Comment from jenelleish

Excellent

This is a very nice haiku poetry. You poem may be talking about seasons but can be interpreted in a meaningful way, like for instance, pertaining to someone's life. Great job.

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2008

Comment from Margaret Snowdon

Excellent

This is cleverly thoughtout
and presented, complemented
with an appropriate picture.

An ideal Haiku for the contest.

Good luck,
Margaret.

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2008

Comment from jackiesmuse

Excellent

I love the poem, the concept and the total presentation, visually.

bite blanches {great]

The only thing I would say, I think you can make it even stronger if you figure out a way to rework that final line without "the" in it.
ground awaits springtime
soil awaits springtime...
or something like that.

Best wishes in the contest.

:-) Jackie

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2008

Comment from Judian James

Excellent

I rarely write haiku, so certainly no authority, but this seemed a perfect example to me, and in any event, it's wonderful and I felt the cold! excellent Sue

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2008

Comment from Domino

Excellent

I'd suggest center texting and also losing the periods. Haiku, as I undertsand, should have no punctuation, unless completely necessary. You have the season, the vivid imagery and the satori.
Maybe write 3rd line as 'hard ground awaits spring' - this gets rid of 'the' and 'for' - uninportant words, IMHO.
Excellent idea and writing. Ray xx

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2008

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reply by the author on 25-Nov-2008

Wow...I had no idea what a controversial subject this issue. Don't get me wrong....what I'm referring to is after I read your comment on punctuation, I googled it and...whoa! There are actual poet committees on this issue! And societies arguing. Ha! Which is all good because it came from a language certainly not related to ours. I wanted to give you this link because it is very interesting. (I don't even believe the case is closed yet..ha!) http://hokku0.tripod.com/punctuation.htm - There are also 2 other links below that continue with the theme. Anyway....I really do appreciate your telling me that. As far as "THE" goes, yes I've been told that it could be an issue. Will most certainly consider this point also! Thank you very much for taking the time to highlight these points. Don't forget the link. It really is excellent reading! And many thanks for your most generous review. With warmest regards, Sue

reply by Domino on 25-Nov-2008

Thanks for the fun reply and info, Sue.
I used to write loadsa haiku, but only do so occasionally now. I think one's still paying in my portfolio, if you're interestad.
I just got fed up with all the different views on the rights and wrongs of the genre. I think the ones I highlighted are the most generally accepted. Best wishes, Ray xx

reply by the author on 25-Nov-2008

And I believe you are correct. Those are the two points that seem to be pretty much the "sticklers".

I will check out your portfolio for your haiku!!

Comment from Kingsland

Excellent

picture and words vibrate to each other in this well written short verse.These formats are not easy to write .But I feel you have done quite well with this one.This was my pleasure to have read and reviewed it... John

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2008

Comment from Perp Ihebom

Excellent

Yes indeed the ground waits for spring. This short poem contains a message of hope for a better future in spite of one's present circumstances. Beautiful Haiku poem. kudos.

 Comment Written 25-Nov-2008

Comment from Brian S. Pratt

Excellent

Winter's bite blanches,

--had to work my tongue to get this line right.

consuming autumn colors
--thought that followed the first very well.

Good poem

 Comment Written 24-Nov-2008

Comment from Hitcher

Excellent

Very nice friend, It fuses perfectly with the artwork and the words chosen in the first two lines are very strong, I've never attempted one yet so all I an say is I enjoyed it, well done.

 Comment Written 24-Nov-2008

Comment from Shane Marquardt

Excellent

Beautiful writing. You created quite the image and told a great story in very few words.
Thanks for sharing. I enjoyed my visit.

 Comment Written 24-Nov-2008