The Bleeding Absolution
sometimes your dark peers find you a way out15 total reviews
Comment from pattipac
Okay,I my interpretation may be way off, but feel your writing about seven shades of seven sins- born from drug addiction- weeping for the life that could have been. Excellent use of word choice, and alliteration.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
Okay,I my interpretation may be way off, but feel your writing about seven shades of seven sins- born from drug addiction- weeping for the life that could have been. Excellent use of word choice, and alliteration.
Comment Written 20-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Ooh, I like it. This came out in a rush - fingers madly trying to keep up with my thoughts - so it's very much open to interpretation. I very much like yours :-).
Mike
Comment from Sasha
This sent shivers up my spine. Dark, creepy, and brilliantly written. Wow, you did a superb job with this one. I'll have to look up 'Shaking the Doll' by Heather Nova, to see where this came from Terrific work with this.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
This sent shivers up my spine. Dark, creepy, and brilliantly written. Wow, you did a superb job with this one. I'll have to look up 'Shaking the Doll' by Heather Nova, to see where this came from Terrific work with this.
Comment Written 20-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Thanks so much, my friend :-). Heather Nova's written some brilliant dark songs (mostly her older work) and she's very good at putting a sting in the tail. I enjoyed writing a dark ditty for a change!
Mike
Comment from adewpearl
strong rhymes
the bleeding edge of mystery - love the imagery and the visual
good alliteration in seven sins and in design denied - good assonance there too
Oh, my God, the narrator just slashed his wife to death - now I have the creeps and need to go to Facebook to look at cute Sawyer pictures LOL :-) Brooke
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reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
strong rhymes
the bleeding edge of mystery - love the imagery and the visual
good alliteration in seven sins and in design denied - good assonance there too
Oh, my God, the narrator just slashed his wife to death - now I have the creeps and need to go to Facebook to look at cute Sawyer pictures LOL :-) Brooke
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Comment Written 20-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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lol, thanks so much, Brooke :-). I loved following the path of your reactions through my poem!
Mike
Comment from Cindy Warren
Ok, that creeped me out. It sounds like the poor guy should be on some heavy medication to get rid of those 'friends' inside. The glass stare of his bride suggests that he's either headed for jail or a hospital for the criminally insane.
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reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
Ok, that creeped me out. It sounds like the poor guy should be on some heavy medication to get rid of those 'friends' inside. The glass stare of his bride suggests that he's either headed for jail or a hospital for the criminally insane.
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Comment Written 20-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Thank you, Cindy :-). It's good to know the poem has the desired effect. I haven't written a dark one for a while so I think this was waiting to come out!
Mike
Comment from N.K. Wagner
Super-creepy, Mike, A fabulous piece. The mention of multiple personalities adds to the horror (which ones were aware of the crime, which not?). And those last two lines gave me shivers. Outstanding, sir. :) nancy
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
Super-creepy, Mike, A fabulous piece. The mention of multiple personalities adds to the horror (which ones were aware of the crime, which not?). And those last two lines gave me shivers. Outstanding, sir. :) nancy
Comment Written 20-Jun-2014
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2014
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Thanks so much, Nancy :-). Have you seen the film Identity? It's got one of my favourite 'reveals' ever - you just reminded me of it. I'm so glad you liked this!
Mike