Poetry
Viewing comments for Chapter 41 "A nature walk"Words to pass on to my children
27 total reviews
Comment from Jumbo J
Hi Mary,
as I read this, I am reminded of what attracted me to your writing in the first instance... your amazing imagery... my minds eye see your words and translates them back into picture form... a true talent!
The rhythmic tone gave this beautiful walk a true sense of belonging... someone that is grateful to her surrounds and the nature that offers everything to those who take the time to see and feel the beauty...
loved your added notes, always great to know a little more about the history of ghost laid in yesteryear... and a beautiful photo just to make your talent complete.
Beautifully penned... and all the very best of Irish luck to you in the contest!
Kindest thoughts,
James xx
******STARS!!!!!!
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2013
Hi Mary,
as I read this, I am reminded of what attracted me to your writing in the first instance... your amazing imagery... my minds eye see your words and translates them back into picture form... a true talent!
The rhythmic tone gave this beautiful walk a true sense of belonging... someone that is grateful to her surrounds and the nature that offers everything to those who take the time to see and feel the beauty...
loved your added notes, always great to know a little more about the history of ghost laid in yesteryear... and a beautiful photo just to make your talent complete.
Beautifully penned... and all the very best of Irish luck to you in the contest!
Kindest thoughts,
James xx
******STARS!!!!!!
Comment Written 07-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2013
-
Thank you so much James for the absolutely fantastic review on my poem, I had originally written it in aabb style, and when I saw the contest requirement of abab, not my easiest form to write, but I worked on it, without changing what I wanted to write Thanks again Mary
Comment from Joan E.
Thanks for the additional context and history in your notes. I enjoyed your alternating rhymes as you vividly described the scene. Best wishes in the contest. Cheers- Joan
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2013
Thanks for the additional context and history in your notes. I enjoyed your alternating rhymes as you vividly described the scene. Best wishes in the contest. Cheers- Joan
Comment Written 06-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 07-Nov-2013
-
Thanks Joan for the wonderful review. Mary
Comment from n.rosej.
I've said this before, but it needs to be said again...your writing flows so gracefully, and with such ease; you are truly talented. Beautiful words, and I love the way you always add 'decoration' at the top and bottom, it accentuates beautifully.
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2013
I've said this before, but it needs to be said again...your writing flows so gracefully, and with such ease; you are truly talented. Beautiful words, and I love the way you always add 'decoration' at the top and bottom, it accentuates beautifully.
Comment Written 06-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2013
-
Thanks for the great compliments rose, and the Star rating. Mary
Comment from adewpearl
You took a lovely photo :-)
good use of abab rhyme
nice proximate rhyme in deem/scene
good alliteration in nature knows
lovely descriptive detail throughout that creates a wonderful mood of appreciation for the beauty of this place :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2013
You took a lovely photo :-)
good use of abab rhyme
nice proximate rhyme in deem/scene
good alliteration in nature knows
lovely descriptive detail throughout that creates a wonderful mood of appreciation for the beauty of this place :-) Brooke
Comment Written 06-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2013
-
Thanks Brooke for this great review. I really appreciate it. Mary
Comment from allborn66
This is a wonderful poem. You communicate your theme well. The word choice is strong. The rhyming scheme enhances the piece.
Barbara
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2013
This is a wonderful poem. You communicate your theme well. The word choice is strong. The rhyming scheme enhances the piece.
Barbara
Comment Written 06-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2013
-
Thank you for this wonderful review, I am so pleased you enjoyed it. Mary
Comment from country ranch writer
looks like it wants to say come and join me today please stay awhile for It is lonely here and you cam be here for me on this day please stay awhile before you walk away
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2013
looks like it wants to say come and join me today please stay awhile for It is lonely here and you cam be here for me on this day please stay awhile before you walk away
Comment Written 05-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2013
-
Thanks for the wonderful comments, and great review. Mary
-
welcome
Comment from krys123
A beautifully descriptive poem of a simple walk through a Wonderland of remarkable happenings. The image replaces you into a solemn and serene atmosphere that in the collective nature makes one feel at calm with themselves. Your rhyming quatrains were done very well in neither of your rhymes were forced, labored or strained. The rhythm may need a little bit of help however it is done just as well to make it very easy for me to read and understand your poem. Thank you for sharing this with your fans, myself and other readers/writers. You have a good day Mary and God bless.
AK
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2013
A beautifully descriptive poem of a simple walk through a Wonderland of remarkable happenings. The image replaces you into a solemn and serene atmosphere that in the collective nature makes one feel at calm with themselves. Your rhyming quatrains were done very well in neither of your rhymes were forced, labored or strained. The rhythm may need a little bit of help however it is done just as well to make it very easy for me to read and understand your poem. Thank you for sharing this with your fans, myself and other readers/writers. You have a good day Mary and God bless.
AK
Comment Written 05-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2013
-
Thanks AK for the great comments and the review. Mary
-
You are so welcome Mary
Comment from tbacha58
as the night closes in the stars are all glowing
bright stars emerging from the blindness of day
beckoning and twinkling their luminous showing
night gazers,with telescopes come out to play
Beautiful poem with the outstanding view. It so nice and so much beauty to live around such an envierment. Hugs Terry
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2013
as the night closes in the stars are all glowing
bright stars emerging from the blindness of day
beckoning and twinkling their luminous showing
night gazers,with telescopes come out to play
Beautiful poem with the outstanding view. It so nice and so much beauty to live around such an envierment. Hugs Terry
Comment Written 05-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2013
-
Thanks Terry for the great comments and wonderful review I appreciate it. Mary
Comment from Selina Stambi
Hi Mary,
Oh, what a beautiful, breathtaking picture you paint, of Time-Stood-Still!
I've read of the Battle of the Boyne. The author notes help to put the ancient-and-modern into perspective.
Lovely!
xxx
Sonali
(breathtaking - one word) beauty of this glorious scene
the families of Deer's ... plural of deer is deer ... I.e. the families of deer ...
In order not to spoil the rhyme, suggest a minor change to the first line in the stanza:
nothing has changed here in many a year ....
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2013
Hi Mary,
Oh, what a beautiful, breathtaking picture you paint, of Time-Stood-Still!
I've read of the Battle of the Boyne. The author notes help to put the ancient-and-modern into perspective.
Lovely!
xxx
Sonali
(breathtaking - one word) beauty of this glorious scene
the families of Deer's ... plural of deer is deer ... I.e. the families of deer ...
In order not to spoil the rhyme, suggest a minor change to the first line in the stanza:
nothing has changed here in many a year ....
Comment Written 05-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2013
-
Hi Sonali,I appreciate the help on this, of course the plural of deer is deer, thanks for pointing it out and and the suggestion Mary
Comment from Gungalo
nothing has changed here in so many years
the glorious sunsets, giving joy and thrills
lazily grazing are the families of (-D)deer(-'s)
as evening glow settles on the distant hills
WHat a glorious walk you've taken us on Mary. Wonderful descriptions and great telling of so many wondrous things. The wildlife is wonderful and the stargazers awesome.
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2013
nothing has changed here in so many years
the glorious sunsets, giving joy and thrills
lazily grazing are the families of (-D)deer(-'s)
as evening glow settles on the distant hills
WHat a glorious walk you've taken us on Mary. Wonderful descriptions and great telling of so many wondrous things. The wildlife is wonderful and the stargazers awesome.
Comment Written 05-Nov-2013
reply by the author on 05-Nov-2013
-
Thanks Pam, for the excellent review I am glad you enjoyed it. Mary.
-
Smile