Eric's Epic Adventures Bk 4
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Eric And Herbie Are Off Again!"Eric And The Lost City of Atlantis
39 total reviews
Comment from rspoet
Hello Sandra,
Well, Atlantis better not still be under water or Eric may be in need of Aquaman and Herbie may short some electrical contacts. Some think Atlantis was in the Mediterranean Sea, perhaps a volcano imploded the whole island and it sunk below the waves.
Or maybe it was inhabited by aliens...hmmmm.
You're off to a rollicking good start. Kids love adventure stories, and what better adventure than to go to Atlantis.
The banter between Eric and Herbie was very well done.
Great beginning
Robert
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2020
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Hello Sandra,
Well, Atlantis better not still be under water or Eric may be in need of Aquaman and Herbie may short some electrical contacts. Some think Atlantis was in the Mediterranean Sea, perhaps a volcano imploded the whole island and it sunk below the waves.
Or maybe it was inhabited by aliens...hmmmm.
You're off to a rollicking good start. Kids love adventure stories, and what better adventure than to go to Atlantis.
The banter between Eric and Herbie was very well done.
Great beginning
Robert
Comment Written 18-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2020
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Thank you so very much for this fabulous review, Robert. It's so nice to know you enjoyed part one as that is the chapter that makes or breaks it. Being book 4 also is a challenge. But ... Eric is determined to find the absolute truth about Atlantis, so rest assured all will be revealed!! Lol. Thank you, my friend, for the golden star, giving me a 6, you are so kind. Big hugs, :)) Sandra xxxx
Comment from Tami Urbanek
I enjoyed reading your story in which you imagine your grandson as the main character. The story starts off with imagery in the classroom and easily transitions to his home with Herbie. Nice job!
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2020
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I enjoyed reading your story in which you imagine your grandson as the main character. The story starts off with imagery in the classroom and easily transitions to his home with Herbie. Nice job!
Comment Written 18-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2020
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Thank you so much for reading chapter one in this new story of Eric and his alien drone friend. I really appreciate your nice comments. Big hugs! :)) Sandra xx
Comment from juliaSjames
No artefact discovered this time. But Eric is on fire with the idea of finding Atlantis. I love the way he outmanoeuvred Herbie.
I have a query, Sandra. If Eric is having a snack in bed while watching a movie, why is he still wearing his school uniform? Or have I misunderstood something?
Blessings Julia
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2020
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No artefact discovered this time. But Eric is on fire with the idea of finding Atlantis. I love the way he outmanoeuvred Herbie.
I have a query, Sandra. If Eric is having a snack in bed while watching a movie, why is he still wearing his school uniform? Or have I misunderstood something?
Blessings Julia
Comment Written 18-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2020
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Hi Julian, no you didn't miss anything, but I'm glad you mentioned it. Eric always goes to his room to play on his computer and watches the tele for an hour before his dad comes home and then it's family time.That is his real life, so I'm going to have to add a sentence making it clearer he's NOT actually in bed, that's why he is still in his school uniform. Thank you for reading this first chapter of bk 4 my friend. :)) Sandra xxx
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Got it. Thanks for being patient with a newbie to the Eric books. :-))
Julia
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Julia, you are doing brilliantly! You've picked up an important point. Thank you!
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Appreciated, sweet Sandra
Comment from the13thpoet
Hello Sandra, a terrific Tuesday to you. I hope this finds you well. I wasn't expecting another adventure so soon, so thank your husband for me. I can't wait to see how this latest adventure will take shape. Have a great day!
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2020
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Hello Sandra, a terrific Tuesday to you. I hope this finds you well. I wasn't expecting another adventure so soon, so thank your husband for me. I can't wait to see how this latest adventure will take shape. Have a great day!
Comment Written 18-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2020
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Hello, my friend. I wasn't expecting to write another so soon, either! Lol, but when my husband came up with this idea and it was too good not to get it down. My mind went into overdrive! I'm delighted that you will be coming along to find the truth about Atlantis. I'm sure history is in the making! lol. Thank you! :)) Sandra xxx
Comment from Aaron Milavec
You write convincingly. I like the way that the teacher has cast the question (now that they are hooked). They need to decide. . . .
Then I like the playful banter between the boys as they set out to solve the mystery question.
But then we are left hanging? Is more to come?
Aaron
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2020
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You write convincingly. I like the way that the teacher has cast the question (now that they are hooked). They need to decide. . . .
Then I like the playful banter between the boys as they set out to solve the mystery question.
But then we are left hanging? Is more to come?
Aaron
Comment Written 17-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2020
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Hello Aaron, yes a lot more to come. This is the 4th book in the Eric series. Herbie is an alien drone, whose brain allows him to learn and evolve, and Gizmo is an alien machine attached to Eric's bike that can take Eric and Herbie to wherever they want to go. Now this adventure will start in earnest in the next part. I hope you'll be joining us on the trip back in time? Thank you for your positive thoughts on this part, the first chapter. Big hugs, Sandra xxx
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Okay, a lot more to come.
I'm puzzled. Can you be sure that you won't rewrite earlier chapters? Don't you prevent such edits if they have taken on a public posting already?
Aaron
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Before my books are published they are edited by me at least three times, that's after those on here have been kind enough to go through each chapter. The authors on Fanstory have been brilliant. Then I send the manuscripts to an editor who will go through it line by line.
I've got a trilogy of Time Travel books for grown-ups published, same characters with hugely different plots, and 3 of Eric's Epic Adventures. two of which are published and the third one is away being edited now.
I've had photos sent me by authors on here who have seen my books in their library (in America) I'm going to see about having them in the UK libraries seeing as it's my country. :) In hope that answers your question. :)) xx
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I forgot to mention, you can stop your work being seen outside Fanstory if you want to. I always say no when asked before releasing my work on here.
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Hi, Sandra,
Thanks for alerting me to this option: you can stop your work being seen outside Fanstory. Why was this important for you?
Sincerely,
Aaron
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If you want to publish your books you don't want the outside world to read your book for free, and if you want a publisher they won't take you on if you have allowed your work to be out there already. It's a safety button. My books are published some by myself and some with a traditional publisher.
I hope that helps. :)) Sandra
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Ah, now I see it. Makes perfect sense. Thanks for explaining things to me. ~Aaron
Comment from Cindy Warren
This promises to be a great story. I wonder what they will find in Atlantis. Something exciting, I'm sure. Some people think they were aliens. I think it probably did exist. Most legends have roots in fact.
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2020
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This promises to be a great story. I wonder what they will find in Atlantis. Something exciting, I'm sure. Some people think they were aliens. I think it probably did exist. Most legends have roots in fact.
Comment Written 17-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2020
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H Cindy, I wrote a poem especially for you, I think it's come off now, I meant to PM you. It's about Maggot Mummy! Anyway, yes, we are going to find out the truth about this lost city, so everybody will be left in no doubt that it is a real place! A place will be made in the history books for Eric and Herbie!!! LOL. Thank you so much for joining my duo again, my friend. Big hugs! :)) Sandra xxx
Comment from Mr.write_4u
Well, you got me hooked. I really enjoyed reading this adventure. You placed me right in Eric's room, with a Martian buzzing around. I'm looking forward to reading more. Thank you for sharing.
Happy writing,
Larry
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2020
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Well, you got me hooked. I really enjoyed reading this adventure. You placed me right in Eric's room, with a Martian buzzing around. I'm looking forward to reading more. Thank you for sharing.
Happy writing,
Larry
Comment Written 17-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2020
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Hi Larry! Thank you so much for coming along and reading the first part in the new book, I'll very much appreciate your thoughts as it goes along. Sending you a hug, my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from Gideon300
What a great gift these stories are to your grandson. And who doesn't love a good Atlantis adventure? I'm look forward to this Atlantis holiday, with all it's escapades. I also liked how you incorporated Plato, and a history lesson to boot. I personally believe Atlantis was real and Plato was giving a real account of a catastrophe that happened in the dim past.
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2020
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What a great gift these stories are to your grandson. And who doesn't love a good Atlantis adventure? I'm look forward to this Atlantis holiday, with all it's escapades. I also liked how you incorporated Plato, and a history lesson to boot. I personally believe Atlantis was real and Plato was giving a real account of a catastrophe that happened in the dim past.
Comment Written 17-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2020
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Hi Gideon, thank you so much for reading the first part of this story, I hope you continue to come along. I've done a lot of research into Atlantis, and there are so many different stories about it. I wonder if anyone will discover the real truth. Well, the intrepid duo are going to find out what it's really all about! You can trust their version, so they tell me! LOL. Thank you again, my friend. :) Sandra xxx
Comment from tfawcus
Your dear husband has done us all a favour! This sounds like an adventure with all sorts of possibility. I like the way you've tied this introductory chapter into previous books - a good way of introducing the characters. As always, great interactions between Eric and Herbie.
I enjoyed details like hopping from one leg to the other in his hurry to put those jeans on!
Not sure you need the 'off' here: sugar-free coke from (off) his bedside table
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2020
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Your dear husband has done us all a favour! This sounds like an adventure with all sorts of possibility. I like the way you've tied this introductory chapter into previous books - a good way of introducing the characters. As always, great interactions between Eric and Herbie.
I enjoyed details like hopping from one leg to the other in his hurry to put those jeans on!
Not sure you need the 'off' here: sugar-free coke from (off) his bedside table
Comment Written 17-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2020
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Thank you so much, Tony, for the lovely six stars and wonderful comments. Graham is good, his support of my writing helps me a lot. Now we are off to find out the truth of Atlantis. I'm so pleased you are going to come along, too. Big hugs my friend. :)) Sandra xx
Comment from JudyE
So we're off to Atlantis now. How exciting! Maybe one day Eric can come to Australia!
I picked up a few points but some I'm not sure of:
Eric picked up his glass of sugar-free coke from off his bedside table - I'd delete the 'off'
Had Eric not taken him home and repaired his rotors, he wouldn't be here, he'd just be a pile of junk. - period after 'here'
"No, of course I wouldn't. You'd be lost without me," he told him, and gave one of his tinkly giggles.
Eric threw one of his pillows at him and laughed as - this is really picky but you have 'one or his tinkly giggles' and 'one of his pillows'. I might have just said 'Eric threw a pillow at him'
"Atlantis ... your lost city. But like Aquaman, Atlantis doesn't exist either." - there is an extra space after 'city'.
Eric sat quietly for a while. - there's an extra space in front of 'Eric'
"Okay, if it doesn't exist there would be nowhere for Gizmo - comma after
'exist' perhaps?
Eric giggled, but he knew Herbie was right, he always was! - period after 'right'
"Look, I agree with most of what you said, but how would it be any different to the last three times we've just turned up out of nowhere. - Question mark after 'nowhere'
You can't go out in your school uniform, it might get ruined." - period after 'uniform'
Cheers
Judy
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2020
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So we're off to Atlantis now. How exciting! Maybe one day Eric can come to Australia!
I picked up a few points but some I'm not sure of:
Eric picked up his glass of sugar-free coke from off his bedside table - I'd delete the 'off'
Had Eric not taken him home and repaired his rotors, he wouldn't be here, he'd just be a pile of junk. - period after 'here'
"No, of course I wouldn't. You'd be lost without me," he told him, and gave one of his tinkly giggles.
Eric threw one of his pillows at him and laughed as - this is really picky but you have 'one or his tinkly giggles' and 'one of his pillows'. I might have just said 'Eric threw a pillow at him'
"Atlantis ... your lost city. But like Aquaman, Atlantis doesn't exist either." - there is an extra space after 'city'.
Eric sat quietly for a while. - there's an extra space in front of 'Eric'
"Okay, if it doesn't exist there would be nowhere for Gizmo - comma after
'exist' perhaps?
Eric giggled, but he knew Herbie was right, he always was! - period after 'right'
"Look, I agree with most of what you said, but how would it be any different to the last three times we've just turned up out of nowhere. - Question mark after 'nowhere'
You can't go out in your school uniform, it might get ruined." - period after 'uniform'
Cheers
Judy
Comment Written 17-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 17-Feb-2020
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Thank you so much, Judy, for your help with my errors. I've sorted them all now. :)) I'm so delighted to know you are going to be tagging along on this adventure, I'm really pleased you liked the fist part. Big hugs! :)) Sandra xxx