Reviews from

Approaching Storms

a Kyrielle poetic form

46 total reviews 
Comment from Paul McFarland
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Very nice, Melissa. I've never tried a Kyrielle. Yours is very well done. The flow is smooth, the rhyme is excellent, and a pleasure to read. I am going to become a fan.

 Comment Written 05-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 05-Jun-2022
    Thank you Paul for your wonderful review. I am glad you liked this Kyrielle. I thought I would take this style out and dust it off. :)

    Melissa
Comment from Whitewave
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Sugarray77,
This is a clever example of the Kyrielle poetic form and an amazing picture to complement your words - 'The boiling clouds can't hold the strain...'
Lightning explosions and growling thunder, that announce an imminent storm, are some of the most fascinating signs and sounds of nature. You have described it all.

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 05-Jun-2022
    Thank you so much for the wonderful review!! Much appreciated.

    Melissa
Comment from tempeste
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Ciao Sugarray!

I love stormy weather so the artwork I found alluring.

You describe well step by step the effects of an in coming storm matching strong descriptive words

My favourite verse is the last one.. thunder snd lighting are common themes and you did a great job describing them but I love the detail about the rain and how :

Loud thuds of droplets hit the dust;
flung out before a windy gust.

And then

Sporadic spatters strike my pane...
approaching sounds of coming rain.

Great detail

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 05-Jun-2022
    Hello dear Franca. Thanks so much for your wonderful review. I hoped to share the tension of an approaching storm. I also love stormy days and listen to each sound it makes. :). Thanks again.

    Melissa
reply by tempeste on 12-Jun-2022
    Ciao!

    Your morning glory has two votes now! ( smile)
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2022
    You are adorable, Franca. Hugs!
Comment from Heather Knight
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I love the image you paint here. Besides I admire your ability to rhyme. You say in your profile you've learned to write like this in just four years!
The word meter is a mystery to me. So are rhyme and rhythm.
I tried to rhyme in the past, but I've given up. I'd compare my few tries to an elephant playing violin.
Congrats!

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2022
    Hello Heather... I am grinning as I write this because of your comparison to an elephant. So funny. I had no clue about meter, rhythm, etc. til I came to FS. My son gifted me a 3 month subscription and I was hooked. I have taken the poetry classes offered here and they have helped immensely. Don't give up on meter... it is a pattern. Iambic is in a unstressed / stressed pattern. Just listen for the more pronounced... stressed ... syllables. Thanks so much!

    Melissa
reply by Heather Knight on 05-Jun-2022
    Hi again Melissa,
    It's not exactly that I've given up, but I have kind of found my niche: short stories and free verse (the second one not very good).
    It could be because I'm impatient and I hate rules, who knows. I also love flash fiction. Does that mean I'm lazy? :)
    Hugs
Comment from Anne Johnston
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Good rhyming, and easy to read. Well done on this poem. Your well-chosen words built up to the climax of the storm as it approaches. Great picture you have chosen to illustrate.

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2022
    Thanks so much Anne. I appreciate your lovely comments.

    Melissa
reply by Anne Johnston on 04-Jun-2022
    You are welcome
Comment from rspoet
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hello Melissa,
You've written a marvelous Kyrielle with wonderful description
of the gusts and rain of the storm.
Excellent rhymes and very good meter.
The repeat line blends nicely.
I might have used "roiling" rather than "boiling," but both work well.
Perfect picture too.
Well done.
Best wishes.
Robert

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2022
    Hi Robert. I am grinning as I read... I'm so glad you liked it. I always value your take on my writing. I chose boiling because the last time I wrote a storm poem I used roiling, so thought I would change up a bit. Thanks so much.

    Melissa
Comment from harmony13
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

The author's words are alarming, descriptive, clear and creative. I pondered on the words of this poem, as today, we are expecting a storm here in Florida! The poem flows and connects well. The artwork is
awesome and compliments both the theme and words of this poem.
Hi Melissa, I hope you are doing well - have a great weekend!...Maria

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2022
    Hello Maria. Thanks so much for the lovely review. Hope your storm in Florida is milder than the one I wrote about here. Stay safe.

    Melissa
Comment from NANCY V. FORREST
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

What a well crafted poem. It must have been quite a challenge. I love the illustration and the word images that capture a coming storm with such clarity and feeling.

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2022
    Hi Nancy. Thanks so very much for the lovely review. I am delighted that you liked it :)

    Melissa
reply by NANCY V. FORREST on 05-Jun-2022
    :-)
Comment from Mark D. R.
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

OK Melissa, I rarely review long verses, but with my poem buddies I often read the same.

This is truly exquisite writing and only corroborates that my own writing is not classical poetry and that in this lifetime I will not attempt the same LOL

Just maybe I could try one four-line stanza in the Kyrielle style, but I doubt it. I will leave it to you to continue to impress me with your poetry!

Mark

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2022
    Hi there Mark. Thanks so very much. I am tickled that you liked my writing and this kyrielle form. I KNOW you could write a lovely one if you tried. Thanks again, my friend.

    Melissa
reply by Mark D. R. on 04-Jun-2022
    M,

    I am not trying. I will leave it to you!

    M
Comment from leather
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Unlike some people, I generally like to watch storms--not the hurricane type, just normal ones. There is just something awesome about the sounds and sights. They usually prompt me to check my battery supply. I loved your poem too.

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2022


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2022
    Thanks so much for the review!!!

    Melissa