very observant to notice the used coffee cups - it would have been better for Sandy just to get them a coffee rather than say she doesn't have any. Now she's given them a clue that she's holding back information. I think she needs to tell them everything - she's be safer if the detectives knew. Well written Carol.
Wendy
Comment Written 27-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2022
-
Thank you so much for your support, Wendy and for always continuing to follow my writing. Sorry for the delay in responding but I shall try to do better.
Have a great day!
Carol
Comment from royowen
Ah, Hank and Emmy see Peter Costello cruising and being around the hospital, they grow suspicious, they wonder what he's doing there. They interview Sandy in her bar, and see if she knows about Rudy's beating, she does, he asked about Costello on a whim, she betrays herself a little, they head for the O'Hara dwelling, well done, great writing Carol, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2022
|
Ah, Hank and Emmy see Peter Costello cruising and being around the hospital, they grow suspicious, they wonder what he's doing there. They interview Sandy in her bar, and see if she knows about Rudy's beating, she does, he asked about Costello on a whim, she betrays herself a little, they head for the O'Hara dwelling, well done, great writing Carol, blessings Roy
Comment Written 27-Nov-2022
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2022
-
Thank you so much for your support, Roy and for always continuing to follow my writing. Sorry for the delay in responding but I shall try to do better.
Have a great day!
Carol
-
Always a pleasure Carol
