The Chronicals Of Bethica: The Rise
Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "The Chronicles Of Bethica"Abram must defeat a deadly humanoid race of beings
9 total reviews
Comment from Ric Myworld
Wow, some mighty fancy descriptive writing that I won't soon forget. As a matter of face, I might have to go back and read this chapter again, something that I seldom to almost never do. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2021
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Wow, some mighty fancy descriptive writing that I won't soon forget. As a matter of face, I might have to go back and read this chapter again, something that I seldom to almost never do. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 13-Jul-2021
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2021
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Yeah, Fantasy has to be action-packed. That's the fun in writing them. Thank you.
Comment from justafan
Other than the first in this series, this is my favorite so far! Brilliant
So many heroes and heroines showing up! I read your work so fast ...I have to go back and read again and again.
I hate waiting!! Lol
Really well done, my friend!
Always
Justafan of yours
Missy
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2021
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Other than the first in this series, this is my favorite so far! Brilliant
So many heroes and heroines showing up! I read your work so fast ...I have to go back and read again and again.
I hate waiting!! Lol
Really well done, my friend!
Always
Justafan of yours
Missy
Comment Written 26-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 26-Jun-2021
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Thank you so much, my dear. I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter. I really appreciate you and so many stars.
Comment from lancellot
Thrilling battle with the undead upon the high seas. Excellent work. I'm glad you took your time building up the suspense before the battle took place. That they survived was a miracle. I'm surprised they made it.
Good work.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2021
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Thrilling battle with the undead upon the high seas. Excellent work. I'm glad you took your time building up the suspense before the battle took place. That they survived was a miracle. I'm surprised they made it.
Good work.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2021
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Thank you. I'm so happy you liked the scenes. I appreciate you very much.
Comment from Judy Lawless
You've done an amazing job with this chapter, Amahra. I have to admit that this kind of fantasy isn't something I enjoy reading, but your imagery, action scenes and emotions expressed are almost believable!
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2021
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You've done an amazing job with this chapter, Amahra. I have to admit that this kind of fantasy isn't something I enjoy reading, but your imagery, action scenes and emotions expressed are almost believable!
Comment Written 21-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2021
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Thank you very much.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I started to read this last night but was too tired and knew I wasn't giving it justice. I am glad I read it with fresh eyes it was well worth it. WOW! you did a fabulous job writing this. The descriptions and the emotions shone through.
Celio and several men bravely walked up and stood next to him, but Dinary ordered them back. (stood beside him, it has to do with definition.)
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2021
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I started to read this last night but was too tired and knew I wasn't giving it justice. I am glad I read it with fresh eyes it was well worth it. WOW! you did a fabulous job writing this. The descriptions and the emotions shone through.
Celio and several men bravely walked up and stood next to him, but Dinary ordered them back. (stood beside him, it has to do with definition.)
Comment Written 21-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2021
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Thank you very much, Barbara.
Comment from Jay Squires
You are the master of suspense and adventure, Amahra. This is stunning writing.
Here are some notes I made as I read:
with other unexplainable events he'd witness at sea over the years. [ ... events he'd WITNESSED at sea ...] I'm sure someone has pointed this out to you by now. I downloaded it early this morning and am just now getting to it (9 PM CA time)]
As the wings flapped, it made both ships rock from side to side. [You've probably pondered over this yourself, but as I see it, it was the flapping of the wings that made the ships rock side to side; therefore shouldn't "it" be changed to "they"?]
looking down upon the men with both swords out to its side [... it should read, either "out to its sides" or "out to either side"]
The fallen men's blood ran along the floorboards like scattered scarlet ribbons. [WOW! What an image!]
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2021
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You are the master of suspense and adventure, Amahra. This is stunning writing.
Here are some notes I made as I read:
with other unexplainable events he'd witness at sea over the years. [ ... events he'd WITNESSED at sea ...] I'm sure someone has pointed this out to you by now. I downloaded it early this morning and am just now getting to it (9 PM CA time)]
As the wings flapped, it made both ships rock from side to side. [You've probably pondered over this yourself, but as I see it, it was the flapping of the wings that made the ships rock side to side; therefore shouldn't "it" be changed to "they"?]
looking down upon the men with both swords out to its side [... it should read, either "out to its sides" or "out to either side"]
The fallen men's blood ran along the floorboards like scattered scarlet ribbons. [WOW! What an image!]
Comment Written 21-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 21-Jun-2021
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Thanks, Jay. I'll revisit what you noted. I appreciate your review and notations.
Comment from Theodore McDowell
Wow. I wish I had a six for this. I'm stepping into the middle of this tale and it immediately grasped my attention and wouldn't let go. the action was intense and fast paced with many interesting twists. I loved it.
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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Wow. I wish I had a six for this. I'm stepping into the middle of this tale and it immediately grasped my attention and wouldn't let go. the action was intense and fast paced with many interesting twists. I loved it.
Comment Written 20-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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Thank you so much. I really appreciate you. I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Comment from forestport12
The carved creature opened its demonic mouth and sucked air into its wooden body. The loud cracking of the wood when it turned its head towards the men sent chills up their spines. Its eyes were the only things not made of wood; they were flesh, black and bulging. So much about your chapter was worthy to note. I just pulled this paragraph out as one of my favorites. What a powerful description. I could just see the fear in their eyes. It put me in there with them. And so many great power verbs, ones that carry a story. Wow. I should pay more attention to your project. Stan aka. Forestport
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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The carved creature opened its demonic mouth and sucked air into its wooden body. The loud cracking of the wood when it turned its head towards the men sent chills up their spines. Its eyes were the only things not made of wood; they were flesh, black and bulging. So much about your chapter was worthy to note. I just pulled this paragraph out as one of my favorites. What a powerful description. I could just see the fear in their eyes. It put me in there with them. And so many great power verbs, ones that carry a story. Wow. I should pay more attention to your project. Stan aka. Forestport
Comment Written 20-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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Thank you, Stan so much. I'm glad you took the time to read and enjoyed it. And I'm flattered for so many stars. I appreciate you.
Comment from royowen
A beautifully described and written episode, just loved the battle imagery you projected in this excellent episode of something akin to the legend of the Flying Dutchman doomed to sail the ocean for eternity. And excellent episode Amahra. Well done, blessings Roy
Typo : The men gasped at Dinary('s) sudden strength,
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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A beautifully described and written episode, just loved the battle imagery you projected in this excellent episode of something akin to the legend of the Flying Dutchman doomed to sail the ocean for eternity. And excellent episode Amahra. Well done, blessings Roy
Typo : The men gasped at Dinary('s) sudden strength,
Comment Written 20-Jun-2021
reply by the author on 20-Jun-2021
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Thank you, Roy. Always a pleasure to read your review. And I made that correction.
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Well done