Steve's Poems for Kids
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "Miss Melody and the Smileys"A collection of my children's poems
28 total reviews
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Six very good stanzas in mono-rhyme and very well written. It's a really happy poem that children will love. You have used some great alliteration - especially your first line. I think perhaps being a children's poem 'strordin'ry might cause a pause - I certainly did, but some of your own made-up words are great. Good luck in the contest
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Six very good stanzas in mono-rhyme and very well written. It's a really happy poem that children will love. You have used some great alliteration - especially your first line. I think perhaps being a children's poem 'strordin'ry might cause a pause - I certainly did, but some of your own made-up words are great. Good luck in the contest
Comment Written 18-May-2014
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Thanks, Dorothy - glad you enjoyed.
Sorry about 'strordin'ry - I did have second thoughts about it but it demanded to go there and I'm sure is easily accepted when you hear the poem read aloud.
Steve
Comment from Shirley E Kennedy
What a wonderfully jolly children's poem with a delightful cadence and lots of frivolity and fun.
This is just the style of poem that children will enjoy reciting and giggling
Along with.
A felightful flashback to childhood poetry.
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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What a wonderfully jolly children's poem with a delightful cadence and lots of frivolity and fun.
This is just the style of poem that children will enjoy reciting and giggling
Along with.
A felightful flashback to childhood poetry.
Comment Written 18-May-2014
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Thanks so much for the generous review.
Steve
Comment from Jackarrie
This is a brilliant poem, I loved the whole feel of joyfulness all the way through it. Every line is animated.
Now Melody knew that this framjumptious sound
Must arise from the world where the Smileys abound,
Where Jesters and Jaffas and Jokers are found,
Where nobody ever has fretted or frowned.
I loved it. a deserved six.
A great entry into the contest. Good luck, Mary
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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This is a brilliant poem, I loved the whole feel of joyfulness all the way through it. Every line is animated.
Now Melody knew that this framjumptious sound
Must arise from the world where the Smileys abound,
Where Jesters and Jaffas and Jokers are found,
Where nobody ever has fretted or frowned.
I loved it. a deserved six.
A great entry into the contest. Good luck, Mary
Comment Written 18-May-2014
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Mary, thanks so much for the enthusiastic review and the six stars. Seems you managed to pick a winner...
Steve
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I sure did, a big congratulations. great poem Mary
Comment from w.j.debi
This would be a fun poem to read to children and which they would enjoy hearing because of the fun rhymes and rhythm. It's a cute story and the nonsense words would catch their ear. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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This would be a fun poem to read to children and which they would enjoy hearing because of the fun rhymes and rhythm. It's a cute story and the nonsense words would catch their ear. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 18-May-2014
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Thanks for the generous review.
Steve
Comment from seaglass
This is a fun, rhyming poem with a musical meter. It has funky, creative words the kids like and tells a story of a young girl fulfilling a dream that kids relate to.
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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This is a fun, rhyming poem with a musical meter. It has funky, creative words the kids like and tells a story of a young girl fulfilling a dream that kids relate to.
Comment Written 18-May-2014
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Thanks for the positive review.
Steve
Comment from adewpearl
solid use of mono-rhyming in each quatrain
fun use of abundant alliteration
clever use of coined and unusual words
effective use of high-impact verbs to add life/action and mood to the scene
vivid detail with strong sensory appeal
great humor - I'm sure this will appeal to children with their great imaginations :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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solid use of mono-rhyming in each quatrain
fun use of abundant alliteration
clever use of coined and unusual words
effective use of high-impact verbs to add life/action and mood to the scene
vivid detail with strong sensory appeal
great humor - I'm sure this will appeal to children with their great imaginations :-) Brooke
Comment Written 18-May-2014
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Brooke, thanks for the thoughtful analysis.
Steve
Comment from LIJ Red
As long as there is no actual plagiarism steering near the good stuff of past masters is fine-and wise. This is good
poetry for such few young ones as will listen anymore...
I didn't mean to say you had imitated-you just captured the flavor of Carroll and Lear-a fine thing indeed-if you like jabberwockies and such.
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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As long as there is no actual plagiarism steering near the good stuff of past masters is fine-and wise. This is good
poetry for such few young ones as will listen anymore...
I didn't mean to say you had imitated-you just captured the flavor of Carroll and Lear-a fine thing indeed-if you like jabberwockies and such.
Comment Written 17-May-2014
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Thanks for the kind words.
I am intrigued by your comment about past masters - I wasn't thinking about imitating anyone when I wrote this. Looking back, there might be a touch of Lewis Carroll - is that who you were thinking of?
Steve
Comment from Charlene0513
A very exhilarating and joyous poem that would tickle the innards of any child. Wonderful creativity and alliteration used. A perfect example of just how a life of no cares can uplift even the ones feeling the worst.
Charlene
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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A very exhilarating and joyous poem that would tickle the innards of any child. Wonderful creativity and alliteration used. A perfect example of just how a life of no cares can uplift even the ones feeling the worst.
Charlene
Comment Written 17-May-2014
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Thanks so much for the kind words.
Steve
Comment from a.w.brooks
Reminds me of Dr. Suess loved it, thanks for writing the story and the words and the feel flowed together very well thanks again happy writing
reply by the author on 20-May-2014
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Reminds me of Dr. Suess loved it, thanks for writing the story and the words and the feel flowed together very well thanks again happy writing
Comment Written 17-May-2014
reply by the author on 20-May-2014
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Thank you!
Steve
Comment from Nosha17
This has a flavour of Edward Lear (They went to sea in a sieve, I think was the first line)and his nonsense rhymes. It was full of fun characters and colourfully fun language and I am sure kids would love it. Good luck in the contest. Faye
reply by the author on 20-May-2014
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This has a flavour of Edward Lear (They went to sea in a sieve, I think was the first line)and his nonsense rhymes. It was full of fun characters and colourfully fun language and I am sure kids would love it. Good luck in the contest. Faye
Comment Written 17-May-2014
reply by the author on 20-May-2014
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Thanks for the review and also for reminding me about the Jumblies - I'm sure I've seen the poem before but it must have been a long time ago and I enjoyed reading the wonderful piece of nonsense all over again.
Steve
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I just read that it won, congratulations, I can always spot a winner! I also love "The Owl and the Pussycat" by Lear, that is my favourite of all time. Thank you for sharing, Faye