Reviews from

An eye for an eye

no mercy in real wartime

5 total reviews 
Comment from Sally Law
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is wonderful writing, dear Cass! How great to see you engaged in this contest. This is very authentic, gruesome, as war is, and ended in the most graphic way. A winner here in my eyes.

Sending you my best today as always and best wishes for the vote,
Sal XOs

 Comment Written 31-Jan-2022


reply by the author on 31-Jan-2022
    Dear Sally, Thank you for your review and the five stars. Thank you also for your generous remarks regarding my story "An Eye for an Eye." It is graphic as you say, because war is war. This came about after one night when my father came home "as full as a goog" and actually spoke of some of his wartime experiences. Even in the state he was in, he didn't go into details, but my mother and I got the idea of what he was saying. We never found out what it was that prompted his disclosures that night, and he only ever did it once again. cheers Cass
Comment from The Mom/DarleneThomson
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Dear Cass,
I read your wartime story and enjoyed it. It appears to meet all the contest rules. I appreciate that there is no blood & gore like another that I read. It appears believable. Great writing job. Best wishes in the contest.
Blessings,
Darlene

 Comment Written 27-Jan-2022


reply by the author on 28-Jan-2022
    Dear Darlene, Thank you for you review and the AWESOME SIX STARS. This story came from a very brief wartime remeniscence of my father's. He came home one Saturday night, "as full as a goog" and actually talked to us about his wartime days.
    The German in question did end up in a POW camp and was repatriated back to Germany in 1946. "Clarrie" is actually my father "Harry". cheers Cass

reply by The Mom/DarleneThomson on 29-Jan-2022
    Dear Cass,
    Wow, a true story told with class. great job.
    Blessings,
    Darlene
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

That really is a war story and you're right, that wartime did not allow for compassion or pity. It's admirable that Clarrie would lie to be younger in order to serve. Best wishes in the contest!

 Comment Written 27-Jan-2022


reply by the author on 28-Jan-2022
    Dear Friend, Thankyou for your review and the five stars. Clarrie's motives for putting his age down to join up weren't really that noble. He was afraid that people would brand him with "the white feather". This did still happen in those days of WW2.
Comment from Susan Newell
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

You tell a compelling story with good use of language. I liked the wink. I think you could use a few paragraph breaks for easier reading. I had to take a leap of faith that Clarrie was a football quarterback or baseball outfielder, because snipers aren't usually within grenade range. But so be it. I made one note.

His eyes met the sergeants ==> sergeant's

 Comment Written 27-Jan-2022


reply by the author on 27-Jan-2022
    Dear Susan, Thank you for your review and the five stars. Yes, I noted the needed apostrophe. I have finally finished this story and have noted your comments on the distance between Clarrie and the sniper. I envisaged him to be fairly close at that stage, so a long throw wasn't really required. However it does behoove the writer to present situations to the reader that are at least credible, so I appreciate your comments.
reply by Susan Newell on 28-Jan-2022
    You are welcome. "Sniper" seems to imply long distance. Perhaps marksman or rifleman would work. I know they used to shoot from the cover of bunkers. ???
Comment from RodG
Good
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Your war story is definitely unromanticized as we see how callous the sergeant and Clarry can be after the German sniper surrendered. I think the ending is plausible, but not Clarry's grenade toss. He'd have to be an NFL quarterback to take out a sniper who's probably shooting from 100 yards away.

 Comment Written 27-Jan-2022


reply by the author on 27-Jan-2022
    Dear Rod, Thank you for your review and the accompanying stars. Your comments regarding the distance between the sniper and Clarrie being impossible to manage are reasonable and fair game. But, supposing the sniper was closer. Much closer. 50 yards perhaps. It would make a difference. Wouldn't it ?
reply by RodG on 27-Jan-2022
    Can one easily LOB a grenade 50 yards? That?s half a football field. Fifty FEET maybe.