Reviews from

Within the Bone

Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "An Awakening"
A tale of love, magic, and revenge.

3 total reviews 
Comment from AJ McCall
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Oooh... Mara's power was awakened??!! That's some serious power for a Demon to get excited, lol. So they must break the curse by using Mara's power from the Void? So what about Caliban? I'm sure he's jealous, which is why Sammael suspects he'll rebel. And it's nice to see that Mara and Aalltoar will stick together, they're great friends. I did notice a sentence with an error: --the darkness of his shadow (a) hitting like a falling ton as it covered her.

Actually, I'm not sure if it's an error but it kinda confused me. But everything else very much intriguing!! Can't wait for the next chapter!!

 Comment Written 26-Dec-2020


reply by the author on 26-Dec-2020
    Thanks for spotting that error, I pulled it out. And thank you very much for reading and reviewing. I really, really appreciate it. Caliban?s definitely got the potential to be trouble in the future. Jealous he be, as it were.
reply by AJ McCall on 27-Dec-2020
    Yes, which will make the story better!!! You're very very welcome!
Comment from Goodadvicechan
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

It is a very dramatic experience in reading through the story. You did a good job to create such an atmosphere that there were moments of death or alive; endurance or give up...etc.

Very well done.



 Comment Written 26-Dec-2020


reply by the author on 26-Dec-2020
    Thank you very much for reading and reviewing. I appreciate it!
Comment from Goodadvicechan
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

It is a very dramatic experience in reading through the story. You did a good job to create such an atmosphere that there were moments of death or alive; endurance or give up...etc.

Very well done.



 Comment Written 26-Dec-2020