Comment from dmt1967

Excellent

Both men (were quiet as they rolled their recent discoveries around in their heads.) This, to me, sounds very jerky and telling. (remained silent as the recent events occupied their thoughts.)

Thank you for sharing and take care.

 Comment Written 04-Nov-2021

---

reply by the author on 11-Nov-2021

i am struggling with my writing and the "family" so I will re-read and try to adjust. Thanks--Carol

Comment from karenina

Excellent

This is the thing with criminals. They think of the big things bit overlook the small...
Young staff with keen eyes, A distinctive ring, A trail to another club...

Not sure who is pulling the strings yet...but hey, how about we stroll back for more pastry and muse on it?

(Yum)

Karenina

 Comment Written 01-Nov-2021

---

reply by the author on 11-Nov-2021

I apologize that life has put me so far behind. I appreciate your thoughts and time.

Hugs, Carol

Comment from LJbutterfly

Excellent

I call each chapter and episode because I feel like I'm watching a movie or miniseries. Your characters are well developed and real and work well together. Selene and Thomas provided phenomenal information and we will see where their clues lead the FBI.

 Comment Written 31-Oct-2021

---

reply by the author on 11-Nov-2021

I apologize that life has put me so far behind. I appreciate your thoughts and time.

Hugs, Carol

Comment from Elizabeth Emerald

Excellent

Brilliant, Carol! You are a criminal mastermind--thankfully, you use your diabolical talents for writing terrific thrillers.


Thomas with his binoculars, [honing=>HOMING] in on the ring

 Comment Written 31-Oct-2021

---

reply by the author on 11-Nov-2021

I apologize that life has put me so far behind. I appreciate your thoughts and time.

Hugs, Carol

Comment from Iza Deleanu

Excellent

Ha, ha, ha the cones are searching for clue in hope of a reward or a job with the Police. Did i get it right?Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings.

 Comment Written 31-Oct-2021

---

reply by the author on 11-Nov-2021

I apologize that life has put me so far behind. I appreciate your thoughts and time.

Hugs, Carol

reply by Iza Deleanu on 14-Nov-2021

No worries:)

Comment from lyenochka

Excellent

Good call by Garth to make sure the two young informants are safe. Did Garth notice if the sheriff was wearing a ring like that? I wouldn't trust the sheriff either!

Question: Who needed a glass of Perrier? Selene? Was she working?
I needed a glass of Perrier, and I remember commenting on the ring.

 Comment Written 30-Oct-2021

---

reply by the author on 11-Nov-2021

I apologize that life has put me so far behind. I appreciate your thoughts and time.

Hugs, Carol

Comment from Ulla

Excellent

Hi Carol. This is turning into a great story. I love it. Now, the big question on is. Who can we trust and who can we not. So back to pastry shop to think it all through. It's wonderful writing. Ulla:)))

 Comment Written 30-Oct-2021

---

reply by the author on 30-Oct-2021

Great idea... I could use one of those chocolate desserts right about now. Five granddaughters running about like mad. We settled for baking blueberry muffins though.

I am so pleased to have you following my story. Hope I haven't missed another chapter of yours. I really am enjoying it.

Hugs, Carol

reply by Ulla on 30-Oct-2021

I don't think you have. A new chapter coming up tomorrow. 😊😊

reply by the author on 30-Oct-2021

Great! I look forward to reading it. have a wonderful day!

reply by Ulla on 30-Oct-2021

Thanks, same to you.

Comment from Judy Lawless

Excellent

Keep them coming, Carol. This is a sitting-on-the-edge of our seats mystery for sure. Another excellent chapter, and sadly I have no sixes until tomorrow.

One thing: "A distinguishing(distinguished)-looking man came into the restaurant a few nights ago and sat at the bar."

 Comment Written 30-Oct-2021

---

reply by the author on 11-Nov-2021

I apologize that life has put me so far behind. I appreciate your thoughts and time.

Hugs, Carol

Comment from Jasmine Girl

Exceptional

I want to know the reason behind the death of Mary Beth Jacob, who is missing in the character list. Also can we trust Thomas and Selene?

I think I enjoy reading your book and you did a good job moving the story along.

Exceptionally done.

 Comment Written 30-Oct-2021

---

reply by the author on 11-Nov-2021

I apologize that life has put me so far behind. I appreciate your thoughts and time.

Hugs, Carol

Comment from barbara.wilkey

Excellent

We got some leads. GREAT!! I like how this story is coming together.

We got some leads"I don't know his last name, but Caleb throws a dance party every other Wednesday night in this warehouse over on Market Street. He calls it the place to be discovered because every agent in town, every starlet, and everyone who's anyone, is hanging out, trying to make connections."
"Your friend, Kay, might be able to help them. She's the club hostess and decides if you get in or not." Thomas looked for confirmation from Selene. (Two peoples' dialogue. Each person speaking gets their own paragraph.)

I thought it was strange that he didn't even say thank you. (omit 'that')

 Comment Written 30-Oct-2021

---

reply by the author on 30-Oct-2021

Thanks for pointing out my lack of etiquette. I don't know how I forgot the thankyou, but it was an easy fix. And, of course, down seems to be a "part of me," which I struggle to fix. LOL

Thanks for the review and, of course, the help. I depend on you to keep me on the straight and narrow.

Hugs, Carol