The Rocking Chair
Short story - 578 words31 total reviews
Comment from rama devi
Oh my gosh, that's a horrible thing to have gone through, dear. of course it was traumatic on your impressionable mind at that age. So glad you decided to pursue the cathartic avenue of writing about it. This is well-told and has a good flow with no nits except for two minor comma-related spags:
* It was 1967(,) and I was six years old. My babysitter, Mary Jane, and my older sister, Becky, looked on from the living room.
*
My sister was 2 ½ years older than I(,) and Mary Jane was probably only thirteen but had been our beloved summer babysitter for a couple years.
I'm sorry you had to experience that. Sending healing thoughts...
Love,
rd
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2017
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Oh my gosh, that's a horrible thing to have gone through, dear. of course it was traumatic on your impressionable mind at that age. So glad you decided to pursue the cathartic avenue of writing about it. This is well-told and has a good flow with no nits except for two minor comma-related spags:
* It was 1967(,) and I was six years old. My babysitter, Mary Jane, and my older sister, Becky, looked on from the living room.
*
My sister was 2 ½ years older than I(,) and Mary Jane was probably only thirteen but had been our beloved summer babysitter for a couple years.
I'm sorry you had to experience that. Sending healing thoughts...
Love,
rd
Comment Written 12-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2017
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Thank you for your healing thoughts and great review:) I made the comma changes.
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:-))))
Comment from Mustang Patty
Hi Teresa; I sincerely hope that writing the story out was able to help you sort through your feelings. Maybe, someday, your sister will finally apologize. Just reading about the ordeal drummed up a whole bunch of feelings for me,
~patty~
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2017
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Hi Teresa; I sincerely hope that writing the story out was able to help you sort through your feelings. Maybe, someday, your sister will finally apologize. Just reading about the ordeal drummed up a whole bunch of feelings for me,
~patty~
Comment Written 11-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2017
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Thank you so much Patty:) I think we've all had cruel things done to us that stick with us.
Comment from Janet Foor
This is a horrific story Teresa. I can't imagine the fear and anguish you must have experienced at the had of someone you trusted. I am appalled at your mother for ever allowing the babysitter back in your home. This is a trauma that has haunted for years. I'm glad you were able to put it down on paper and hopefully, you will get past this event.
Blessings
Janet
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017
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This is a horrific story Teresa. I can't imagine the fear and anguish you must have experienced at the had of someone you trusted. I am appalled at your mother for ever allowing the babysitter back in your home. This is a trauma that has haunted for years. I'm glad you were able to put it down on paper and hopefully, you will get past this event.
Blessings
Janet
Comment Written 11-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017
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I don't think I realized until much later how traumatic it had been. I've never had hard feelings against the babysitter - she was nice, fun and a good sitter (she was 13 - we all do stupid):) But it did have an impact on my life. Thanks so much Janet:)
Comment from Dean Kuch
Getting these sort of traumatic events out of our heads, down on paper (or Microsoft Word as the case were), and into some tangible form that we and others can see often helps us deal reasonably with the emotional stress attached to them, Teresa.
It's much of the reason I write the types of things I do.
It also helps to get feedback from others on events like these, especially when someone shares a similar sort of experience. Now I'm not saying we would wish something as horrific as being tied to a chair and left unattended for a few hours on anyone. But I AM saying that it's nice to know we're not alone.
After all, misery loves company.
Allowing experiences such as this to remain bottled up inside permits them to fester in our brains like an infected hair follicle would on our skin.
I hope your infection's been purged ... for now.
Best wishes to you in the contest.
~Dean
~Dean
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017
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Getting these sort of traumatic events out of our heads, down on paper (or Microsoft Word as the case were), and into some tangible form that we and others can see often helps us deal reasonably with the emotional stress attached to them, Teresa.
It's much of the reason I write the types of things I do.
It also helps to get feedback from others on events like these, especially when someone shares a similar sort of experience. Now I'm not saying we would wish something as horrific as being tied to a chair and left unattended for a few hours on anyone. But I AM saying that it's nice to know we're not alone.
After all, misery loves company.
Allowing experiences such as this to remain bottled up inside permits them to fester in our brains like an infected hair follicle would on our skin.
I hope your infection's been purged ... for now.
Best wishes to you in the contest.
~Dean
~Dean
Comment Written 11-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017
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Thank you Dean:)
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:-)))
Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin
Hi, Teresa
= Jeesh--how horrible.
= Amazing how things like that follow us the rest of our lives.
= Hopefully, writing about it helps.
= Hyphenate ages.
= When writing ages, the rule is be consistent and write them the same way throughout.
= 6 ½-years-old -- 2 ½-years older (no hyphen before =older=
> and I was [six years old] (six-years-old). My babysitter,
> My sister was [2 �½ years] (two-and-a-half-years) older than I and Mary Jane
<> A Smile Is A Frown Turned Upside-down (*>*)
<> Cheers <> Jax / Jackie
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017
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Hi, Teresa
= Jeesh--how horrible.
= Amazing how things like that follow us the rest of our lives.
= Hopefully, writing about it helps.
= Hyphenate ages.
= When writing ages, the rule is be consistent and write them the same way throughout.
= 6 ½-years-old -- 2 ½-years older (no hyphen before =older=
> and I was [six years old] (six-years-old). My babysitter,
> My sister was [2 �½ years] (two-and-a-half-years) older than I and Mary Jane
<> A Smile Is A Frown Turned Upside-down (*>*)
<> Cheers <> Jax / Jackie
Comment Written 11-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017
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Thanks Jax for the spag help!
Comment from honeytree
The art work was great
for these words written
How terrible it must
have been tied to the chair
An accident could have happened
quite easily and hopefully you were ok
I wonder if your sister would have liked
this to happen to her.
Honey tree
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017
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The art work was great
for these words written
How terrible it must
have been tied to the chair
An accident could have happened
quite easily and hopefully you were ok
I wonder if your sister would have liked
this to happen to her.
Honey tree
Comment Written 11-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017
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Thank you Annie:)
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That's fine
Annie.
Comment from Gloria ....
Yes, siblings can be very cruel without even realizing the scars they are imprinting on young, vulnerable sisters or brothers. I hope your sister apologizes one day, but from the sounds of it, I wouldn't count on it.
This is very well written Teresa. I can feel your anguish and fear clearly. Hugs to you.
I hope your sister reads this.
Thank you for sharing.
Gloria
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017
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Yes, siblings can be very cruel without even realizing the scars they are imprinting on young, vulnerable sisters or brothers. I hope your sister apologizes one day, but from the sounds of it, I wouldn't count on it.
This is very well written Teresa. I can feel your anguish and fear clearly. Hugs to you.
I hope your sister reads this.
Thank you for sharing.
Gloria
Comment Written 10-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017
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Thank you for the kind review Gloria:)
Comment from MelB
I'm so sorry, Teresa! This was clearly very traumatic and mean of those girls to do. It's sad your sister never apologized either, especially when you told her how you felt.
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017
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I'm so sorry, Teresa! This was clearly very traumatic and mean of those girls to do. It's sad your sister never apologized either, especially when you told her how you felt.
Comment Written 10-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017
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Thank you Melissa. I'm sure my sister will never apologize for anything.
Comment from Connie C
I can certainly see, Teresa, how this could have affected you for the rest of your life. How sad that your sister never apologized. Your description of what you went through that day is so vivid that it's easy to understand why it made such an impact on you.
To this day, I am claustrophobic and I'm pretty sure it is a result of a something that happened to me when my cousin, who was much bigger than me tried to suffocate me with a pillow. He was just playing, but I never forgot that.
Thank you for sharing. I hope it was a little therapeutic for you to write about this.
Connie
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017
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I can certainly see, Teresa, how this could have affected you for the rest of your life. How sad that your sister never apologized. Your description of what you went through that day is so vivid that it's easy to understand why it made such an impact on you.
To this day, I am claustrophobic and I'm pretty sure it is a result of a something that happened to me when my cousin, who was much bigger than me tried to suffocate me with a pillow. He was just playing, but I never forgot that.
Thank you for sharing. I hope it was a little therapeutic for you to write about this.
Connie
Comment Written 10-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017
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Oh Connie that pillow incident had to be awful. Those kinds of things have a way of effecting us forever. Thank you for the kind review and the wonderful twinkles:)
Comment from Walu Feral
G'day Teresa.
I just had to go back and check. I sincerely hoped this was fiction. Ouch!
My mom came home to find me sitting in the kitchen tied to a little red child's rocking chair, ( I want to swear, but I'm stuck for words.)
"Apparently, Mary Jane and Becky found me particularly annoying that day." (I often find some kids annoying... but I don't tie the up!)
"With her mom at home right next(door),"
So sad. It's good you can finally put it on paper and I hope it helps you.
Oh, BTW, I hate babysitters and refuse to let anyone look after Champers, our 9yo daughter. If I can't take her where I go, then I am not welcome either. I didn't go to my best mates wedding because "Kids weren't allowed," I was supposed to be the best man and didn't know the "kid rule" until the day before.
Good luck in the contest.
Cheers Fez
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017
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G'day Teresa.
I just had to go back and check. I sincerely hoped this was fiction. Ouch!
My mom came home to find me sitting in the kitchen tied to a little red child's rocking chair, ( I want to swear, but I'm stuck for words.)
"Apparently, Mary Jane and Becky found me particularly annoying that day." (I often find some kids annoying... but I don't tie the up!)
"With her mom at home right next(door),"
So sad. It's good you can finally put it on paper and I hope it helps you.
Oh, BTW, I hate babysitters and refuse to let anyone look after Champers, our 9yo daughter. If I can't take her where I go, then I am not welcome either. I didn't go to my best mates wedding because "Kids weren't allowed," I was supposed to be the best man and didn't know the "kid rule" until the day before.
Good luck in the contest.
Cheers Fez
Comment Written 10-Jul-2017
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2017
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Yes, you never know what babysitters might do. I like your attitude. You are such a kind man - you who went through so much in your life and you are feeling pain for me. Thank you my friend:)