The French Letter
Viewing comments for Chapter 53 "A Web of Deceit"A Novel
30 total reviews
Comment from Jan Anderegg
Your writing style is easy to read. The dialogue is natural and flows well. Descriptions are great. I did not find any errors reading through this. Well done. I can't comment on the plot or story, with this being so far advanced in the novel.
Excellent work.
All the best,
Jan
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2019
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Your writing style is easy to read. The dialogue is natural and flows well. Descriptions are great. I did not find any errors reading through this. Well done. I can't comment on the plot or story, with this being so far advanced in the novel.
Excellent work.
All the best,
Jan
Comment Written 20-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2019
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Thanks, Jan. It's been a complex interweaving of plot, but I'm beginning to draw some of the threads together now. I appreciate your comments about the writing style. Best wishes, Tony
Comment from Pantygynt
What you have done here is really rather interesting. Bamforth and Durand represent the totally committed spymasters totally unconcerned about morality beyond the simple us and them compartments. Brandon is by contrast a normal human being forced by his own normal human desires to ally himself with them. It really shouldn't work. In there terms Brandon is a perpetual security risk.
As a story though it is intriguing.
"I think he was about to accuse me of homophilia, David." I thought that was compulsory these days. Lol.
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2019
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What you have done here is really rather interesting. Bamforth and Durand represent the totally committed spymasters totally unconcerned about morality beyond the simple us and them compartments. Brandon is by contrast a normal human being forced by his own normal human desires to ally himself with them. It really shouldn't work. In there terms Brandon is a perpetual security risk.
As a story though it is intriguing.
"I think he was about to accuse me of homophilia, David." I thought that was compulsory these days. Lol.
Comment Written 20-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 22-Apr-2019
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I think you may be right about Charles being a liability rather than an asset.
Following from your comment about homophilia, I visited some wineries up in the Clare Valley a few weeks ago. One of them that has just undergone extensive renovation now has four toilet choices: Men, Women, Undecided, and Disabled. I can't recall exactly what was on the door of the new facility - something like 'Non-Gender Specific'.
Comment from krys123
Cheers, Tony!
>I forgot to humbly thank you for having the friends you are reading this wonderful story to be editors, eyes, and ears.
> What I'm saying this because I know this would be a bestseller you could be making some buckoes...
>The following line I took from your beginning of your chapter and put the word "again" From the end of the thought to the middle after the subject noun.-->>>
>>"This obnoxious man, "AGAIN", was beginning to get under my skin [again] and it was just as well a knock on the door cut me short." ["What do you think, Tony, as I was trying to give it emphasis?"]
>Yet some funny humorous points in here and I was enjoying the Some of that under-the-breath humor.
>Now you got Charles, almost smacking Jeannie or Mme. Durand, but has to hold back, because Bamforth kept Brandon at bay.
> Now Charles elected to go back with Helen and feels like he has to disclose what's going on but he can't tell Kayla, probably for her own good. I just wonder Phil tell Helen because he does love her?
> He's going back to Pakistan, with Helen, to hook up with Kayla and I know you got other stuff up your sleeve, you sly devil/writer. Chuckle!
> Well, your story's taken off, Tony, and is it pretty much writing itself, also, but I just hope when it's taking off and ready to fly that you've got the reins? Chuckle!
> Thanks for really well entertaining read, Tony.
>I want to start calling this my "Tony Mystery Hour" and like Lawrence Welk, I'll have the bouncing ball go over every word you've writen. Chuckle! X's two.
>Take care and have a good one, Tony.
Alx
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2019
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Cheers, Tony!
>I forgot to humbly thank you for having the friends you are reading this wonderful story to be editors, eyes, and ears.
> What I'm saying this because I know this would be a bestseller you could be making some buckoes...
>The following line I took from your beginning of your chapter and put the word "again" From the end of the thought to the middle after the subject noun.-->>>
>>"This obnoxious man, "AGAIN", was beginning to get under my skin [again] and it was just as well a knock on the door cut me short." ["What do you think, Tony, as I was trying to give it emphasis?"]
>Yet some funny humorous points in here and I was enjoying the Some of that under-the-breath humor.
>Now you got Charles, almost smacking Jeannie or Mme. Durand, but has to hold back, because Bamforth kept Brandon at bay.
> Now Charles elected to go back with Helen and feels like he has to disclose what's going on but he can't tell Kayla, probably for her own good. I just wonder Phil tell Helen because he does love her?
> He's going back to Pakistan, with Helen, to hook up with Kayla and I know you got other stuff up your sleeve, you sly devil/writer. Chuckle!
> Well, your story's taken off, Tony, and is it pretty much writing itself, also, but I just hope when it's taking off and ready to fly that you've got the reins? Chuckle!
> Thanks for really well entertaining read, Tony.
>I want to start calling this my "Tony Mystery Hour" and like Lawrence Welk, I'll have the bouncing ball go over every word you've writen. Chuckle! X's two.
>Take care and have a good one, Tony.
Alx
Comment Written 20-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 20-Apr-2019
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Great review, Alx. I agree entirely that the placement of ?again? is important. I had already moved it u from the end of the paragraph and you may be right that it deserves even more prominence. I shall have to take a look.
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You're very welcome, Tony, and where you going to take me the next day, and the next, and the next?
Chuckle!
Alx
Comment from estory
This is becoming a grand design of manipulation, as we discover how Mme. Durand has been using Helen all this time to gain knowledge of drug traffickers/ terrorists. and it seems Buckari was unwittingly murdered just as the secret service plans on moving in to gain information. The dead pan personalities of the secret service people really dig into the realm of people who have given up their personalities and characters to manipulate other people for the benefit of their jobs, their employers. It really is a dead pan world here. Charles seems to still have some feelings for Helen, and seems to run into this plot just to get close to her again. he has his own interests in mind. What will he do? Who will he help? An interesting fork in the road seems to be up ahead. estory
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2019
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This is becoming a grand design of manipulation, as we discover how Mme. Durand has been using Helen all this time to gain knowledge of drug traffickers/ terrorists. and it seems Buckari was unwittingly murdered just as the secret service plans on moving in to gain information. The dead pan personalities of the secret service people really dig into the realm of people who have given up their personalities and characters to manipulate other people for the benefit of their jobs, their employers. It really is a dead pan world here. Charles seems to still have some feelings for Helen, and seems to run into this plot just to get close to her again. he has his own interests in mind. What will he do? Who will he help? An interesting fork in the road seems to be up ahead. estory
Comment Written 19-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2019
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I appreciate your continued interest and support. Thanks very much. Best wishes, Tony.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written chapter and the plot unfold even more. Many confusions seem to answer for itself and we start to get the pieces of the puzzle fit in one after another.
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2019
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A very well-written chapter and the plot unfold even more. Many confusions seem to answer for itself and we start to get the pieces of the puzzle fit in one after another.
Comment Written 19-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2019
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I appreciate your continued interest and support, Sandra. Thanks very much. Best wishes, Tony.
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Intriguing chapter full of well defined characters. A thick plot. Cynical pragmatism and effective foreshadowing. Some super-sleuthing going on here. Well crafted and interest. An enjoyable read.
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2019
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Intriguing chapter full of well defined characters. A thick plot. Cynical pragmatism and effective foreshadowing. Some super-sleuthing going on here. Well crafted and interest. An enjoyable read.
Comment Written 19-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2019
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Thanks, Brett. I appreciate your continued interest and support. Best wishes, Tony.
Comment from Ulla
wow, Tony, this is so well written, but I've no six left in my purse to give you. You so clearly deserve it. It's intriguing to say the least and you seem to do intrigue so very well. So now he is to see Helen again. Hmm! All the best. Ulla:))
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2019
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wow, Tony, this is so well written, but I've no six left in my purse to give you. You so clearly deserve it. It's intriguing to say the least and you seem to do intrigue so very well. So now he is to see Helen again. Hmm! All the best. Ulla:))
Comment Written 19-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2019
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I appreciate your continued interest and support, Ulla. Thanks very much. Best wishes, Tony.
Comment from Shirley McLain
Excellent chapter and full of intrigue. Your characters are good and the dialogue was excellent. I am looking forward to reading more of this story. Shirley
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2019
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Excellent chapter and full of intrigue. Your characters are good and the dialogue was excellent. I am looking forward to reading more of this story. Shirley
Comment Written 19-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2019
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I appreciate your continued interest and support, Shirley. Thanks very much. Best wishes, Tony.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Superb writing as always, Tony. The plot most certainly is thickening. Can Charles keep that secret from Helen and risk losing her? Now that he knows what Jeanne is, he can't go against her even though he still doesn't like her. It will be very interesting to read how their next meeting goes. Well done, my friend. :) Sandra xx
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2019
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Superb writing as always, Tony. The plot most certainly is thickening. Can Charles keep that secret from Helen and risk losing her? Now that he knows what Jeanne is, he can't go against her even though he still doesn't like her. It will be very interesting to read how their next meeting goes. Well done, my friend. :) Sandra xx
Comment Written 19-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2019
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Thanks, Sandra. I have a feeling that the next scene between Charles and Helen might be quite a difficult one to write.
Comment from Debbie Pope
You do descriptions so well. That first paragraph is simply beautiful. I love the delicate, fairy bell sound of the mantle clock. I also like the ominous tone of your last lines. Great way to end a chapter. I am glad that Charles is getting back with Helen. The separation will make the reunion sweeter, I hope. But with your final ominous words, who knows.
Great chapter.
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2019
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You do descriptions so well. That first paragraph is simply beautiful. I love the delicate, fairy bell sound of the mantle clock. I also like the ominous tone of your last lines. Great way to end a chapter. I am glad that Charles is getting back with Helen. The separation will make the reunion sweeter, I hope. But with your final ominous words, who knows.
Great chapter.
Comment Written 19-Apr-2019
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2019
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Thanks, Debbie, for your lovely review and for the sixth star. Best wishes, Tony.