CSP: A Collection of Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 129 "Is it Possible"A collection of poetry
60 total reviews
Comment from dewley11
Of course it is possible.Do what you have already done.As long as it flows and says something valid that is all that matters,and you have done that.
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2008
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Of course it is possible.Do what you have already done.As long as it flows and says something valid that is all that matters,and you have done that.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2008
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dewley, thank you for your most encouraging words which give me even more confidence to write free verse! Your words mean so much. And thank you for your very kind review. With regards, Sue
Comment from Oatmeal
Sixteezkid,
I have helped quite a few author's explore poetry in many of the forms. I feel that you did a very good job here. Free verse can be anything. It does not have to have a structure as your poem here has. It can be varied thoughts or emotions, descriptions, or feelings or anything at all.
most of my poetry is free verse. I have experimented with other styles for the last few years that I have been here.
The impressions were vivid and the narration was nice. All of the lines are formatted very well.
There was no SPAG. No room for improvement.
I look forward to seeing you again.
Love you,
Oatmeal
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2008
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Sixteezkid,
I have helped quite a few author's explore poetry in many of the forms. I feel that you did a very good job here. Free verse can be anything. It does not have to have a structure as your poem here has. It can be varied thoughts or emotions, descriptions, or feelings or anything at all.
most of my poetry is free verse. I have experimented with other styles for the last few years that I have been here.
The impressions were vivid and the narration was nice. All of the lines are formatted very well.
There was no SPAG. No room for improvement.
I look forward to seeing you again.
Love you,
Oatmeal
Comment Written 12-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2008
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Oatmeal, I am so happy you have reviewed this work. All of your comments mean so much! I am looking forward to writing more free verse, as it did feel very nice and 'right' while I wrote. **smiles** and a big hug! Sue
Comment from mermaids
As a free verse writer, I enjoyed this piece and the artwork that goes with it. You wrote wonderful verses such as To brush off guilt as specks on a jacket's lapel, very creative.
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2008
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As a free verse writer, I enjoyed this piece and the artwork that goes with it. You wrote wonderful verses such as To brush off guilt as specks on a jacket's lapel, very creative.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2008
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mermaids, thank you for your very kind review. Am so glad you enjoyed it! And thank you for your lovely compliments. With warmest regards, Sue
Comment from bard owl
I enjoyed this free verse very much. It was a very introspective view into the soul, asking questions that require meditation to answer fully. I feel this poem stands in excellence just as it is. Poetry is an expression of the writer's thoughts and your questioning in the poem makes the reader do a self-evaluation. Excellent. Blessings, Linda
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2008
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I enjoyed this free verse very much. It was a very introspective view into the soul, asking questions that require meditation to answer fully. I feel this poem stands in excellence just as it is. Poetry is an expression of the writer's thoughts and your questioning in the poem makes the reader do a self-evaluation. Excellent. Blessings, Linda
Comment Written 12-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2008
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Linda, I am very glad to hear you enjoyed reading this. And I thank you for your most kind review and lovely comments. Warmest regards, Sue
Comment from Firefly54
Wow - some amazing lines here! I really loved this! Don't ask me about the technical stuff though... I usually struggle to read free verse, but I honestly enjoyed this!
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2008
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Wow - some amazing lines here! I really loved this! Don't ask me about the technical stuff though... I usually struggle to read free verse, but I honestly enjoyed this!
Comment Written 12-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 13-Dec-2008
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Firefly, thanks for your awesome review! Your 'wow' made me smile big!! So glad you enjoyed reading it. Means so much!! :-)) Sue
Comment from starman
I think the answer is yes to all you ask. Your verse is very enlightened and makes for a wonderful spiritual verse. Well done, indeed.
;)s
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2008
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I think the answer is yes to all you ask. Your verse is very enlightened and makes for a wonderful spiritual verse. Well done, indeed.
;)s
Comment Written 12-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2008
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Starman, thanks so much for your great review! And for your comments. Very glad you liked it. :-) Sue
Comment from cheyennewy
Hi Sue..for your first free verse you did an excellent job. I do think it is a little long but it did keep my interest. All the lines are good so if you decide to pare it down pick the lines you think might be redundant. As for as the question marks go I'm not sure I like them at the end of each line. To avoid this you could make the lines longer or you could use three dashes at the end of each thought and one question mark after the end line. Well done! Blessings....chey
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2008
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Hi Sue..for your first free verse you did an excellent job. I do think it is a little long but it did keep my interest. All the lines are good so if you decide to pare it down pick the lines you think might be redundant. As for as the question marks go I'm not sure I like them at the end of each line. To avoid this you could make the lines longer or you could use three dashes at the end of each thought and one question mark after the end line. Well done! Blessings....chey
Comment Written 12-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2008
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Believe it or not, I pruned a lot already. HA!! Oh my! Thanks so much for taking the time to offer your suggestions. Am going to highly consider them! And for your very kind review. With warmest regards, Sue
Comment from Mapleson
The question marks are great, it completely alters the tone to one of indecision. I like the ebb and flow of the line lengths almost like a heart beat.
Very poignant.
Kind Regards,
Mapleson
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2008
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The question marks are great, it completely alters the tone to one of indecision. I like the ebb and flow of the line lengths almost like a heart beat.
Very poignant.
Kind Regards,
Mapleson
Comment Written 12-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2008
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Mapleson, yes, I didn't think of it in those terms (the q. marks). But I did feel they were necessary. Thank you very much for your comment of the heart beat, also - and for your very kind review. Warmest regards, Sue
Comment from justmade
Well I love the freedom of expression that comes with free verse. I don't very much about these questions though, ... lol ...they are really deep and require a lot of pondering.
You did fine here with the free verse.
Much love,
Justmade.
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2008
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Well I love the freedom of expression that comes with free verse. I don't very much about these questions though, ... lol ...they are really deep and require a lot of pondering.
You did fine here with the free verse.
Much love,
Justmade.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2008
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Justmade, I will now give you the task to answer all the questions, as this was a test! HA!! Thanks so much for your great review. Now go ponder! Warmest regards, Sue
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You are welcome Sue I will see what I can do about the task you have assigned to me, haha wish me luck!
Comment from Freeflyer
I personally have never tried free verse. I did enjoy this though. The only thing I can say I thought could change is this and this is my opinion only: I enjoyed the start because it is emotionally strong and questioning as 90% of the verses are. "To run in the rain as each drop spills joy" is something we all can do and it is not as deep or profound as your other questions. I think the poem would have a lot more power if you could stick to wonder rather than reality. Please don't take this as criticism as it is not meant in that way. I did enjoy it and each question had me thinking.
Freeflyer
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2008
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I personally have never tried free verse. I did enjoy this though. The only thing I can say I thought could change is this and this is my opinion only: I enjoyed the start because it is emotionally strong and questioning as 90% of the verses are. "To run in the rain as each drop spills joy" is something we all can do and it is not as deep or profound as your other questions. I think the poem would have a lot more power if you could stick to wonder rather than reality. Please don't take this as criticism as it is not meant in that way. I did enjoy it and each question had me thinking.
Freeflyer
Comment Written 12-Dec-2008
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2008
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Freeflyer, this is exactly what type of critique I asked for. It means everything to me. I have been given similar suggestions. And you have made a good point here. Stick with the "wonder" rather than the "reality". Excellent! This gives me more of a measuring stick on where to prune! Thank you SO very much for your time on reading and suggestions. And for your most kind review! :-) Sue