Quietude
Heroic Crown Of Sonnets - 15 interlinked sonnets.84 total reviews
Comment from dorts
We all need time to ourselves. To sit and think and wonder if we have done the best with our lives and if we haven't to try to do better. It's a place where we can dream and be ourselves without anyone critising us. We have to have goals in life and contemplating them in our own space is a good place to start. I think I got the gist of your poem and I liked it very much. We all have to have something to look forward to.
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
We all need time to ourselves. To sit and think and wonder if we have done the best with our lives and if we haven't to try to do better. It's a place where we can dream and be ourselves without anyone critising us. We have to have goals in life and contemplating them in our own space is a good place to start. I think I got the gist of your poem and I liked it very much. We all have to have something to look forward to.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
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Thanks dorts. I think you got the jist just fine. And hope you felt all the love in there from soul to soul. MUAHHHHHHHHHHH.
Comment from Siddhartha Jatana
Very Very WELL DONE....
Kudos...
I appreciate your effort and passion...
Beautifully crafted and full of color and rich imagery...
What else to say?
Each Sonnet is beautiful and complete in itself...
Commendable...
Congratulations for having crafted such a wonderful piece...
Keep it up!
God bless u!
Love and Regards,
Sid
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
Very Very WELL DONE....
Kudos...
I appreciate your effort and passion...
Beautifully crafted and full of color and rich imagery...
What else to say?
Each Sonnet is beautiful and complete in itself...
Commendable...
Congratulations for having crafted such a wonderful piece...
Keep it up!
God bless u!
Love and Regards,
Sid
Comment Written 27-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
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Sigh ... thanks so much Sid. A real place where you can see me ... heart and soul are in this one. MUAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Comment from Valkarie
This epic piece of poetry is just magnificent in its own right, it flows well is concise and has everything to make it what it is, a fantastic piece. With a good balance and a narrative which handles the word play so wonderfully this is a impressive piece of writing which I find inspiring and running with adrenalin. The vocabulary used captures the tension of the piece so enigmatically making the piece most poignant with a powerful imagery that is most creative. A fine piece of writing.
Valkarie...
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
This epic piece of poetry is just magnificent in its own right, it flows well is concise and has everything to make it what it is, a fantastic piece. With a good balance and a narrative which handles the word play so wonderfully this is a impressive piece of writing which I find inspiring and running with adrenalin. The vocabulary used captures the tension of the piece so enigmatically making the piece most poignant with a powerful imagery that is most creative. A fine piece of writing.
Valkarie...
Comment Written 27-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
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Thank you so very much Valkarie!!! My heart and soul are in this one. Now you know me and who I am. MUAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Comment from Moira's Amethyst
'a masterpiece of loving words is born' indeed! i haven't witnessed one of these since "A wreath for Emmett Till". wow, over five hours? i know to make it through without an overload of thought you'd have to obviously compose the last sonnet first. trust me, i believe it's way better to do it that way. i mean i'd hate to have to go through the intricacy of composing the first fourteen beforehand hehe. anyway, so many awesome lines and the way you mingled the tone from bygone to modern at times made it more susceptible.thank you for sharing. please, take care.
sincerely,
Poetry's Protege aka Kaff Kaff
P.S
2nd sonnet, eighth line: did you mean "techelet"? and not 'tehelet'? seemed like a misspelling.
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
'a masterpiece of loving words is born' indeed! i haven't witnessed one of these since "A wreath for Emmett Till". wow, over five hours? i know to make it through without an overload of thought you'd have to obviously compose the last sonnet first. trust me, i believe it's way better to do it that way. i mean i'd hate to have to go through the intricacy of composing the first fourteen beforehand hehe. anyway, so many awesome lines and the way you mingled the tone from bygone to modern at times made it more susceptible.thank you for sharing. please, take care.
sincerely,
Poetry's Protege aka Kaff Kaff
P.S
2nd sonnet, eighth line: did you mean "techelet"? and not 'tehelet'? seemed like a misspelling.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
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Thanks so much Poetry's Protege!!! I believe I have the correct spelling of that beautiful blue dye, but I will check it again. Thank you so very much for the time you spent reading this one. I know when you did, you saw my heart and soul in there!!!
Comment from animatqua
I see the huge effort you put into this. I've written epic poetry, so I do understand and am loathe to give it less than a five star for that reason alone. Still, I would be less than honest not to mention a number of things.
First, there are allusions here that are either obscure, or twisted enough to fit the flow/form as to make them difficult to understand. This does not entice me to continue on, especially with a long poem. I had to read throguh four times to get the meaning of it, and I still do not have it all. I did this for the sake of a good review, but I doubt most would.
Second, I will admit to getting hung up on this line:
when fingers touch the dye of tehelet.
I'm missing something, or `tehelet' is a misspelled word, which throws this segment of the poem off. I went through several dictionaries, including one on line, and could not find this word.
The effort and the talent are both apparent here. It is just not a poem I could get a hold of.
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
I see the huge effort you put into this. I've written epic poetry, so I do understand and am loathe to give it less than a five star for that reason alone. Still, I would be less than honest not to mention a number of things.
First, there are allusions here that are either obscure, or twisted enough to fit the flow/form as to make them difficult to understand. This does not entice me to continue on, especially with a long poem. I had to read throguh four times to get the meaning of it, and I still do not have it all. I did this for the sake of a good review, but I doubt most would.
Second, I will admit to getting hung up on this line:
when fingers touch the dye of tehelet.
I'm missing something, or `tehelet' is a misspelled word, which throws this segment of the poem off. I went through several dictionaries, including one on line, and could not find this word.
The effort and the talent are both apparent here. It is just not a poem I could get a hold of.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
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Tehelet is a very very old Jewish word for a special blue dye. Sorry if it threw you but it was my thoughts tht carried this one and can't expect anyone out there to "get it" all. Nothing to get. It's just this little ol' poet girl telling what she feels, sees, hears and lives. I surely do thank you for the great review. Glad you read it all. Have no fear, this is not something I would do again tomorrow. Nest week, maybe but I was inspired with this one and it just flowed. I like it when that happens!!!!!! Have a great night poet. Oh, ya know, the points here mean naught to me so not to be concerned.
Comment from Fireshadow
Gungalo, this heroic crown of sonnets is quite an accomplishment, which I'm sure must have been a daunting undertaking. Strong rhyme scheme within an iambic pentameter framework to present this beautiful tribute to your loved one. I enjoyed each stanza, but particularly loved these lines :
it's then you must convince yourself to show
that openly you'll free your soul to bleed.
Excellent work, my friend.
Amarillys
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
Gungalo, this heroic crown of sonnets is quite an accomplishment, which I'm sure must have been a daunting undertaking. Strong rhyme scheme within an iambic pentameter framework to present this beautiful tribute to your loved one. I enjoyed each stanza, but particularly loved these lines :
it's then you must convince yourself to show
that openly you'll free your soul to bleed.
Excellent work, my friend.
Amarillys
Comment Written 27-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
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Thank you so much Amarillys!!! Unless we just let things be and be free, we aren't really and truly living. I love your words you left here for me and I'm wearing the smile that came with them. MUAHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Comment from Fleedleflump
A herculean achievement. I get the interlinking sonnets (well, after much practice, anyway!), but to form the final sonnets from the lines of the preceding 14 is mind boggling. Repeating lines are something of a stumbling block for me, although that makes me want the challenge!
Fantastic write, spot-on meter throughout, solid sonnets, and a final instalment that, against the odds, actually still makes sense.
Mike
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
A herculean achievement. I get the interlinking sonnets (well, after much practice, anyway!), but to form the final sonnets from the lines of the preceding 14 is mind boggling. Repeating lines are something of a stumbling block for me, although that makes me want the challenge!
Fantastic write, spot-on meter throughout, solid sonnets, and a final instalment that, against the odds, actually still makes sense.
Mike
Comment Written 27-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
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LOL, thanks Mike. You have no idea what is was like but truly I was totally inspired to write this. Might be years before I ever do another one or even find the words and breath. Awesome review, thank you!!!
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We feel inspired to sling our words around
with wild abandon bordering insane
until a rhythmic satisfaction found
within our spirits helps us to remain
upon the plinth 'Accepted Normal Man',
at least to all appearances we give,
but every poet true will understand;
only a nutcase bothers with a sieve
to filter out the words worth spending ink
upon a virtual paper born of light
until our peers can look our way and think
they know our souls with second hand insight.
The poet's inspiration is a dish
best served upon cold platters devilish!
There you go - you inspired me to scribble :-)
Mike
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Well now that really makes me happy, Mike. What a great write in your message. Me thinks you ought to post it. MUAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
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With a tiny alteration, I've done exactly that! It's currently in the 'Today's Well Received Poems' bit on the front page, which is fantastic :-)
Mike
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Ahhhhhhhhhhhhsome!!!
Comment from CodyJack
I'm out of breath now LOL. What an undertaking you accomplished. Great descriptive writing and full of fun and brilliance. Great job you did in all these sonnets. Cody
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
I'm out of breath now LOL. What an undertaking you accomplished. Great descriptive writing and full of fun and brilliance. Great job you did in all these sonnets. Cody
Comment Written 27-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
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Thanks Cody. I was so glad when it was finished. Breathe now. LOL. MUAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Comment from rudywalsh
Beautifully written, the longest poem I have ever read on fanstory, what an accomplishment, good for you, you must have the patience of a saint and the mind of a surgeon, a poem packed full with some wonderful expressions of love philosophy and gratitude, very creative and captivating.
An extremly well thought-out set of sonnets.
It's a book in it's self.
Thanks for the pleasure and have a wonderful week...Rudy
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
Beautifully written, the longest poem I have ever read on fanstory, what an accomplishment, good for you, you must have the patience of a saint and the mind of a surgeon, a poem packed full with some wonderful expressions of love philosophy and gratitude, very creative and captivating.
An extremly well thought-out set of sonnets.
It's a book in it's self.
Thanks for the pleasure and have a wonderful week...Rudy
Comment Written 27-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
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Thanks so much Rudy for a wonderful review of this one.
Comment from anabellapongasi
Whew! What an amazing feat - fifteen sonnets in one! One has to be really super-inspired to be able to write such a lengthy and very well crafted piece. Wonderful imagery,great meter and rhyme. Great job.
Anabella
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
Whew! What an amazing feat - fifteen sonnets in one! One has to be really super-inspired to be able to write such a lengthy and very well crafted piece. Wonderful imagery,great meter and rhyme. Great job.
Anabella
Comment Written 27-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2010
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Thanks anabell, you are right. A bit of ispiration is exactly what one needs. MUAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.