Internet Affair
Two people met over the Internet.140 total reviews
Comment from gramalot8
Barbara, it is very much an internet dating world. And it can be very scarey. But, if you meet at a bar, is there any more assurance that he's not a serial killer? I don't think so. Nice story line. I look forward to part two.
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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Barbara, it is very much an internet dating world. And it can be very scarey. But, if you meet at a bar, is there any more assurance that he's not a serial killer? I don't think so. Nice story line. I look forward to part two.
Comment Written 15-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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Thank you for your kind review. I agree the Internet or a bar, no difference.
Comment from bhogg
A well written story. You appear to have done your usual job of editing. Now you've created the tension of getting to meet the guy. I guess we have to wait!
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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A well written story. You appear to have done your usual job of editing. Now you've created the tension of getting to meet the guy. I guess we have to wait!
Comment Written 15-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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Thank you for your kind review. I appreciate your support.
Comment from Kathryn Varuzza
Great story.
Interesting.
Suspenseful.
Good inner dialogue.
Good descriptions.
Good balance between the two.
Felt very real.
Great way to end the chapter too.
I can't wait to read the next part.
Great job.
Kathryn
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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Great story.
Interesting.
Suspenseful.
Good inner dialogue.
Good descriptions.
Good balance between the two.
Felt very real.
Great way to end the chapter too.
I can't wait to read the next part.
Great job.
Kathryn
Comment Written 15-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
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you're welcome
Comment from Addy García
very good story keeps us in suspense until the end, it seemed to me I would have liked inconclusive to say that he felt to know. But then I read the notes and I understood so I hope the sequel. He was well-told story.
congratulations.
ADDY GARCIA
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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very good story keeps us in suspense until the end, it seemed to me I would have liked inconclusive to say that he felt to know. But then I read the notes and I understood so I hope the sequel. He was well-told story.
congratulations.
ADDY GARCIA
Comment Written 15-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from jadapenn
Mr Jacob Kraft. Don't think I like the surname, sweetness. Buts that's just me. Now, to evaluate this story. It is totally different from you style and I like it. You have developed some good intrigued and I already feel at home with your heroin. She has insecurities and flaws and is just perfect. Let the show begin!
Luv jada
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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Mr Jacob Kraft. Don't think I like the surname, sweetness. Buts that's just me. Now, to evaluate this story. It is totally different from you style and I like it. You have developed some good intrigued and I already feel at home with your heroin. She has insecurities and flaws and is just perfect. Let the show begin!
Luv jada
Comment Written 15-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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Thank you for your kind review. Jada, What do you mean it's not my style? I am so confused.
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I'm just used to your style being more dialogue driven. This story started on a different note so I can't wait to see what happens next. You have no reason to be confused, I'm admiring a different style as opposed to the other books. It might just be the introduction and hey I said I liked it. Keep on writing and don't imagine that something is wrong with the writing. :) luv ya confused! lol
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I thought her saying all of this out loud would make her look crazy instead of a confused young lady. Most men who reviewed it, did think she was crazy, but the women fully understood it.
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I loved it. Men are toads! Have you ever watched them dress or prepare for a special or unusual occassion - in front of the mirror and stretching their necks as they preen. You go girl, sore foot and all. luv jada
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I am going to e-mail you.
Comment from Ancientmemory1
Well composed short story. I saw no punctuation or grammatical errors within the piece. A nice job building on the anticipation and second thoughts of meeting her internet date. Well done.
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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Well composed short story. I saw no punctuation or grammatical errors within the piece. A nice job building on the anticipation and second thoughts of meeting her internet date. Well done.
Comment Written 15-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from amada
Your story had me in suspense... I was able to know much about laila's character by her doubts and rememberances of the past. Interested in reading the second chapter.
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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Your story had me in suspense... I was able to know much about laila's character by her doubts and rememberances of the past. Interested in reading the second chapter.
Comment Written 15-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from Perp Ihebom
This is a nice piece that is well crafted but the ending is not satisfactory to me. I thought it was a first chapter or part one of a story. I hope there is a sequel. kudos
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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This is a nice piece that is well crafted but the ending is not satisfactory to me. I thought it was a first chapter or part one of a story. I hope there is a sequel. kudos
Comment Written 15-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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This is part one. Part two will come along as soon as I earn enough pumps to post it.
Comment from Mrs Jones
Some of her thoughts you have in quotations and some in italics. I may be wrong, but I think it should all be in italics - at least that is how I was taught. The suspense is ceratainly there and I look forward to the next chapter.
I enjoyed the read.
Cheers
Rose
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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Some of her thoughts you have in quotations and some in italics. I may be wrong, but I think it should all be in italics - at least that is how I was taught. The suspense is ceratainly there and I look forward to the next chapter.
I enjoyed the read.
Cheers
Rose
Comment Written 15-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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All of her thoughts are in italics, she is sometimes saying things out loud. I thought I made that clear. I will recheck. I know when I have internal battles somethings I think and sometimes I say it out loud. Maybe I am strange. Thank you for your review.
Comment from CKLA
Hi Barbara,
I enjoyed this. Her inner turmoil and doubts were well written. I'm looking forward to the next part.
Collette
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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Hi Barbara,
I enjoyed this. Her inner turmoil and doubts were well written. I'm looking forward to the next part.
Collette
Comment Written 15-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 15-Jun-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
