to darkness
3-6-9 Contest14 total reviews
Comment from LG Wolfe
I got into the stark setting right away and stayed there. Your use of stripped down words to reflect your stripped down state of mind worked really well. Honest, bare, naked, ashen. Clever.
I interpret the gods as being loneliness and loss, and you're headed into the darkness now. A well constructed poem.
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2019
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I got into the stark setting right away and stayed there. Your use of stripped down words to reflect your stripped down state of mind worked really well. Honest, bare, naked, ashen. Clever.
I interpret the gods as being loneliness and loss, and you're headed into the darkness now. A well constructed poem.
Comment Written 20-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2019
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Thank you very much for the thoughtful and empathetic review. Thankfully, this is not inspired by real personal grief, but just an expression of what that is like.
Steve
Comment from Gail Denham
It's a good poem entry - not sure what the last line exactly means. Does this mean the gods have gone to the darkness - or has darkness come upon you? Several lines I liked - "of an honest river" - nice term.
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2019
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It's a good poem entry - not sure what the last line exactly means. Does this mean the gods have gone to the darkness - or has darkness come upon you? Several lines I liked - "of an honest river" - nice term.
Comment Written 20-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2019
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Thanks, Gail.
I think the voice of the poem is the one heading even deeper into the darkness of grief. Not exactly cheerful, but it's just what came out!
Steve
Comment from RodG
What works for me most in this poem is how the stark imagery of the scene (first two stanzas) complements the TONE of the lonely Speaker who has suffered some kind of loss. That picture definitely suits the topic. Rod
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reply by the author on 23-Apr-2019
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What works for me most in this poem is how the stark imagery of the scene (first two stanzas) complements the TONE of the lonely Speaker who has suffered some kind of loss. That picture definitely suits the topic. Rod
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2019
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Thanks, Rod. Not inspired by real events, thank goodness - just an expression of how overwhelming grief can be.
Steve
Comment from lyenochka
Not sure about the meaning here but there is a definite feeling of falling from skies to water to depths of night and the second stanza transitions us from a natural observation to a deeper emotional/spiritual one.
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reply by the author on 23-Apr-2019
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Not sure about the meaning here but there is a definite feeling of falling from skies to water to depths of night and the second stanza transitions us from a natural observation to a deeper emotional/spiritual one.
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 23-Apr-2019
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Thanks, Helen. Just exploring the overwhelming nature of great grief and loss...
Steve
