And Then I Blinked
This wasn't supposed to happen so fast93 total reviews
Comment from oliver818
This is a nice summary of your family life and a very good entry for this competition. I like the way you work the blink into it, it's so true that life speeds up and passes in the blink of an eye. Thanks for sharing this and have a really great day.
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2022
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This is a nice summary of your family life and a very good entry for this competition. I like the way you work the blink into it, it's so true that life speeds up and passes in the blink of an eye. Thanks for sharing this and have a really great day.
Comment Written 30-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2022
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Thank you Oliver, for your kind review & words of encouragement. "And then I blinked!" may have been a more & accurate title, as I was truly trying to show how entirely fast it all went since I got married. Thanks again & God Bless!
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
This is a well-thought-out poem that has too much truth about our lives. Days did seem endless when we were young. Time passes with just a blink now that I am old. The one thing I don't understand is the commas in the middle of many the lines seem to interrupt the thought instead of separating clauses or something.
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2022
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This is a well-thought-out poem that has too much truth about our lives. Days did seem endless when we were young. Time passes with just a blink now that I am old. The one thing I don't understand is the commas in the middle of many the lines seem to interrupt the thought instead of separating clauses or something.
Comment Written 30-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2022
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Thank you Carol, for your kind review & words of encouragement. "And then I blinked!" may have been a more & accurate title, as I was truly trying to show how entirely fast it all went since I got married. The thing about my commas; is that it shows where the reader should pause and put emphasis on certain parts of the poem. That was instilled into me from the time I was up to my college classes. My professors would grade it down without it, but maybe things have changed since then. I maybe should look into that. But I do truly appreciate your honest review, as I welcome any suggestions. Thanks again & God Bless!
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I am not a poet, so I appreciate your explanation about those commas. If one of the poets says something, it may have changed.
Comment from lancellot
Hmm, this is interesting. It includes a family and the narration is of someone who grows and family grows around them. Is it about family? Maybe, but it feels surface level. I think it meets the contest rules. And the end rhymes and near rhymes are nice.
good luck.
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reply by the author on 31-Mar-2022
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Hmm, this is interesting. It includes a family and the narration is of someone who grows and family grows around them. Is it about family? Maybe, but it feels surface level. I think it meets the contest rules. And the end rhymes and near rhymes are nice.
good luck.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 31-Mar-2022
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I know what your saying, as it maybe doesn't capture my usual gushy way of writing poetry. However I tried to say that I felt when I blinked; all the love,
diapers, 2AM feedings, broken hearts when the kids broke up with someone were all vanished, except for my memories, I knew everyone else would capture that, but for me I needed to remind people to not take a minute for granted; cuz then you blink and it's gone. I thank you Sir L for your awesome feedback & your kind review. God Bless!
